7

                                    

                                          
My head whipped around and I felt like collapsing. There he was. My brother. Shiro's hair was white and thinning and he no longer had the robotic Galra arm. He now had a stump and wrinkles on his face. He was holding himself up with a cane and one of his ears were missing. I felt fear drip into my veins as I realized how I must look to him. I was smaller and weaker than before, sickly pale, my hair went down to my waist and was disgustingly greasy. Not only that but my anger was causing me to go Galra with patches of purple fur, one yellow eye, fuzzy purple ears on my head, claws and bared fangs.
                          
Tears started to roll down his cheeks.
                          
"K-Keith..." He fell down on the ground and Matt let go of me, rushing to help the former leader back to his feet. I simply stared, then turned to Pidge again. 
                          
"Why didn't you tell me he was here?"
                          
"He just got here an hour before you did. I didn't know he would come!"
                          
I stayed silent for a moment before repeating my question. "Now tell me. What. Happened. To. Lance." Pidge continued staring at the ground. "Please tell me..." They looked up and met my eyes.
                          
"He killed himself."
                          
Those words hit me in the heart and I grabbed my chest, doubling over in pain. It hurt to breathe. My mind was filled with him. His silky voice went he spoke to me. His breathless laugh when trying to ease the tension between the group. His face filled with pain when he was caught in that explosion. His blushing face when he denied once again ever having a bonding moment with me. His smell, like vanilla and the ocean. His face. His blue eyes. His lips. His warm lips up against mine and the warmth of his hands on my waist. His pale face and blue eyes staring blankly up at the wall. The feeling of his cold, blue lips as I desperately tried to get that fluttery feeling I got when I kissed him again. 
                          
I never felt it.
                          
Heaving sobs made their way through my chest. I cried out in pain as I tried to get my breath back, only to fail. It hurts... Lance... Help... The pain started to go away and I looked up to see.. Him. There he was. The love of my life. He was watching me with pain in his bright blue eyes. I reached out to him, but he shook his head. He pointed to something behind me and I looked, seeing Jaxon. I glanced back at Lance and he nodded before disappearing. The pain in my chest came back and I realized what was going on. I was having a panic attack. I turned my head to look at Jax and let out a sob.
                          
"Jax.." His eyes widened and I realized this was the first time in the ten years I've known him that I've asked him for help. He rushed over to me and wrapped me in a hug that I felt myself relax in immediately. I closed my eyes and for the first time since Lance died I felt real happiness and bliss.
                          
Oh.
                          
I opened my eyes and stared at Jaxon in shock. That's what you meant. You were giving me your blessing to move on. Tears filled my eyes again and I hugged him back. Thank you, Lance.