Falling behind

                                    

                                          
Your heart dropped to the pit of your stomach. Fall in love? 
                          
You didn't know how to fall in love much less be distracted from your Jedi training. You didn't think this through. You paused and looked across at the sunlight peeking in through the window. Your heart began to burn because of the words that were approaching your lips. 
                          
Before you could speak, Ben's lips crashed into yours. Hard and perfectly lining up with yours. In the matter of seconds you completely forgot about your estranged worry. You just wanted to kiss him, all of him, all of the time. Was that falling in love? Are we even allowed to do this? By the time you could reach any conclusion, you were already sure that you didn't want this to end. Wherever you landed, you were okay with falling.
                          
Then and there, you and Ben Solo became inseparable. His hands grasped your shoulders and walked you towards his cot, mouth still covering yours with pink warm lips. His hands ran up your sides as you felt the warmth grow in your cheeks and between your legs. His hand made its way up to your neck, slightly stroking his two fingers across your jawline. His tongue slipped into your mouth and made perfect circles around your tongue until it pulled out into a perfect kiss. 



                          
"I want you to lay down for me." He spoke against your lips and backed his head away so that his hazel honey eyes were spilling into yours. He quickly re arranged the sheets on his bed to make comfort for you. His voice was more yearning than you had ever heard. You nodded in submission and lay your whole body across the cot. He towered over your body and let a tiny grin slip from his mouth. He leaned down and rested his hands to hold him up on the sides of the cot. his leaned his body down against yours and pressed his lips against your ear. 
                          
"When you cum for me, I want you to remember who you belong to now. Okay?" His eyes met with yours, a flush of pink was brought to your cheeks. You nodded yet again, not wanting to stutter. 
                          
"I want you to say it," His hands travelled in between your legs brushing the outside of your panties barely with his two fingers, "Say it. Say you're mine." His fingers barely ran across your clit from outside your panties. You bit your lip and your pussy throbbed in anticipation.
                          
"Ben.. I'm yours. I'm completely yours." You already felt your heartbeat racing and the air being sucked from your lungs. 
                          
Ben looked up at you in assurance. With one swift movement, he pushed your robes to the side and slid down your underwear as quick as he could. Your breathing was tensing up. His hands wrapped around your ankles, slowly he pushed your legs apart exposing the liquid that was stuck to your leg. 
                          
"So I see you're ready for me." His eyes were glued to your cunt. You could feel his warm breath blowing out over the your wet pussy. You wanted him inside of you so bad. 



                          
He quickly intercepted your thoughts and bent down to kiss the inside of your thighs. When he reached the stain of liquid on your thigh, without hesitation he pressed his tongue against it scooping up your fluid and swallowing it with ease. Your eyes closed in satisfaction. All of the sudden you felt an invisible hand pull your head back up by your hair to face Ben. His eyes were set on yours. 
                          
"Look at me." He commanded as he lifted your hips up with his hands. This was becoming more like your dream. He positioned you better so that his mouth was perfectly aligned with your pussy. His tongue danced across your lips, teasing your opening. Your jaw clenched trying to hold back your desperation.
                          
"Please Ben.." You moaned under your breath.
                          
"Say my name again." His tongue brushed over your clit barely. Your pussy jetted out liquid. 
                          
"Ben! Please! fuck." There was aggression in your voice. Your heart felt like it was going to explode. 
                          
His tongue quickly pressed against your clit flicking up and down. His hands gripped your thighs and his eyes were still on yours. You let out a whimper knowing you wouldn't last long. The invisible hand gripped around your hair pulling your head back against the pillow. Your eyes squeezed shut in pleasure and pain. 
                          
"Tell me how much you like my mouth on your cunt, whore." Bens voice rang with commanding attention. You were thrown off by what he had just said.
                          
"Whore?" Your pleasure plummeted until the warmth left your cheeks and you could only hear your breathing overlapping his. The hand around your hair released and you sat up against the wall. 
                          
His lips hovered away from your cunt and his face grew serious. His lips pierced. 
                          
"That isn't what I meant... I don't know why I said that. I'm so sorry." His brows furrowed into a concerned look. 
                          
What the hell are you doing? 
                          
You quickly sat up and scurried to put on your robes. Your mind blurred all of the verifiable facts that Ben Solo wanted to be with you, but so much of you didn't trust him. He gave you a feeling of corruption, a feeling that wouldn't bring any good. 
                          
"Ben I can't do this. As much as I want to believe you, I don't think this is what's best for us." you picked up your panties off the floor where he had dropped them, his hand grabbed your wrist roughly. The look in his eyes were dramatic. 
                          
"Don't go (y/n). I... I need you to stay and just bare with me. Please." The look in his eyes were desperate, sad. But the feeling in your gut was more important. Even though your heart wanted different.
                          
"Who was in your room earlier?" You looked into Bens eyes and asked the question with circumstance. His lips pierced together as he just stared into your eyes like he was trapped and you couldn't find an answer. "Ben tell me who that man was." 
                          
Ben nodded his head and his eyes shifted towards the floor. He lay his head down in shame. He felt defeated because he knew you would never see him the same if he had only told the truth. 
                          
"Okay. Then this is done. Goodbye, Ben. I hope you know what you're doing." Your shoulders rolled back as you held your head high and walked out of the door into the sunlit hallways of the corridor leaving Ben Solo in complete darkness.