Love...

                                    

                                          
Disclaimer/Authors note: this chapter ends with another cliffhanger because I think it is extremely funny and it gives me so more motivation to write.  Beware! You have been warned. 
__________________________________________________________
Inej POV
Oh no...that can't be good. He just said that he didn't regret it. Is he gonna admit that he was lying and that he really wished it had never happened.  Maybe he wished that she had stayed away for a few more days. Maybe he wished that she had never come back to Ketterdam at all. Maybe he was secretly happy when she left. 
                          
That thought was upsetting...fuck that, it was agony. She felt the thought pierce through her happiness like a rusted serrated blade. It left her feeling raw in the worst possible way. Inej felt her face drop into sadness. Well, if he was really that sick of her, he could shove it. In fact he could go crawl into the sewers and die. 
                          
Her face heated with anger. HOW DARE HE! SHE WAS AMAZING! He would be lucky if she even looked at him! AND HE WAS REJECTING HER! Wait, he hadn't even said anything....well if it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen. Her face relaxed into a expression of resignation. 

                          
Kaz who had paused to read her face was staring at her opened-mouthed. 
                          
"I'm wondering whether I should be offended that you don't have any faith in me." Kaz said looking her in the eyes, which was easy since she was still standing on his bed.
                          
"I have a lot of faith in you." Inej replied nonchalantly, picking nonexistent lint off of her shirt. He quickly snatched her hand from where it was on her shirt sleeve and laced their fingers together. She felt her head jerk back up to where she was once again meeting his gaze. 
                          
Kaz POV
She had no faith in him. He could tell by the way she was already putting her walls back up. Trying to fight off the feeling of rejection that he had never planned on bestowing upon her. And she was looking at him without any emotion crossing through her eyes. That was bullshit.
                          
"I'm wondering whether I should be offended that you don't have any faith in me." He told her, trying to gauge her expression for any hint of emotion. 
                          
She looked down at her shirt and said "I have a lot of faith in you." She started picking at her shirt sleeve. Kaz quickly and efficiently grabbed her hand and laced his gloved fingers through hers. Her head shot straight back up and her eyes locked with his own. 
                          
"Apparently not enough." Kaz said through gritted teeth. "Because if you had enough faith in me, you wouldn't look so...so resigned."
                          
"Well what do you want me to do, Kaz?" Inej spat at him, her emotions finally breaking free from the careful restraint that she had had on them. "Smile and wave as you kick my ass out the door. Because if you want that, you can go to hell."
                          
Did she really think that he was that cold? That he was just gonna kiss her and then tell her that he couldn't do the whole relationship thing. 
                          
"Why in the world would I kiss you and then reject you? It makes no sense!" He argued. Apparently the reasoning for the fight just got through that pretty head of hers and she looked at him sheepishly
                          
"So you're not telling me no?" Inej asked him quietly
                          
"Why in the world would I reject you?" Kaz said with a incredulous look on his face. "I haven't been moping because the economy deflated just a smidge! I've been moping because you left me! In a harbor!" 
                          
Inej immediately turned indignant,"well maybe if you had some basic courtesy and told me that you had found your gloves, I wouldn't have felt the need to leave so soon." She told him with a glare. Kaz drooped his head until it landed on her shoulder. No skin touching though.
                          
"Are you okay?" Inej asked after a moment of him just being there. 
                          
"The thing that I had to tell you was that you wanted me without armour. And Inej, I will try but I'm not sure I can...handle it." Kaz whispered to her. 
                          
Back to Inej POV
Oh my god. Her poor, sweet Kaz. He wasn't rejecting her. He thought she was going to reject him. Inej looked at his head on her shoulder for a minute before she tapped him, so he knew she wanted him to look at her. 
                          
He raised his head and stared into her eyes as she said "Kaz, I can't ask more of you than to just try. If I did, it would be unfair to you and to myself. Because I know you would never ask more of me than to try. Surprisingly enough, not all relationships have to be physical Kaz." 
                          
He was just staring. She thought about poking him in the face, but decided against it considering what they were talking about. She unlaced her fingers from his and went to snap them. But before she could move to snap, he had her hand back in his and he was looking at her even more intently than before. 
                          
He slowly cocked his head and one of his eyes kinda squinched. Inej froze. Scheming face. That was his scheming face. She started to internally panic. Like full on meltdown, 'this is not a drill, I repeat not a drill' freak out mode. What could he be thinking? Hell, What could he be planning? Would she die? Would she have to climb? Would she have to climb and then would she die? 
                          
He still had his scheming face on when he spoke again. "Inej, how do you have a relationship that isn't physical? Wouldn't that just be a friendship?" She was slightly worried with this train of thought but she answered him anyway. 
                          
"No it would not be. Because feelings have to be involved."
                          
"Feelings are in friendships...I think." Where was he going with this?
                          
"Different feelings, Kaz."
                          
"How are they different?" Why did he still have his scheming face on. This did not bode well. 
                          
"Well it's love." Inej said with some reluctance, trying to see what Kaz was getting at. 
                          
"Don't you love your friends?" He asked her, still wearing his scheming face. 
                          
"Well yeah but it's a different kind of love." 
                          
"There are different kinds of love? How do they differ from each other?"
                          
"Well Kaz, you love your friends but you're not in love with them." Inej said with some exasperation. She wished he would just stop with the scheming face. 
                          
"Are you in love with me, Inej?" He asked her, while slowly uncocking his head, and he started looking at her with a lost expression on his face. 




                          
Authors note: dun dun duuun. Oops I'm a little shit, I know. But how fast did I get this chapter out? The very next day! And it's so much longer which I am grateful for!! This was fun to write, but I can't write them, without adding some sort of fight. Idk why *shrug*. It's just happens. Anyway, I hope you enjoy. Until next time, Peace ✌️