and with the deafening mind of hers came a sorrow she submitted to. it was as if she was submerged underwater for years of her life, solely being focused on how everything was amplified beneath the surface. it was all very loud, similar to the volum...
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october 10th
blue. how else could she describe the morbid sensation she could not help but discern? with the little sleep she gained she had a dream. one where time seemed to extend itself longer than reality went on for. one where she was gone.
no, not gone gone, but gone from the house. gone from the town. gone from the life she was living. but that's why she hated sleeping a lot of the time. when she dreamed, she was always strong enough to do what she never imagined herself to pursue when she opened her eyes.
perhaps her mind was telling her something when she shut her eyes. could she leave? could she start over? could she escape him? yes, absolutely. yet, the question was: would she?
the routine fell into place like it had for hundreds of previous days. the kiss goodbye—although today it entailed an "i'm sorry"—right before his car traveled down the street and out of town. she cleaned up the kitchen from breakfast, but taking more time due to only being able to use one hand, and soon was ready and out the door needing to be away from the house that only caused her tension.
she made her way to the market, needing a bottle of pain relievers and a few other items. she stuffed the list in the pocket of her hoodie and held the reusable bags between her arm and lightly bruised ribs. the leaves scattered amongst the pavement were a mixture of dead browns, fiery orange, and the rare green making its way to yellow. the sky was clear, not a cloud in sight to kiss her imagination as shapes to make out.
on the ground was dried up gum flattened into black spots, and twigs and the previously mentioned leaves. it was a heavenly contrast to the sky a shade of blue as beautiful and familiar as the color of her favorite sweater. with each step she took, she wondered if another shoe had walked the exact same places her feet were touching. she imagined someone walking their dog at seven in the morning with a cheery step, and warm home to return to. or maybe a child had walked the same path as her on the way to or from school with a backpack full of messy writing and playful erasers in the shape of food or any other object but an eraser. people's simple lives seemed the most beautiful to her because it had just been so long since she had known such a thing.
her bad hand was buried in the soft pocket of her hoodie, and her eyes were cast downward to avoid meeting anyone else's. the inside of her cheeks and bottom lip were raw from the constant nipping her teeth conducted on the sensitive skin, but she seemed numb to the discomfort it brought because she had done so since her childhood.
red. the color of cars passing by, the same color that forced them to stop at the intersections to allow her to cross. it was a shade that represented the love she thought she possessed and the passion he had for the destruction he caused. it was what flashed in his vision when he felt his anger rise, and red was what she had to witness dripping from her skin at times.
the market had people scattered within each aisle, blissfully carrying out the simple job of buying every day items. she pushed a cart through the produce section, using her forearm instead of her injured hand. she pulled out her list and went to grab fresh vegetables and fruits, finding it difficult to hold open the produce bag while placing the actual produce in them. yet she managed and gently placed them into her cart before moving along down the rows of color.
she collided with a cart as she went to round the corner of an aisle. without looking up at the person directing it she apologized like she had done something awful. harry stood behind the opposite cart and had a small smile on his face.
"no worries at all," his voice was familiar, so she glanced up and saw the man from the overlook and felt somewhat at ease. "fancy seeing you here."
with every ounce of energy she could bring herself to exert, she smiled. it was refreshing for her to meet someone who made her want to do so. "in this small town it was bound to happen."
he chuckled, and caught a quick glance at the wrist brace that adorned her hand, but he didn't let his grin falter despite knowing what the cause of that injury may have been. he wondered what excuse she would give if he were to ask her about it. perhaps the good, old "i slipped out of the shower" or maybe it would have been something about just being a klutz. he had used both more than enough times to fool an outside person. but he knew he couldn't question her about something when he hadn't even learned her name.
"so, i've caught the name of the car mechanic, the cashier, the owner of the coffee shop, and i've only met them once. met you twice and haven't learned yours yet." he saw her shoulders loosen up, and the reclusive demeanor collapse.
"i'm sorry," she shook her head as if it rid her of feeling bad for not offering upper name at the time he had done so. "i'm celine."
between their handshake, he took notice of the dainty ring upon her finger and realized she may feel a legal obligation to endure what brought the bruises on her neck that were now fading into yellow hues. he was a stranger, but he felt so terribly connected to her with the subtleties of what she was going through.
purple. harry was sporting the rich shade through his button-up when their carts crashed and he learned celine's name. it was what you were given when mixing blue and red. it was what celine was left with to cover up the truth about the seemingly happy relationship she had found herself stuck in while her skin was decorated in the hues that were tender to the touch. it was a color harry was far too familiar with, and seeing celine trapped with the variations brought the familiarity back.
