Chapter 3: That feeling

                                    

                                          
Today was the day of the concert, and the boys had been working their butts off throughout the week.It would be simply called lying to say that the boys weren't nervous, everyone of their heart's would beat louder at the mention of the concert. But they knew that once they were on the stage they would love every single second without a doubt.
                          
The boys were currently getting their hair and makeup done while trying to memorise the choreography as they would have a new dance break in their song. In situations like this bts usually use their members to talk about any trouble they may have had or worries. But this concert had come so quick that they didn't even have the time to get more than a couple of hours sleep each day. 
                          
Seokjin knew that he should have spoken to at least one of the members, he knew that he should have at least tried. Deep down inside he thought that he was just over reacting and that he shouldn't tell anyone. But it kept nipping him in the back of his mind every time he thought about a specific someone. He could have at least told his closest friend Hoseok who had been with him throughout everything, who had seen him in his worst and best states. The concert has also just been another weight to carry throughout the storm, don't get him wrong, he absolutely loved his ARMYS with all his heart. But all of the boys were so unprepared for this concert that it just meant a whole load of practicing, a whole load of dieting, and whole load of stress.....lots of stress.
                          
And once again Seokjin has the same feeling now that he did a couple of days ago when he thought about it. It was like déjà vu, and this feeling was eating him alive; a mixture of anxiety, curiosity, discomfort, and loneliness had merged into one. It haunted him whenever his mind was at peace. It haunted him whenever Seokjin least expected it. This feeling he had at the bottom of his stomach was not a good one, and for some reason Seokjin was believing the things it said.
                          
Seokjin didn't even realise he was a trembling mess until his noona asked him a question.
                          
" Seokjin-ah, are you okay?" She looked at him with so much worry and concern.
                          
The question pulled Seokjin out of his dark thoughts and tense up once he heard his name.
                          
"O-oh y-yeah I'm fine just a little n-nervous." He sweetly smiled through the mirror while mentally cursing at himself for stuttering.
                          
"Don't worry, you'll be fine once you get up there, just enjoy yourself."She replied while continuing to straighten his hair.
                          
'Yeah, everything will be fine, it's just your mind overthinking' Seokjin didn't know how many times he had to tell himself this to try and keep his cool, but in reality he felt like breaking down and crying. But he had to be a strong hyung for his dongsaengs, what type of hyung would he be to break down crying while having a tantrum in the middle of the room?
He chuckled at the thought.
                          
"There you go!" His noona once again dragged Seokjin out of his thoughts.
                          
He looked at his reflection in the mirror and forced a smile like he always did. He had to admit that learning drama in school really did help in situations like this, everyone fell for it, the only ones that didn't were his other members due to them living together for so long.
                          
He had the job as a " visual " in the band, at first he thought it would be easy because all he had to do was be himself.....right? 
                          
Of course not, it changed him. He was forced to be narcissistic, he wasn't like that, in the end he just got so used to acting narcissistic that it made him become self conscious. He was now constantly conscious about how he looked, how his hair was styled, how much make up he had on. Why couldn't he just be himself? Why couldn't he just go out there In his jeans and a baggy top? 
                          
All the tightly fitted clothing really annoyed Jin, in fact he hated it. Not only did it make him even more self conscious than he already was, but the bit that pained him more was that he had to act like he was the most beautiful person in the world (A/N He is!). Originally he hated people who were narcissistic, and now having to act like he was to the people he loved the most, pained him so much.
                          
The choker that was around his neck should've just strangled him there and then;considering how tight it was. The pants might as-well have just been leggings, and the top was way too tight that it could split from him just moving his broad shoulders to walk. Jin was suffocating in his clothes, he was suffocating in his idol-life, right now it felt like he could just collapse to lack of sleep...but of course he had a concert..and his manager would most probably force him to go on even did collapse.
                          
"Okay boys get ready you'll be on in 20!" The tall man shouted.
                          
"Where is Yoongi-hyung?" Jimin questioned with his eyebrows furrowed.
                          
"Umm, I'm not sure But i think he went into the lounge area." Namjoon stated.
                          
And there it was, that feeling, it was clawing at him, crawling up his spine and around his neck. Seokjin's heart beat increased as he quickly replied with an "Ok I'll go get him."
                          
Seokjin walked through the brightly lit hallway passing through all the busy workers rushing around. He tried to calm himself down by taking a couple of deep breaths and tried to shake that feeling off. That feeling that gave him goosebumps, that made his hairs on his arms stuck up, that made his legs wobble and made his arms tremble.
                          
He walked passed the last door before stopping  in front of the one labelled "private lounge".
                          
He didn't bother to knock, the adrenaline was enough to give him confidence. He placed his shaky hand on the stone cold metal, sending a slight shiver through his body.
                          
"3......2.......1......" on one he barged through the wooden frame, only to see the thing that he feared the most, that feeling that he had was speaking the truth, that feeling that he feared to be true...was.
                          
This image in front of him, this image, was the one he feared the most....
                          
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Thank you for reading this chapter, I hope that you enjoyed it!💗
                          
I will probably update on Sunday but it may be a little late as this one was updated earlier.
                          
Please don't be afraid to comment or vote!💕
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What do you think Jin saw?
                          
How do you think the concert will go?