Remembering

                                    

                                          
LENA POV
                          
"I'm treating so please sit my darling." My mother said as she invited me to lunch on the waterfront. I had to admit it was nice of her even if I felt bad leaving my wife with all the kids today. Noah had been acting up lately, along with baby Stef and I knew I'd come home to both kids having red behinds if they didn't start behaving better. Maybe it was something in the water but if she did spank them hopefully it would be the first and last time. Especially for our son.
                          
"Mom I have money." I said taking my seat as I saw the Pacific crashing on the waves which I loved from the window. It was really nice how my mother and I were getting along and how she was apart of our lives. Regardless of our past we put it behind us for the sake of Noah and our family. Truth was we all needed each other in this life and always would.
                          
"And so do I. I wanted to take you out and next time it will be you and Stef." Glancing to her she smiled at me as I stared deep in her eyes. Yes her and my wife were getting along but they didn't really hang out. Not one on one anyway. "Yes honey Stef and I do talk on the phone incase you didn't know and we have had good conversations. Many."
                          
"Really? You and Stef talk on the phone for more then 2 minutes?"
                          
"Yes and she's actually very bright.  I'm  not saying she's IV league material but she's not dumb. She's actually very sweet once you get passed everything else. The tattoos and her language I mean. Speaking of which honey we all know you love Stef so can you please remove that horrid tattoo from your neck."
                          
"Mom IV league is not for everyone and no I won't remove it. I have every intention of keeping it where it is and I got it for my wife and it's staying. No one else has a problem with it."
                          
"It just doesn't look very lady like. I mean  you have that at work showing?"
                          
"Mom."
                          
"Ok I will stop. Anyway tell me what's going on? How is that job?"
                          
"It's actually good and I really enjoy it. It's as close as I will ever get to being in a classroom."
                          
"Well I am glad the opportunity opened up for you. You always loved teaching and expanding your brain and traveling. Goodness you use to love traveling. Maybe one day you can travel again honey."
                          
"Yeah probably not anytime soon." I said taking a sip of my pellegrino. "Stef and I have so much to take care of and it's expensive."
                          
"Yes I know that but maybe when Noah is older and all the kids leave the home you can pick it up again. It was such a passion of yours honey. To teach abroad as well. Remember you did it that one summer?"
                          
"Yeah I remember mom. In Pais."
                          
"Yes. Do you still remember how to speak French?"
                          
"I do. Yeah."
                          
"Well I just don't want you to forget that part of your life and that part of yourself. It's very easy to lose yourself in family and commitments. Even in terms of your partner."
                          
"I'm not lost mom. We just have other priorities."
                          
"I get it honey but don't forget about your dreams. Please. I know prison limited your options a bit but many of the dreams you had are still possible. Don't dismiss them sweetheart. Ever."
                          
Feeling a lump form in my throat I had not thought about traveling since before I married Noah's father. It was eaiser to forget that dream and the many others dreams I had. By this point they seemed unattainable.
                          
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STEF POV
                          
"I don't want to hear another word from you two! If I do those tails are mine again Noah Adams Foster and Stefanie Marie Adams Foster! Both of you!" I said putting my belt back on and putting my hair back for these two were about to make me lose my shit.  Normally they were well behaved but lately they were both losing their minds and I had no idea why. None. It had been years since I spanked my granddaughter and I never ever had spanked Noah in life. But they both deserved it after I caught them writing on the wall knowing they weren't allowed to do that and then having nerve to keep doing it  talking back to me.
                          
"Maybe they ate something bad. Or maybe it's the water." Frankie said doing her homework in the kitchen as I took a seat beside her drinking coffee and mama Rose poured another cup herself.
                          
"Yeah well neither of them will make it to their next birthday if they don't knock that shit off. Writing on the fucking wall like they are outside doing fucking graffitti."
                          
"Kids will be kids babygirl. And they all have their moments."
                          
"They will have no moments left. None. Zero. Normally they act fine especially Noah but he has lost his mind as well. Did he really think he could talk back to me and do that shit? Really? I mean he looked right in my eyes and just did it. I have every right to beat his ass again."
                          
"I could have told him that's a horrible idea talking back to you. My butt still hurts. I mean for the record." Frankie said.
                          
"Good. I'm glad it does. Keeps your memory fresh incase you want to try that shit again with me. Go in my room and finish your work."
                          
"Ok. Um can I work outside in the back?" She asked rather timidly as I took another sip of my coffee eyeballing her. "Nevermind your room is fine mama." Running off I let out a sigh seeing Mama Rose glance at me as I put my feet up on the chair. God did I want a cigarette and didn't want to tell Lena I started up again.
                          
"Tired?"
                          
"These kids. It's no joke mama. I thought when they were little it was hard but it's harder now if I'm honest. Sure Lena and I have a handle on it but we have our moments where it makes us insane and where we wonder if we are doing  a good job."
                          
"Of course that's to be expected baby. Parenting as you know is not easy especially when other things come to play. Our past you know. Believe me you are doing an amazing job. You both are. Kids have their moments and I suspect your little granddaughter is acting up because she knows they are moving soon. That's not easy for her or for Noah."
                          
"Yeah I know that's what it is. She's been sleeping in the bed with us everynight ya know. Callie's worried and has been trying to spend more time with her but she screams her head off when she's not with me."
                          
"She loves you baby. Kids get attached to certain people. They do and she was always attached to you even as a little baby. Just like you and Callie have a bond, you and your granddaughter do as well. Just take it slow and play it by ear. It will be ok. All of it will. I have always told you that honey."
                          
"You have and it's been true."
                          
" It is. Things will get easier with Frankie too. I know it's been tough with everything but with time it will be ok. The same with Jude, and the same with Mariana."
                          
"Yeah mama about Mariana you know um," I began but lowered my voice signicantly. "Peaches wants her back."
                          
"What?" She asked suprised as I looked to my bedroom door making sure it was closed. It was but we still spoke very quietly at the risk of one of the babies hearing us.
                          
"Yeah. She wants to raise her with Mike since they are married now."
                          
"What about Judy?" she whispered.
                          
"I don't know mama. I'm supposed to hang out with her tomorrow. Far as I know he hasn't even told her yet. Or if  he has she has not mentioned it which is unlike her because we are pretty close."
                          
"Jesus. Poor Judy. I mean yes I am happy Peaches is doing better but this is just messy shit." She whispered. "Very messy."
                          
"Yeah I know mama. I know and I can't imagine it getting any better."