Hey I know I haven't updated is not like anyone is Reading this. I just had question. Did you ever have seated down on your bed and think that you wouldn't have even survived this world From the Start. Life is just a emotional roller coaster brings you up then with a bam it goes down the ramp. You could've notice I got better in last school year but this every emotion hit me like a truck from emotions of bullying, sexual assault, disappointed parents, anxiety, depression, and loneliness so yea this year was the pretty sucky. Moving away is the best for you they said. Everything is going be okay they said. You can make new friends they said. You getting better anyways they said. But let me tell you something THIS NOT FUCKING OKAY. I'M NOT FUCKING GETTING BETTER AND I CAN'T STAY WITH ONE FRICKING FRIEND I MADE THEIR. I wear a fake as a smile just to hide all the pain and being so fake to have a fit in but you know what I'm tired of putting this fake smile I had this since 3rd grade and I'm tired I NEED FUCKING HELP but I'm to scared to ask because I'm to afraid that they will think I'm weak. I face my fears everyday but no matter I do I will always be afraid of people because they touched me wear I didn't want them to. They bullied me. My own my mother said I was worthless child for nothing good child then come back to me tell she loved me I will always forgive her bc she is my mom she is always with me even though she brakes more. People have left me and ignored and pushed me asied and I am scared and if u ever met me you will know I will never say I'm scared. I have a memory my friend was squishing me in the bus but feelings squished by a girl and me being under brought me memories of a girl that came to my house and mad me do stuff and from my friend squishing me I started crying at first idk why until a image pop in my head. Haha funny my life has been a full disaster and I still have hope even though I know it won't get better. I've been strong not to do drugs not skipping school but now I'm skipping school but idk about drugs I know a friend who has them and he'll give me some. I find it Halrious like LOL 😂😂 so funny that moving away is the best for you I finally it Halrious is because they were FUCKING WRONG okay that's it not going lie I'm crying because I'm writing this lol
*hey (●’◡’●)ﾉ this a/n inside a/n hah but my friend was squishing me was lesb and made me more insecure about the situation even tho a girl sexually harassed me I still support the LGBTQ oh BT the way THIS IS NOT A SUICIDAL NOTE OK I think that's it okay bah byeeeeeeee and always have a smile😄 even if your sad like me just fake till u make it (it doesn't really works but tricks others)
