Jin cries in her arms. He's been holding it for so long. He's been trying to keep it bottle for so long and this is his breaking point. 
                          
She keeps her son close to her. Rubbing circle on his back, rocking forward and backward softly calming him down like what she always did when he broke down years before. 
                          
"I promise to never cry, I will prove it to you" 
                          
Her little bold son said to her and her husband years before. The look on his face, tell thousands of unreadable things. Her little son never wanted them to see him slipping to his weak side. Seokjin was never a weak child to begin with. He always been bold, the complete opposite to his brother. 
                          
Seokjung was an understanding child, sweet and all, like the first born always had in their selves but Seokjin was bold, he never wanted them to control his life. He never like the path that they wanted him to be, he stands on his own, creating his path. It's his life to live. She knows her son, Kim Seokjin, Seokjin, Jin never hate her and his father in his life but she knows, Jin hated them for once and they couldn't blame him for that. They are the one who at fault. 
                          
Her heart break the most when she saw her little bold son trying to held everything within himself. She couldn't look at him, seeing him trying to swallow everything down making sure to mask everything. Once, she took a step forward, approaching her baby.
                          
"Cry all you want. You have feeling, things can be hurt. For you to promise us to never cry, we have failed you. We really did" 
                          
And that was the first time Jin had his break down, crying so hard telling her that it was so hard. It was so hard to pretend that everything is alright. 
                          
She never understand her mother when she told her to always take care of Jin. She never said that about her first born, Seokjung but she always told her that Seokjin is too bold. She never understand what her mother meant by that until the first time she saw her little son had the first breakdown. He masked it all for his surrounding, pretending everything is okay so that no one catch him slipping. 
                          
The bold son Kim Seokjin, hide his feelings well. He hides it so well that all she can think is, how often he did this? 
                          
"I don't want you to be sick, not on your day. Let's go home" she says to his ear softly. 
                          
...
                          
After his break down, Jin really feel lighter. A feeling of burdens off his shoulders. He do feel sorry for making his parents felt like he was avoiding them. A reminder to him, he never hate them, never do, he just hated the situation he was in. 
                          
"You looks like shit" Seokjung comments when he arrived at home for their dinner.
                          
"Thank you, I really appreciate that" Jin says before gulping down some of the water in the glass.
                          
"I was kidding" Seokjung replying, walking closer, tackle his only brother, giving him a hug.
                          
A violent set of coughs from Jin. It took Jin awhile to calm down and when he did, he smacked his brother hard, almost cursing. 
                          
"I was drinking the water you idiot. If you want to be dead that bad, at least let me swallow the water first-" 
                          
And Jin stops his words midway. Feeling weird all of sudden, something familiar but not yet. 
                          
"Hey, are you alright?" his brother asks, sounding concern. 
                          
Jin nods.
                          
The rest of the day went well except for a tiny tingling in his head. 
                          
...
                          
Taehyung woke up feeling something wrong. He couldn't tell what because he himself does not know what is wrong with the day. It's his birthday but he feel something was off. Quickly he sets his legs on the floor and went straight to a room. Jin's room. 
                          
Something is definitely off. He did not know what but he thinks, maybe it's Jin. Ever since the eldest came back from his house, Jin has been acting a little bit off.
                          
With a soft knock, Taehyung steps in. With or without Jin's permission, Taehyung steps into the dim room, seeing something he can't describe. Jin on the floor clutching his heart, breathing heavily with his hair looking messing, a hint of tears on his face 
                          
Without thinking further, Taehyung sprints closer to Jin, trying to give the eldest some sort of comfort like what he always do when Taehyung was in distress.
                          
"Don't touch me!" Jin yells, attempting to calm himself down without any help.
                          
Taehyung remains frozen in his spot. 
                          
"Please leave me alone, please leave me alone, please" Jin says again and again like a mantra to Taehyung. 
                          
He did not understand what happened but Taehyung surely knows that Jin needs time so he left the room for awhile. 
                          
When he steps out, he sees the members demanding look, trying to get an answer from Taehyung of what was happening in there. As much as Taehyung wanted to tell them, he is just as clueless as them.



                          
...
I'm sorry for the long hiatus, I have no excuse