3

                                    

                                          
edited
                          
january 8, 2016
                          
i stare at my friend from across the circle, his expression matching mine. 
                          
"no, we can't." i speak, my throat getting dry from my anxiety. 
                          
"yeah, we can't." he agrees shaking his head. he pushes himself off the ground and comes to me. "c'mon sabrina." i start to get up as well, just wanting to get out of here.
                          
"you guys have to do it, it's the rules." jared speaks up, everyone agreeing with him. 
                          
"seriously, j?" i don't give him time to answer as i drag shawn out of the room. 
                          
i feel bad  for just walking out, but they should all know better. maybe i'm overreacting but it's a big deal to shawn and i. we're just friends and we plan on keeping it this way. we talked about us getting married when we were little, but as we got older, we realized that we don't want to risk our friendship falling apart. our new years kisses are just that, kisses.
                          
"let's go home, sab." shawn says intertwining our fingers, walking out to the car. "that was kind of awkward." he finally speaks up seeing as the whole car ride back to my house was dead silent.
                          
"yeah they should know better." i say rolling my eyes walking up the driveway. "you staying?" i ask shawn turning around to face him.
                          
"of course." he says with a half smile. 
                          
we make our way up the stairs and into my room. once we enter i take off my heels wincing at the after math. i stroll over to my dresser grabbing a sports bra and sweats, also getting a pair of boxers for shawn. i lay the clothes down on my bed and start to unzip my dress. well at least try, i don't know how i zipped it up all the way in the first place.
                          
"shawn?"
                          
"need help?" how does he always know what i want before i say it?
                          
"mhm." i say still struggling to grab the zipper. 
                          
he pads across the room to where i'm standing, moving my hands away from the zipper making room for his own. his cold hands rub against my bare skin creating goosebumps. when he's done unzipping, his hands travel up my arms to find the straps of my dress. it creates a pool at my feet leaving me in my panties. i couldn't wear a bra with dress so i started to shiver at how cold i was. 
                          
i turn around to face shawn covering my chest. i walk over to my clothes, putting them on. 
                          
we both go to get under the comforter on my bed. he holds his arm out reaching for me to come cuddle with him. i oblige with a cheeky smile. my hands reach up to turn off my lamp, leaving me and shawn in the dark. 
                          
i can tell he's not asleep by the way he's breathing. he's been quiet ever since the party. 
                          
"shawn?"
                          
"hmm?" he hums into the pillow. 
                          
"what are you thinking about?" 
                          
"nothing?" he lies. 
                          
"liar." he releases a small chuckle, holding onto me tighter.
                          
"tell me." he doesn't respond which causes me to press more. "please."
                          
"it's nothing sabrina. go to bed." 
                          
"no." i protest, huffing like a child. i know he's rolling his eyes right about now. 
                          
"goodnight." he says untangling himself from me, rolling over to face the opposite side of the bed. i whine at the sudden emptiness. 
                          
"shawn, no. okay, i'll stop if you turn back around." i plead clinging onto him.