14 - Decisions

                                    

                                          
On Monday morning, I pulled into the parking lot of the medical faculty and made my way into the classroom. I was a little excited, my life has been a very happy one lately, so I was nearly always excited for no particular reason at all. I was a little earlier than usual, but it didn't matter. I made myself comfortable at my desk and tried to catch up on some reading.
                          
"Ai'Beam, how was your weekend?" I looked away from my notes at Pha as he placed his bag on his chosen desk.
                          
"Great." I smiled widely as proof. "How was yours?"
                          
"Great. I saw something interesting at the club on Saturday."
                          
"Yeah? What?" I couldn't help but wonder.
                          
"There was this guy, right? He was talking to three girls, more like the girls were flirting with him. I don't know what those girls saw in him because he didn't look as good as me. Anyway, the interesting thing that happened is that while the girls were flirting with him, another guy walks over, mercilessly pushing the girls aside and then he shamelessly kissed the other guy. I've never seen anyone act so jealous." Pha looked up at the ceiling and sighed dramatically before turning to meet my narrowed eyes. I ignored my flaming cheeks as I responded to his teasing.
                          
"How come you were at that club? I called you to make sure we won't run into each other."
                          
"We didn't follow you, if that's what you're thinking, and you didn't tell us which club you were going to."
                          
"You would have followed me anyway, that's why I didn't tell you and who is we?" Now I don't even know why I bothered calling them to make sure they didn't get any teasing material on me because they still did. I don't remember seeing them there though. Maybe it's because I dragged Forth out of there after I realized the scene I'd created.
                          
"Yeah, Ai'Kit was there too. The first club we went to was dull, so we changed locations and we walked in on that amazing scene. Everything is going well with you two it seems." I looked away from his imploring eyes. Sometimes I wonder why they encouraged me to date Forth even though they were the first and only people I confided in about my arranged marriage. What were they hoping I'd gain from this? The only thing I see myself gaining in the end is pain from a broken heart, a self-inflicted broken heart at that. "Beam..." I turned to look at my friend again when he paused after saying my name. This time it was I imploring him with my eyes. "What are you going to do about your relationship with Forth?"
                          
"What do you mean what am I going to do?" I knew where he was going with his question, but I decided I'd rather not make assumptions.
                          
"You know what I mean. Are you going to talk to your father about your relationship with Forth?" 
                          
"I...I haven't decided." Pha shook his head at my answer, sighing heavily before turning away from me to pull out a book from his backpack. It may have just been me, but I thought he seemed a little disappointed. Not in me, I hope.
                          
Kit had the same story as Pha when he walked into the classroom moments later. I didn't give him a chance to start because I didn't want to hear it again.
                          
"So..." I looked up at Kit, wondering what he was going to say even though I'd already stopped him from teasing me. "Are you going to stay with Forth?" I groaned. Those two friends of mine were even wondering the same things.
                          
"Did you two talk about me on Saturday? Ai'Pha was asking me the same thing just now."
                          
"We both know how you are when it comes to your father and we don't need to talk about you to have the same concerns. what answer did you give Ai'Pha?" Kit wasn't backing down.
                          
"He hasn't decided." Ai'Pha answered for me.
                          
"You love him. What is there to decide? If you want us to, we will go with you to talk to your father." After Kit's offer, I begun to get an inkling of why my friends encouraged me to date Forth.
                          
"I..."
                          
"Ai'Beam..." Kit cut me off before I could finish my sentence. "You don't have to decide right now but you should decide soon so you don't hurt yourself and Forth."
                          
I stared blankly as the professor walked into the classroom and got ready to start his lecture. During most of the class I kept lapsing into my own thoughts, trying to decide how I can go about being with Forth without breaking my promise to my late mum.