Chapter 32 - Bethany POV

                                    

                                          
It's been a month since I've heard from Joe, and today was the iHeart radio music awards. I couldn't even fathom it. He promised he would be here today and a part of me wants to believe that he will be in the crowd with my brother but I know he won't.

                          
"Call him one more time Beth," I say to myself and picking up my cell phone, hoping that something would change. That maybe just maybe he would pick up.
                          
"please joe." I plead into nothing, it was sad how desperate I was, truly. 
                          
"you have been blocked by this number," An automated voice tells me and I drop my phone and drop to the ground. Today was truly the first meltdown I've had in regards to Joe. Shawn had been really great with keeping my mind off everything.
                          
I choke back another sob, this couldn't be happening. Had I done something wrong? Was it Shawn? God, there were so many questions left unanswered and I couldn't really comprehend it. All I knew that right now I was on the floor, bawling, dressed in Joe's MTV shirt, trying not stop myself from falling apart more than I already have. 
                          
"Hey, Beth the-oh my god" I hear Shawn say and immediately I feel his arms wrapped around me, holding me close and I lean into him, trying to stop crying.
                          
"Joe blocked me," I say quietly and Shawn lets out a sigh.
                          
"You do not need him. Joe Sugg is nothing but trash if his method of dealing with his life is by blocking you out. That's bullshit." He says and makes me look at him, "Now let's stop crying, and let's get you to the hair and makeup team and your dress is stunning I just saw it. We have an insane performance to kill today and an award to take home." Shawn says, using his thumb to wipe away my tears and I smile, nodding and Shawn helps me up and leads me to the makeup artist. I was immediately grateful for this boy, my best friend. 
                          
     
                          
Shawn was right, I looked and felt like a completely different person. My dark hair was put into ringlets and in a half up elegant bun and my make up was beautiful, My dress was a deep v neck with a ribbon tied and flowy, ending mid-calf, it was stunning and also probably the most expensive dress I'd ever own.
                          
Shawn came out of his room in a normal suit, with a red tie to match mine. 
                          
"Handsome," I say and Shawn smiles in gratitude and leads me to the car where we go to the venue of the awards somewhere in Hollywood. 
                          
The car ride is silent and honestly, I was rehearsing the dance in my head, making sure I hadn't forgotten anything. My issue with Joe this morning really put me off my game a little bit but I couldn't worry about this, I needed to focus. 
                          
"Alright, Showtime," Shawn says and immediately the car door is opened for him and he steps out, his hand holding mine and he helps me out. It was crazy being here, being around so many famous people. Shawn dragged me through until we got to the red carpet and I immediately spot my brother and Zoe, taking photos.
                          
"Alfie!" I yell and his head snaps and he and Zoe quickly walk towards me. Alfie engulfs me in his arms and spins me around.
                          
"Beth I have missed you!" Alfie says I nod, feeling emotional all over again. I did miss my brother a lot.
                          
"Okay, I'm sorry but we gotta move or else some paparazzi might get angry," Shawn says apologetically and we nod, together, Shawn and I stand in front of the paparazzi, making serious faces and smiling ones at them, our arms around each other as we took them and moved inside again, fully knowing that we needed to move backstage. 
                          
we were ushered off the carpet and backstage where we would be performing.
                          
"God, dancing in this dress was such a bad idea," I mumble to myself as Shawn and I do a few stretches and he rolls his eyes, and tosses me my spandex.
                          
"Yeah well, blame Andrew," Shawn says and I throw my head back and laugh. The awards have been going on for about forty-five minutes since Shawn and I entered backstage and it was almost our time to shine. 
                          
"Now, please welcome, Shawn Mendes performing his new single, released tonight, Lost in Japan!" The host, I think it was James Cordon says into the microphone. I immediately bolt to the other side of the stage, careful not to trip in my heels I would be dancing in tonight. A month of practice for this. 
                          
the beginning beats open and  I walk out, pretending to be confused and Shawn follows. immediately the people watching clap excitedly and honestly if it wasn't for the fact that this was an award show, there would be screaming girls everywhere.
                          
I end up in front of him and I smile, his lapel microphone taped to his cheek as he begins to sing and we do our dance. How Shawn was able to do it, I don't know but he did a really good job of maintaining the energy and keeping up with me. 
                          
"I can't seem to get you off my mind," He says and I'm off the stage by the time he sits on the edge off the stage and the crowd goes off. He bows quickly and runs to where I am and we hug, and he spins me around.
                          
"Incredibly Shawny boy!" I say excitedly and he nods.
                          
"You were spectacular. Okay let's go, we gotta make it to our seats." He says, and we run out, and immediately to our seats near the front, panting. Alfie is sat next to us and gives me a side hug and I can barely thank him, I needed water and I felt like I was gonna throw up from how dry my throat was.
                          
"Alright, and the winner for best music video is Shawn Mendes!" Gal Gadot says, being the person to announce the award for tonight and Shawn stands up, still panting and I stand up and hug him. I immediately try to sit back down but he doesn't let me, pulling me up onto the stage with him.
                          
"Alright" Shawn breathes out and the crowd laughs.
                          
"Sorry guys that dance took a lot out of us," Shawn adds breathless and I nod, taking another deep breath. the crowd chuckles, allowing us a second.
                          
"Okay, I think I'm okay. I just wanna thank the fans who voted, truly amazing. I also wanna thank my team and lastly I wanna thank Bethany Deyes over here." he says and I smile, he wraps his arm around me and I smile shyly.
                          
"I might have won this but I only won it because of Bethany, she's incredibly talented and such an amazing and kind soul. SO this award isn't mine, It's Bethany's. My music video would've been complete crap without her effort and patience due to my lack of danceability. thank you but give it up for Bethany" He says and passes me the award and I wrap my arms around him, hugging him tightly. 
                          
"Say something." gal Gadot says and I nod, stepping in front of the microphone, my arm still wrapped around Shawn,
                          
"Wow I can't breathe but this is insane. This also really is not my award but thank you, Shawn. Thank you to my family, my brother Alfie's eyes who pushed me to dance. And then you to everyone at home, you guys crushed it." I say and we walk off stage, the crowds cheering for us and I was honestly truly happy and amazed. 
                          


                          
AN: Long chapter lol! Look at the video for a little bit of a reference for what I imagined the dance to look like. In my head it was a little more graceful and like coupley, but leave it to your imagination!