Payment

                                    

                                          
Chad's POV
                          
"So as payment for all the help I have given to you to get your revenge on your brother. I get the queen correct?" I ask Ruffio. We were all in the meeting room in the basement of the EVC, Ruffio, Myself, Yavin, Radcliffe, Claudia, and Uma.
                          
"Of course old buddy old pal." Ruffio replied.
                          
"So then why did you say that you would rule together and she would be yours?"
                          
"You fool if I had told her that she would belong to you she would have never agreed. Plus we would not have to most powerful weapon in the world."
                          
"Which is?" Claudia asked.
                          
"I'm surrounded by Idiots. Don't you remember what Ren said."
                          
"Oh that she is the most powerful Jed..." Radcliffe started to say but Ruffio slapped him upside his head.
                          
"You idiot you can't tell the audience the whole plot line. There not gonna read the rest of the book if you do that."
                          
"Sorry boss."
                          
"Can you guys get back to the story please." The author said.
                          
"Whose that?" Rudy asked.
                          
"That's the author you idiot."Ruffio replies.
                          
"She hasn't written in a long time." Claudia stated.
                          
"Claudia shut up, or you'll be gone in the next chapter." The author said.
                          
"Yeah boss." Claudia replied.
                          
"Aye where were we again boss?" Ruffio ask.
                          
"You fools your in Act two scene 28 top of page 2." The author answered annoyed.
                          
"Ah right ahem." Ruffio clears his throat. "Not like she has any use to me. Other than tormenting Harry." Ruffio laughs.
                          
"I mean who does she think she is, that girl has tangled with the wrong man. No one says no to Chad." I say.
                          
"Darn right." Radcliffe says.
                          
"Diss missed, rejected publicly humiliated, why it's more than I can bear."
                          
"More beer?"Yavin says.
                          
"What's the use nothing helps. I'm discreased."
                          
"Who you never." Claudia says.
                          
"You've got to pull your self together Chad." Radcliffe says.
                          
Radcliffe: 
Gosh, it disturbs me to see you Chadwick 
Looking so down in the dumps
Every guy here'd love to be you, Chadwick !
Even when taking your lumps
There's no man in town asadmired as you
You're everyone's favorite guy
Everyone's awed and inspired by you
And it's not very hard to see why
                          
Radcliffe jumps on top of the table and continues to sing. 
                          
No one's slick as Chadwick 
No one's quick as Chadwick 
No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Chadwick 
For there's no man in town half as manly
                          
Claudia and Uma:
Perfect, a pure paragon!
                          
Uma and Cluadia say as they roll their eyes.
                          
Radcliffe and the boys:
You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley
And they'll tell you whose team they'd prefer to be on
                          
Radcliffe:
Who plays darts like Chadwick?
Who breaks hearts like Chadwick?
Who's much more than the sum of his parts like Chadwick?
                          
Chad:
As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating!
                          
(ALL)
My, what a guy, that Chadwick !
                          
Chad:
I needed encouragement
Thank you, Radcliffe
                          
Radcliffe and I high five. 
                          
Radcliffe :
Well, there's no one as easy to bolster as you!
                          
Radcliffe hugs me. 
                          
Too much?
                          
Chad:
...Yep
                          
(ALL):
No one fights like Chadwick 
Douses lights like Chadwick
                          
Radcliffe:
In a wrestling match, nobody bites like Chadwick
                          
Chad:
When I hunt, I sneak up with my quiver
And beasts of the field say a prayer
First, I carefully aim for the liver
Then I shoot from behind
                          
Radcliffe:
Is that fair?
                          
Chad:
I don't care
                          
(ALL)
No one hits like Chadwick 
Matches wits like Chadwick
                          
Chad:
In a spitting match, nobody spits like Chadwick
                          
Chad:
I'm especially good at expectorating!
                          
(Spits)
                          
(ALL)
Ten points for Chadwick !
                          
Chad:
When I was a lad, I ate four dozen eggs
Every morning to help me get large
And now that I'm grown, I eat five dozen eggs
So I'm roughly the size of a barge!
                          
Radcliffe and the boys
Who has brains like Chadwick ?
Entertains like Chadwick ?
                          
Chad:
Who can make up these endless refrains like Chadwick?
I use antlers in all of my decorating
                          
(ALL)
Say it again
Who's a man among men?
Who's the super success?
Don't you know? Can't you guess?
Ask his fans and his five hangers-on
There's just one guy in town
Who's got all of it down...
                          
Radcliffe:
And his name's C-H-A... D...
I believe there's another D...
It just occurred to me that I'm illiterate
And I've never actually had to spell it out loud before...
                          
(ALL)
Chadwick!
                          
"Alright now that's that horrible song and dance is over let's go get the little lady." Ruffio said getting up from the table. I followed behind him to the room where he kept her. Ruffio opened the door and she that awful pirate with my girl.