1 | A HEART FOR A HEART

                                    

                                          
It was months since the last time I felt my own heart emotionally functioning. At this point, I wasn't sure I was even human. I watched as the person I now had to call my husband ruthlessly shoot the helpless man before me. He purposely did it in front of me, knowing that I despised his brutality. I looked down at my now blood-splattered dress in disgust. 
                          
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" I shouted at him, tears cascading down my face. I was unable to move as I looked at the lifeless body before me.
                          
"For every day you resist me, I take a life," he says. He then pointed his gun at me. 
                          
I knew he wouldn't shoot me, he couldn't. He knew who my father was and the consequences that would follow. But I too knew the power Taehyung held, and it was beyond me. I couldn't tell my father of the ways he treated me, it would only come to backfire on me in the end. 
                          
But all I could do was resist, knowing that Taehyung couldn't find it in him force himself on me. Because he what he truly wanted was for me to genuinely give in like I did when I chose to marry him. He knew that it would pain me more knowing that it was my choice. 
                          
There were nights where I would constantly question whether or not his frightening acts were worth enduring in trade for myself. 
                          
But tonight seemed to have pushed me over the edge. 
                          
I left the room in rage, his men following me as I stormed back to our bedroom. They guarded the door as I slammed it shut and made my way to the bathroom to get rid of all the blood. I couldn't bare the sight of blood. My hands shook uncontrollably as I shoved my clothes into the trash and got into the shower. 
                          
When I glanced down, I saw the blood flooding at my feet- reminding me of that night. 
                          
That night Jungkook barely made it out alive. 
                          
After my shower, I headed downstairs in hopes that I'd be able to go for a walk to clear my mind. But to my surprise, my brothers were seated across from Taehyung as they conversed about gang-related business. I hesitantly sat next to Taehyung, smiling as my brothers noted my presence.
                          
I had to pretend to be happy for all our sake. 
                          
"Ah, Ara how are you?" asks Namjoon.
                          
"Please tell us you're going to give us a nephew already," says Hoseok as he looks between Taehyung and I. He was hopeful that his son would finally have someone to play with and possibly take him off his hands. My nephew, Jungwoo, was quite the character and that only contributed to his troublesome behavior- just like Hoseok as a child. 
                          
I nodded my head at Namjoon. "I'm doing well," I lied with a forced smile. I then turned to Hoseok and shook my head, "Not anytime soon." 
                          
Hoseok then frowned. "Well you know that you need a heir soon. Every day that you lack one, your power is in the hands of everyone around you."
                          
Taehyung shouldn't have problems with that. He already had his own side pieces to begin with, and if one of them were to carry his child, I would be happy to raise them up in position. Anything was better than me having to give myself to Taehyung, the man I hated the most. 
                          
But by the looks of it, Taehyung wasn't about to let a bastard child rise up before his own wife's. He held himself up with pride, and if others knew that the child he had with one of his affairs was the only successor to his empire- he'd be crushed. 
                          
"I'm aware," replied Taehyung as he uneasily glanced at me. 
                          
Namjoon, Hoseok, and Taehyung then continued to confide with each other in business matters. I sat by and listened in, hoping to seek useful information for further use. Despite my brothers love for me, they underestimated me just as father did. It was only natural for men to undermine women, but that ended up being our advantage. 
                          
They spoke of future alliances and potential threats, all of which I absorbed for future convenience. 
                          
After nearly an hour of mapping out their next moves, Namjoon and Hoseok said their goodbyes, leaving Taehyung and I seated there. 
                          
"I bought you a gift," he lifted up a box and placed it on the table before us. 
                          
Taehyung tried winning me over with the most beautiful, expensive gifts and even more prettier of flowers. But I turned it all down, not even giving it any mind. None of it mattered to me, just like our forced-marriage of alliance. 
                          
"Open it," he insisted this time.
                          
I shook my head. "Just stop," I told him. When was he going to understand that I didn't want anything to do with him? Had I not made it clear throughout the several excruciating months of continuous defiance?
                          
"Just open it."
                          
Since he never told me to do so before, I opened it out of curiosity. 
                          
My heart practically sunk once I saw a candid photograph of Jungkook. This was recently taken, I was sure of it. He was wearing a hat and held his head down low as if he were trying to conceal his identity, he was surrounded by a bunch of trees. My baby, my poor baby. I took in his entire appearance; he was so skinny and pale, he looked more fragile than I've ever seen him. My heart ached for him, it ached even more knowing that I was useless. 
                          
Where was he? 
                          
My mind raced endlessly with questions.
                          
I turned to Taehyung who was leaning back against the couch, sipping his tea as he looked at me with amuse. He sat there all perfect and put together, hair styled and suit tailored, without a care in the world. Had he not cared that his very own brother was out there struggling? How could someone be so heartless. 
                          
Taehyung places the teacup aside. "I know you're probably wondering where he is. Don't try looking for him because you won't find him- he himself doesn't even know where he is," he told me. 
                          
I brushed my fingers over the photo of him, the only part of him I had left besides our memories engraved in my mind and heart. Everything I physically had of him was thrown away. This was like a breath of fresh air after having been suffocated by everyone around me. 
                          
Taehyung then yanked the photo from my hands and ripped it up. My heart had torn apart just as the photos did, slowly falling to the floor. And just like that, I felt as though I had lost him once more. The feeling of when we were ripped apart from one another washed over me, completely engulfing me in a wave of sadness.
                          
I dropped to my knees to rummage for all the pieces. 
                          
"Will you just stop?" He shouted, grabbing my arm and pulling me up until I stood before him- tears rolling down my face and all. Taehyung's eyes were narrowed and his brows were scrunched up, displaying signs of bitterness. "What does he have that I don't?"
                          
"A heart," I spat before running upstairs.