xxii. strawberries and cigarettes

                                    

                                          
chapter 
↳ twenty two
moodboard
↳ always taste like you
disclaimer 
↳ i don't want this chapter to make cigarettes sound good or romantic or whatever, but it is part of both of my characters. anyways, smoking is bad for you.
                          
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"Sirius Orion Black you had better have an excellent explanation as to why we are up on a Saturday morning before sunrise." Millie was quite grumpy in the morning.
                          
It was one of the many things Sirius liked about her.
                          
She was also clingy. Perhaps it was the fact that her mind hadn't quite awoken yet, or that the morning breeze was forcing her to stay close to the only other source of heat. Either way, Sirius liked it. 
                          
He liked her hands, and how they slid into his like perfect little puzzle pieces. As cheesy as it felt to be this fascinated by anything and everything Millie did, Sirius didn't think he would trade this feeling for anything else. Right now, in that middle light between the moon and the sun, Millie looked a certain type of beautiful he hadn't witnessed yet. In her rush, she hadn't applied any makeup at all, and Sirius found himself staring at her lips, wondering what they tasted like without any balm or gloss.
                          
Millie, catching him staring, stuck her tongue out at him. "Tell me what we're doing, you loser."
                          
There was no bite to her words. In fact, if Sirius was correct, he almost thought he heard a bit of excitement behind her threats (which weren't really threats at all.)
                          
"We are going to the forest, my love. We have to hurry before the groundskeeper sees us."
                          
Millie huffed and huddled closer to Sirius. "If we get points deducted this is your fault. Slytherin can't take the fall for such a dumb decision."
                          
"You wound me," Sirius drawled, placing his palm over his chest. "Now, do you trust me?"
                          
Millie pouted. "Are you going to make me close my eyes?"
                          
"It's not a surprise if you don't!"
                          
Millie obliged. Sirius held her hand and pulled her through the trees, making sure not to let her trip on any roots. Finally, he reached a clearing where he had set up a picnic blanket. 
                          
He stopped. Seeing Millie standing there, eyes closed, arms crossed over her chest, and a pout evident on her pale lips, made Sirius feel suddenly giddy somewhere in his stomach.  
                          
He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Millie's. 
                          
Millie giggled against his mouth, and a certain fire curled in Sirius' chest. It felt a bit like pride, and a lot like love. 
                          
"Sirius," she whined, "can I open my eyes now?"
                          
"Huh? Oh, yeah."
                          
He still felt vulnerable around her. After all, there weren't many people on this earth that Sirius Black would set up a picnic for. Especially in the middle of the night in the Forbidden Forest. There were times when he waited with halted breath for Millie to chide or berate him. Not that she ever had before, but he still had trauma and memories that were hard to erase.
                          
He still needed approval from the ones he cared about. He needed assurance that he wasn't pathetic. That he wasn't rushing into this blindly. He needed Millie to like this, and him, so much.
                          
"Have you heard a word I've been saying?" Millie's voice flooded his ears. The touch of her hands against the back of his neck sent him into a sense of calm. 
                          
He took a deep breath. "No..?"
                          
"I love it," Millie repeated for him. "Thank you."
                          
Sirius let out a sigh of relief and grabbed Millie's hand again. "Sit. I've got fruit and cigarettes and chocolate frogs."
                          
"Perfect," Millie sat down on the scratchy blanket and pulled a bowl of strawberries out of the basket. "Oh! D'you know what we can do?"
                          
Before Sirius could ask, she grabbed the chocolate frogs and unwrapped them. She trapped them between two bowls and picked up her wand. "Watch this."
                          
With a flame on the tip of her wand, she melted the chocolate. "Now," she said, grabbing a strawberry and twirling it into the chocolate. "We've got chocolate-covered strawberries."
                          
She held it out for Sirius to try. The action drew heat to his neck, but he took a bite of the fruit anyway. "Woah. These are good."
                          
"Have you never had them before?" Millie had found the cigarettes, and was digging for a lighter.
                          
Sirius didn't want to remind her that she had just conjured fire with her wand. "I don't think so. Mrs. Potter likes healthier foods, you know?"
                          
Millie took a bite of the same strawberry, and laughed. 
                          
Sirius swallowed and pretended that he wasn't even slightly affected. But how couldn't he be affected by anything Millie did and was? Merlin, even now, as she paid him no attention and opted for blowing smoke towards the woods, he thought there was really nothing else he wanted in this moment. 
                          
Just Millie. Only Millie.
                          
Before he could really stop himself, he cupped her face and drew it towards his own. Millie met his eager lips with a smile, and Sirius could taste the smoke and chocolate still on her tongue. He sighed.
                          
He closed his eyes and let himself just feel. Just feel the way Millie's hands felt against his chest, and the heat of her lips, and the softness of her hair. 
                          
Sirius wanted to breathe her in and never breathe out.
                          
He couldn't describe it if he wanted to. He couldn't make sense of how loved Millie made him feel. Kissing her made him feel like he was important, just for being himself. Her touch sent him to heaven and back; made him forget his sins.
                          
The realization hit him much like a hex, just as Millie pressed a kiss to his neck.
                          
He loved her.
                          
-
                          
THE END
                          
there may be an epilogue. 
there may not.
                          
also i entered this story in the wattys lol. i don't really know what that means but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯