WILL I OR WILL I NOT

                                    

                                          
I stood infront of the mirror for what seemed to me like ages. Should i or should i not wear the Niqab( A veil put over one's face for religious purpose) ? . My brain quickly drifted over the pros and cons :
                          
PROS
*you'll manage to be the muslim girl you've wanted to for some time
*you'll avoid alot of unnecessary glances from strangers 
*you can wear as much make up as you want without causing harm to the society 
....
                          
CONS 
*you'll definitely lose over half of your social life 
*forget about any attention you attained earlier in school 
*you'll probably get nick names to last you a life time
... 
                          
I decided to butt in and break free the debate my mind was so willingly holding against itself . "Ok zahra how about we try baby steps? We can wear the Niqab to all social places but we can keep a free face in all my formal appointments. " I could feel apart of my conscious against it forming me out as some form of hypocrite ; willing to be the Niqabi to some people and good old zahra to others. I cared less though , so i brushed the thought off quick and rushed downstairs to grab some snacks before i left for my first period .
                          
**          **     **
                          
I was in the middle of a killer calculation which had me in between the feeling of ; struggling to finish it because apparently my dad was paying fees and investing in me so I'd rather not let my old man down or cutting this damn paper into a million pieces and run out of class like there was no tommorow. Torn between my emotions messing with me and a struggle to finish my sum i was distracted. 
                          
A new student walked in , he looked nervous by the suggestions his body language gave . His blue eyes seemed not to focus darting from one side of the room to the other , his lips were somewhat mumbling so i guessed it was probably a dua for Allah to save him from all the "New kid drama" , he looked neatly dressed in a white Qamis (an Islamic attire for muslim men) and a perfectly placed Imamah( a piece of garment put on the head by muslim men) on his head you'd think he took hours fixing it.
                          
I was about to conclude my judgement when.. YA ALLAH! .I couldnt believe he had convos on! Those shoes had me tripping since they came into existence. When i saw our teacher Mr.Ibrahim stand next to him it hit me I've been staring at the boy! So much that there was nothing about his appearance i missed . I looked away quickly and muttered under my breath "Ya Allah forgive me " . 
                          
"Asalamu Alekum,may i have you attention everyone? We have a new member so kindly let him introduce himself" then he patted on the boys shoulder as though to encourage him 
                          
"Asalmu Aleikum , my name is Abas Ahmed and am happy to join this institute. I hope we learn and work well together. Shukran."
                          
I concluded two things : 
*His defiantly Arab. His accent and composure sold him off.
*His a straightforward kinda a guy which i like. 
                          
"Zahra you've been looking at him for quite some time . Do you know him?"
My best friend Merjem asked me looking amused.