Kerris

                                    

                                          
FIRST UPDATE OF 2019!!!!


                          
*** ***
                          
            
                          
She couldn't have gotten out of that room any sooner.
                          
The dull, pounding ache in her head suddenly twisted into splitting pain, so great, so utterly overwhelming that she stumbled into the wall.
                          
Must get back... Lie down... Sleep...
                          
She'd never know how, but somehow she made it back to the dark relief of the bedroom she shared with her little brother.
                          
Beck.
                          
He was worried about her, she knew, though he was still unable to voice his concerns.
                          
And she was terrified, terrified she'd be next to go, terrified she'd leave him like their parents did, like Callum did, leave him all alone and trapped in his wordless prison.
                          
She fell onto the bed, icy fingers sliding beneath her hair to press at the tender spot behind her ear.
                          
She still had no idea how it had happened, thought the only logical explanation was somehow linked to her collapse in the grocery store.
                          
Except hadn't she woken up on her other side?
                          
She couldn't remember.
                          
Drop it. Leave it alone.
                          
She closed her eyes, unable to help the whimpers that escaped her lips.
                          
The pain was getting to be too much.
                          
Too much.
                          
She wanted the pain to end, for it all to end, and yet... she couldn't take the easy way out, like Callum had. She couldn't leave Beck.
                          
You'll do what you have to do.
                          
What she had to do?
                          
Unwillingly, the memory of Callum shooting himself in the head sprang to her mind, replaying over and over and over until she thought she was going to go crazy with the agony of it.
                          
Stop it, stop it, stop, I'll do what I have to do, I'll do anything.
                          
Almost immediately, the vision faded, the pain eased off.
                          
She opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling.
                          
Again there was that little part of her that couldn't help but wonder if she was losing her mind. All the blurred emotions, the devastating grief of losing her parents and Callum, the intruding thoughts that didn't seem to be her own.
                          
It'd be understandable, if she was. A lot had happened in the last year.
                          
And who knew what more what to come?



                          
******     







                          
Super short update, but that's to be expected since it's a different POV... Hopefully we'll have a longer update next week lol, if I'm feeling it (fingers crossed; I wrote probably 15-20 pages for the All Your Fault rewrite, so that's lit, but barely accomplished anything else this week, oops).



                          
Any of y'all got interesting stories about passing out? Back in my freshmen year of high school I think I passed out (so it's probably safe to say I DID pass out at least for a second or two) after I got body-slammed during an intense game of ultimate kickball. Doesn't get much more American-public-school than that, hahaha. 
                          
And this is yet another reason why I don't do the sports.




                          
Also, I'm still looking for reviews to put in the story description, so if you'd like to leave even just a few words in the comments, I'd love to credit you guys! Thank you so much!!!




                          
Have a great weekend!