sixteen

                                    

                                          
Kelly suggests that we take shifts sleeping. There's no sense in all of us staying awake throughout the night. It's imperative that we get enough rest so that we can be prepared when we reach Environettix's headquarters. Before Kelly can finish his sentence about the importance of us getting some rest, Wyler is asleep, or should I say, passed out, with his head in my lap. I gently lift his head and place it on the seat cushion, then slide in next to him. I don't really have a choice but to lie down and curl up next to Wyler. There's not a lot of space in the vehicle, plus the added body warmth helps. Kelly is trying to save fuel by not running the heat too high, which might become impossible in the near future, considering the further we drive into the abyss, the lower the temperature drops.
                          
As I try to fall asleep in the back of the bumpy vehicle, I'm reminded of just a week ago when Lex was in the back on my WRX, fast asleep, while Wyler tried to discreetly discuss our feelings for one another. I remember being panicked that Lex would wake up and hear us, and now here I am, with Wyler's body nuzzled in next to mine, while Lex sits in the front seat fully aware of our feelings for one another, or what I thought were our feelings for one another. It's crazy how much has changed in such a short time. Our impending doom remains the same, but our roles in this weird friendship/love triangle have certainly changed. As odd as it is, lying next to Wyler while Lex sits just a few feet away, it feels so natural at the same time, like this is the way it was always meant to be. I have to remind myself that it's not that way though, at least not for Wyler, I think. I'm almost grateful for Kelly's steely stare that I periodically catch in the rearview mirror, snapping me out of my thoughts and helping me to stay grounded in reality. While I can't quite figure out where Wyler and I stand, I have to say I'm just as confused, if not more so, by Kelly. What is it about him? Why is he so protective of me when it comes to Wyler? Is he following orders from Ivanov to keep Wyler away from me, and if so, why? And why did I see images of my past when I kissed him in his room, or more importantly, why did I kiss him to begin with? Why do Kelly and Wyler seem to hate one another so intensely? They clearly have a past, but I know as little about it as I seem to know about my own. My questions are like a record circling around and around, playing on repeat in my brain, as if I could make sense of them if I just replay it long enough. But the memories of my past evade me, and my eyelids grow heavy.
                          
I'm awaken by a jolt as the vehicle comes to a screeching halt. I don't know how long I've been asleep, but there's no way we can be there already, is there? Wyler is awoken from his drunken slumber and we both slowly sit up, rubbing our eyes and trying to make sense of our surroundings.
                          
"What's going on?" I ask, unsure if I want to hear the answer.
                          
"There's something in the road," Kelly replies, as he leans towards the windshield, trying to see the object that is blocking our way.
                          
I look out the window, but can't see a single thing. Snow spirals like a cyclone, making it hard to decipher which direction is up or down.
                          
"Go around it," Wyler suggests, having finally awoken. He wipes a spot of drool from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand.
                          
"So glad you're awake to give me such ingenious advice," Kelly lays on the sarcasm. "I can't go around it, Einstein. It's too big and the snow on either side of he road is too deep. We'll get stuck."
                          
"What is it?"
                          
"I don't know, but we're going to find out," he says, pulling his fur lined hood over his head and zipping his jacket all the way up to his chin. We all follow suit, including when he pulls out his gun and readies it for action. He turns around and hands a gun to Wyler. There's no way he can be sober enough yet to handle a gun, which makes me concerned that whatever is out there; Kelly thinks it's worth the risk of arming an extremely intoxicated Wyler in order to help protect us. I try not to think too much about what awaits us on the other side of the vehicle as I step into the darkness. I steady my hands and prepare for the worst.