Emotions

                                    

                                          

I've been told that we have the privilege to control our emotions — that we are much stronger than we credit ourselves to be. 
                          
So tell me why I am letting myself fall down this hole like a loop, every passing day. 
Tell me why some people decides they do not want to feel empty inside and drink away their night, just so they can finally have some peace in sleep. 
Tell me why they find comfort in being higher than the Empire State building. 
Tell me why our generation was taught to act on our anger and sadness in such trivial, helpless ways that only leads us deeper into the darkness. 
Tell me why we have thoughts of death when we've been adviced not to go there. 
Tell me why I stopped looking both ways before I cross the road because dear God, forgive me when I say that I do not mind going away too early. 
Tell me why we have become legends when we die at 27. 
Tell me why we don't know how to handle and treat heartbreak just the same way we treat PTSD. 
Tell me why there is no information about help when we are screaming so loud that even angels above hear our cries. 
Tell me why we let ourselves break when we have the upper hand in mendling our emotions. 
                          
Tell me. 
Are we all dying in despair? 
Do I have a life to live in anymore? When I feel so low on days like this. 
When I have a voice but I am told not to speak. 
When I love & love and was told not to. 
When I wait and was not seen. 
When I break and no one knows what to say anymore. 
When there is only silence in between dead laughters. 
Have I gone insignificant in this small World? 
Do I matter this small to you? 
                          
Tell me. 
Who am I supposed to live for? 
                          
— is