Chapter 16

                                    

                                          
Keith pov
It was getting heavier and heavier. I was sure he would never want to speak to me again. After all he'd said, he had to of hated me. Maybe you are a slut. Why did you let him kiss you? I tried to stop it! No one would believe that im so disgusting. 
                          
Suddenly someone opened the door. 
"Oh shit- are you okay? Oh my gosh" I didn't listen to them because of the overwhelming feeling that I was a disappointment ruined my regular senses. 
They grabbed my hand and pulled me up and walked me somewhere I'm not sure where it was but when I opened my eyes I was in the office. 
Great, now you're going to get everyone involved in your little freak out. 
It was so bad. I held onto my head and tried my best to push away the thoughts but with each one I fought off, a wave would follow. 
                          
I stayed there until Shiro came. He grabbed me and pulled me into a hug, one I needed. It was no use, the thoughts were overpowering me. I was weak l, why did I keep fighting. A voice coming from in the distance told me to breathe. I tried but they kept coming in sharp painful breaths. 
                          
When I'd finally calmed down it was an hour later. I was exhausted. I felt awful. 
Shiro was looking at me. 
"What happened?" I said. He smiled sadly at me and told me it was a panic attack. A bad one I guess. 
                          
I nodded and looked down at my lap. I was hugging them apparently. I let the fall down and moved my hand to run through my hair, but it was all matter and tangled. A really bad one I guess.
                          
He asked me if I wanted to talk about it but I shook my head. I just wanted to go to sleep. I still felt awful. But if I even thought about Lance I knew I'd relapse into stress and guilt. 
                          
And home is where I spent the next couple days. I heard lance bad come by every now and then. There were calls on my phone, but I convinced myself he just wanted to tell me off a little more. Stupid I know, but it felt that way. Finally, on Sunday, I heard tapping on my window. I looked over and saw him smiling at me. I didn't realize how much I missed his smile and those bright blue eyes. I couldn't help but smile for a second before the guilt washed over me again. 
I contemplated it, did he really want to just yell at me? He looked happy. 
As I thought it through I heard his muffled voice.
"Please can we talk?" I decided to agree and opened my window. 
"What is it?" I said very hesitant. My voice was lightly shaking from fear. 
"I want to say I'm sorry. I treated you terribly when I was mad."
"You're sorry? But it was my fault?" He shook his head. 
"No. It was mine. I overreacted. I just really like you, I don't want Lotor to ever have you. Pidge told me it was just a kiss anyways" 
"It was a one sided kiss"
"What?"
"It was at the party." I said, he was climbing in through the window and sat down on the floor. I decided to join him. "I walked into a dark room. He locked me in there and wouldn't let me out. Then he started kissing me. I don't even remember how I escaped." I said trying to think back on the memory where I had almost blacked out. 
                          
Lances face looked just as guilty as I had felt. 
"I'm even more sorry now. I shouldn't have listened to him instead of you. I should've known there was more to it." I smiled. I was just glad he didn't hate me. 
"You're smile is amazing" He said. I smiled again. " I think I love you" He said. This shocked me. So soon? Wow. I mean I knew I felt it too, but did I want to say it back? 
"Ditto" he started laughing and I did as well. This was great. I was so happy.