emotional baggage {bucky}

                                    

                                          
💙

                          
over the past two days, bucky has been acting weird around me
                          
like yesterday, when i went to the kitchen to get some food, he was there
                          
i smiled at him as he dodged my eye contact and left in a rush
                          
i thought nothing of it, until today
                          
i was walking into the living room to join the rest of the team, when i hear laughter
                          
i walk closer and see bucky looking at the ground with red cheeks as they all looked at him
                          
"what are you laughing at?" i ask, confused
                          
they all stop laughing as bucky practically runs to his room
                          
i sit down where he was, which is between steve and tony on the couch
                          
they are all now looking at me
                          
"what?" i ask, raising an eyebrow
                          
"she is clueless" wanda says, throwing her hands in the air
                          
"about what?" i ask, now getting annoyed that they aren't telling me
                          
"well bucky, sorta has a crush on you" steve says
                          
i feel my cheeks heat up as i turn my attention to steve
                          
"really?"
                          
he nods, smiling "yeah"
                          
i feel my cheeks grow darker as i realize that everyone is staring at me
                          
i take steve's hand and lead him away from everyone
                          
"can you tell him that i like him too?" i ask
                          
he nods "yeah, but he won't believe me"
                          
"i can stand to the side if you need me then" i offer
                          
he nods "that should work"
                          
i follow him to bucky's room and stand out of sight, against the wall, as steve knocks on the door
                          
i see the door open and steve smiling "hey buck"
                          
i hear bucky sigh "hey steve"
                          
"listen, um i might have told y/n that you like her" steve says, sheepishly
                          
"you did what?" bucky practically screams
                          
"buck calm down-" steve tries, but bucky cuts him off
                          
"you want me to calm down when you told y/n that i like her? she's probably going to try and stay away from me now and hate me and act weird around me. she'll never look at me the same way. steve, why'd you tell her?"
                          
i can hear the panic in bucky's voice
                          
"because you are a good man, buck. plus she likes you too" steve says
                          
"no, i'm a monster and no, you're just tricking me. there is no way that she would ever like me"
                          
steve turns towards me "i told you he wouldn't believe me"
                          
i smile and walk over to steve
                          
i hear bucky gasp as i come into his view
                          
i hug steve as he leaves with a big smile on his face
                          
i turn towards bucky "can i come in?"
                          
he nods with wide eyes, letting me walk past him and into his room
                          
i stand and look around briefly before meeting his icy blue eyes
                          
"i like you too, bucky" i say
                          
he shakes his head "no way. there is no way that you would like me"
                          
i frown, slightly
                          
"why would you think that?" i ask
                          
"i'm a monster, y/n. i've killed more people than i can count. i can't control my anger sometimes. i can't get the past out of my head. and i have trouble trusting people"
                          
i take a step closer to him "but you trust me, right?"
                          
he nods
                          
"you are not a monster, bucky. you didn't kill those people, the winter soldier did"
                          
he just looks at me, silently
                          
i take a step forward, now only a foot away from him
                          
"you really thought i wouldn't want to date you or even like you because you come with some emotional baggage?" i ask

                          
he nods, slowly, looking at the floor
                          
i put my finger under his chin and tilt his face upwards
                          
i look into his eyes
                          
i see pain and confusion and longing
                          
"if you let me, i promise to help you with your anger issues, your ptsd, and your trust issues. if you let me, i'll show you what it's like to be in a relationship and be happy" i pause and glance at his lips before looking back into his eyes "if you let me, i really want to kiss you"
                          
he smiles and leans in, placing his soft lips on mine
                          
the kiss was infatuating and long overdue
                          
when we pull away, he smiles at me
                          
"i'll let you do all of those things, as long as you promise to never leave my side" he whispers
                          
i smile "i promise"
                          
💙