Behind the Camera

                                    

                                          
by: bambam1a
                          
Summary:
                          
Niall is quite famous youtuber. He makes singing videos, just some random videos and vlogs, where it seems like he's very happy person. But everything isn't like it seems on the computer screen. 
Niall moves to another school in London and Harry Styles happens to attend the same school. This Harry guy is a huge fan of Niall and for the first time he sees what's behind the scenes.
                          
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“Byee guys, I'll see ya soon!” Niall ended his video with a big smile on his face. He took his camera and sighed deeply. He loved filming and editing, just making videos was his way to relax, but sometimes it was even too hard to keep a smile on his face for a whole video. He started editing the video immediately, but he probably wouldn't upload it until tomorrow which is Friday. He always uploads a new video every Friday and Tuesday. Every Tuesday he uploads a vlog and every Friday either a singing video or some random video. 
“Niall!” his mums shout suddenly startled him.
“What?!” 
“You should go to bed, you have school tomorrow!” Niall rolled his eyes and didn't answer. Sure it was already 11pm but he didn't want to go to sleep. He didn't want to wake up tomorrow and go to new school.
                          
He lived in Ireland his whole childhood, but when he turned sixteen they moved to London. His mum got a new job, that's why. His life in Ireland hadn't been the best. He was kinda loud and always laughing and many people didn't like it. He was bullied but not badly. He had many friends around him and they helped him. He was happy kid and almost never sad. Then he moved to London and the school wasn't as accepting as his old school. He didn't get any friends, but he was okay with it. But then the bullying started and with no friends it was way harder to cope than in Ireland with his friends. He was openly gay and he had just started making videos on youtube so the bullies called him all bad names for gay. Queer, Faggot, Fag, Homo. They called him names every day and slammed him on the lockers. Though he still wasn't so badly bullied as some people were. They didn't beat him up or anything, just made him doubt himself very very badly with their words and he also had some bruises on his arms because of the lockers he was slammed to. But the last straw was when over a year ago his dad died. It left him broken and he didn't know what to do. He was lost for months and he ended up with bloodied wrists and red eyes. Everything just became too much for him that he didn't know how to cope anymore.
                          
Making videos also did help him. He didn't stop making videos, not once. He didn't share his life with the fans either, they didn't have to know how he didn't have any friends or that his dad had just died. He had over 500,000 subscribers who gave him so nice comments, sometimes there were some people who were asking if he was okay. They noticed that Niall wasn't okay and it made him try harder to look okay. Not once was he okay, but happy he was. When he was in his room alone, making videos, editing or playing guitar. Then he was happy, genuinely happy. The fans were supportive and told him amazing things even they didn't know a thing about his life. 
But he did not keep the fans too far away, he sometimes told some things that had happened on the street, if he had seen something funny or if he had had amazing time with his family back in Ireland. 
He didn't know why some people loved him and his videos so much. He had so amazing comments on his every video that it made him just try and live, but then was the hater comments. He tried to ignore them, but sometimes they stung more than his razor blade on his wrist.
                          
With a deep sigh Niall shut his computer and stood up. He stretched and started changing to his pajama pants and t-shirt, he took a hoodie and put it on as well. He always wore a long sleeved shirts and hoodies when he wasn't sleeping because he couldn't risk it that anyone would see his cuts. His mom really could just burst in so Niall wanted to make sure that nothing was too exposed. 
He brushed his teeth before climbing in his bed. He threw the hoodie on the floor and pulled the cover over him. He didn't want to go to school tomorrow, it made him uncomfortable. But he was glad that he didn't have to go to his old school anymore and there was this small sparkle of hope that maybe, just maybe, everything would turn out fine.