Chapter 15: To the "basement"

                                    

                                          
It's been so boring…
                          
"No belligerent humans around...just stupid kids and pharmacists!" Lupusregina yells and starts wagging her arms around. 
"I know...I wanted to kill somebody…" I whine and puff.
"Well, we could...you know...do it anyway…" 
                          
Bad idea. 
                          
"Somebody in Nazarick's probably watching, so bad idea." 
"Ugh, I hate to say this, but you're right…" 
                          
Nothing. And we've been walking for hours, all around Nazarick. 
                          
"We're supposed to be back in an hour, so let's take one last look around…" I say after a while of silence. 
"Okay, fine...maybe we'll find something interesting this time…" 
We both get up and start walking around the woods again distractedly. 
"So how's it like being Shalltear's slave?" 
                          
What? Okay. 
                          
"It's alright, I guess. She's pretty nice to me." I answer and shrug. 
"Uh-huh? That's all?" She asks curiously. 
                          
She sounds like she knows something.
                          
"You're probably going to tell me something clever aren't you?" 
A stupidly wide grin forms on Lupusregina's face and she gives me a very strong pat on the back. 
"That's right, kid! So are you sure that there isn't something else deep deep deep inside you?"
                          
Huh? 
                          
"I don't think so...why?" 
"Oh, I don't know...maybe because this morning when the human maid heard you screaming in your sleep she was forced by yours truly to tell her what she heard."
                          
Well, I'll be damned. 
                          
"Oh...that." 
"Yeah, that!" 
                          
Well, I'm done for! 
                          
"It was just a nightmare." I try to convince her. 
"Oh, yeah...you must have seen she's got nothing under her shirt! Unlike me!" 
                          
Okay, what the hell… 
                          
"Um...n-no. I…" 
                          
I what? I need to stop leaving sentences unfinished! 
                          
"Oh, come on, tell me!" 
                          
"...yeah, he told me the vampire is a kid with brown hair and…dead... nothing…" 
                          
Wait those were voices. 
                          
"Shh. Did you hear that?" I whisper. 
"What?" 
I put my index finger over my lips and hide behind a tree, then Lupusregina hides behind a tree to my left.
                          
"...Hah, all those people couldn't handle a vampire? Worthless…"
                          
I take a quick look at my partner and see a funny look on her face as she points to me. I nod and tell her to come to me. Then I see her disappearing before my eyes, and I look around me for a bit. Then I suddenly feel a hand on my shoulder and I jump in surprise and almost scream. 
                          
And she's behind me. How? 
                          
"Don't ever do that again." I whisper. 
"Why? I was just having fun!" 
"Now isn't the time for fun, now it's time to-" 
                          
Crack. 
                          
I accidentally stepped on a dead branch. 
"Did you hear that?" 
                          
Oh good, there goes the element of surprise. 
                          
"Okay, now we go in guns blazing. One each, okay?" Lupusregina whispers in my ear. 
"Got it." 
We both rush out of our hiding spots and head to the two enemies. I take the one on the right and charge him head on, I dodge one of his swings and then I punch him in the face, sending him on the ground unconscious. 
"It was that easy? Oh well…" I muse to myself and take a look at Lupusregina. 
Her human's dead body is laying on his back, in a puddle of blood and with his head mashed to a pulp. 
"Is he dead?" She asks walking to me. 
"Nah, unconscious. I wanted to take him to Nazarick to torture him a bit." I say with a grin. 
"You're into torturing? That sounds like something my sister would do." She says with a weird look.
"Which one?" 
"Solution!" 
                          
Oh, right. That very sexy blondie that I met when I woke up in Nazarick.
                          
"Oh, okay. Come on, little human, it's time to go." I say jokingly and put the guy on my shoulders. 
                          
Good thing my physical strength is enhanced, this guy feels as heavy as a cat. 
So not much. 
                          
"Let's go. Oh, can I ask you a favor?" I say. 
"What?" 
"Walk behind me and if you see him waking up, knock him out again." 
                          
Simple. 
                          
"Sure, alright! Let's go!" 
After walking for a little bit, we make it back to Nazarick's entrance, and we get in. Then when we get in front of my room I stop and drop the human on the floor. 
"This is my stop." I say with a smile. 
"Alright! You're a funny one, kid, I like you. I'll see you later in the throne room!" She says as she walks past me and disappears before my eyes again. 
"Mark?" 
                          
Oh, Shalltear's here. 
                          
"Hello boss. I just got back from my little trip, and I brought you a gift." I say as I point to the unconscious soldier laying on the ground. 
"Oh...I see. This guy's for me?" She asks. 
"I hate to say it, but yeah. You should have him to yourself. A good servant puts their boss's well-being before his." I say raising my index finger. 
"And a good boss makes sure that her servants are happy and healthy, so you keep him." 
                          
Oh, really? 
                          
"Yes, really. You were the one who did all the work, so yes. I know you're a good servant even if you don't give me gifts. I'll take you to the basement, where you can have some fun."
She grabs my arm and the human's and teleports us to the "basement". Then she helps me tie the guy up and after she's done she waves and teleports away. 
                          
I've got to report to King Ainz in a few hours, I have some time.
                          
I patiently wait for the human to wake up as I take a look at my knife to ascertain it's in good conditions. 
"Ugh...what…" 
                          
Oh, I see my subject is waking up. 
                          
I keep looking intensely at my knife and only after I hear a terrorized gasp do I look at the human. 
"You're awake. Welcome to my torture room, do you like it?" I ask quietly. 
"L-let me go…" 
"And why would I do that? You're here now, you might as well stay. It's rude to refuse somebody's hospitality, don't you think?" 
"No...please...I'll do anything...please…" 
                          
Oh, will he? 
                          
"Hmm...if you'll do anything, then I need you to listen." 
"Wh-what?" 
"You heard me. Listen to me and I will make your death quick." I lie. 
                          
Of course I won't. That's the point of torturing. 
                          
"Th-there's no way for me to survive is there?"
"Exactly, very perceptive. A quick death is the best I can offer." 
                          
He's crying. Good. 
                          
"Alright…" 
"Hm. So...I've got a doubt." 
"Wh-what is it?"
I make a very small hole under his chin with the knife, and a small flush of blood flows down his neck. 
"You've got a wife, don't you?" 
"Y-yes…" 
"Hm, good. And you love your wife, don't you?" 
"Yes…" 
"So...I want you to listen carefully to what I'm going to say."