Chapter 27: Truth

                                    

                                          
(Caroline's P.O.V.)
                          
My head was throbbing. It was a dull pain - the kind you get with the flu. Alas (hello, Shakespeare), it wasn't only my sinuses that hurt as hell. It was my entire head. I felt dizzy after awaking from a sleep I assumed lasted for a few hours. Why did I not feel cold like before? Strange... Looking around, I noticed an arm around my upper body and another one under my head.
                          
I inhaled a scent which was far too familiar and decisive to go unnoticed with all the others around me.
                          
"Tom!"  I exclaimed and sat up jerkily. 
                          
Oh, just a dream... Tom was never there. He never told me he loved me. Tears shot into my eyes, threatened to escape. I decided to hold them back this time, noticing my sudden outburst of emotions had woken Loki up. It was so strange how his name didn't make me puke anymore. Well, at least less than before. 
                          
He stared at me, looking tired and lifeless, before putting his hand over the one I was steadying myself on. He had to stop this, running daggers down and up my heart. These looks, like Tom's when he was asleep. All the hatred and the disgusts which usually marred his angular face was gone.
                          
This constant reminder that Loki, at least for a short time, had been Tom  - it hurt me.
                          
"My dear Caroline...."  He began, but I kept looking straightforward and refused to glance over my shoulder at him. "I am sorry for what I did. I am sorry for taking you here against your will, and I am most certainly sorry for touching you in this inappropriate way. I know I was behaving unacceptably and it shall never happen again. I promise."  
                          
My mood lit up as I took in his every word and instantly turned to him. What had caused this sudden change of heart? My hopes were already up before I could contain them, as this was surely too good to be true.
                          
"So you're taking me back home?"  I asked enthusiastically. His face fell at my conclusion and he sat up so that we were at eye level. Slowly shaking his head, he took my left hand in both his hands and explained:
                          
"I am afraid I can not. I can not lose you. You are far too precious and important to me, I could never leave you behind. I love you, Caroline. I, Loki, God of Mischief and Lies, fell for you. Harder than healthy for me. I will do everything, I will give you everything, but I will not send you back." 
                          
My brain told me I should cry in anger and sadness, but strangely, my heart was fluttering inside my chest, making me blush. Why was I happy because of his declaration of love? I felt disgusted by my reaction. This was anything but right. There was no way I was going to fall for his tricks and let him seduce my senses and my heart. But somehow, I felt almost reassured that he wouldn't bring me back. I felt like I would miss something  important.
                          
Standing up, I began to walk across the room and stretch my limbs. I stopped at the window and looked out, seeing that it was dawning outside.  When was the last time I had eaten? Man, was I hungry. How could I think of food in that moment? My entire mood was a roller coaster of emotions. As if it wanted to respond, my stomach growled loudly and I blushed as it was so quiet,  Loki had definitely heard it. 
                          
"Hungry, love?"  He said and I jumped from how near his voice was, just to feel his leather-and-metal-protected chest touching my back. Turning around, I walked past him and avoided any closeness. My nausea returned whenever he was too close. 
                          
This is the man who killed everyone you love. 
                          
To finally give an explanation, as it had been hinted at numerous times, Loki exuded a certain aura. Now, with hindsight, I know that the God of Mischief and Lies had something very alluring about him - it drew people closer, and made them overlook his many flaws. It was a masquerade, Loki once explained to me that it only worked on women, and that he once bargained with some kind of fertility-god to get this radiance. It made him almost irresistible, the more time one spend with him, the stronger it got.