Chapter 5: Sin

                                    

                                          
Roseline Angelina Black.
                          
Pain.
                          
It can be evil and it can be an angel. Pain is what we all carry , a little or a lot deep in our hearts. And it ultimately decides which way we mould our lives. Some of us don't take it so well, become numb and meaningless shells of their original selves.They let themselves darken with the pain, shutting everyone out and isolate themselves. It's understandable, knowing not everyone appreciates opening up to people and revealing their true side, more like their true pained hearts. We all have drawn our curtains , shading ourselves from the outer world to cradle our agony in our chests, gathering and wrapping in in glittery, shiny papers or fake plastered smiles, sometimes a deep hatred for everyone.
                          
That's exactly what I want to do today, on the seventh day of my honeymoon as I watch my husband spin his love in the ocean , through the window. Her wet hair sticks to her face and a genuine smile graces her lips as they stand in the water , waist deep. The sun sets behind them, casting all shades of reds and yellows in the sky. I wrap my arms around my shoulders as I turn away from the window, no longer able to watch them with the growing hatred in my heart.
                          
No, I will not be like them. I won't let the pain consume and morph me into someone I'm not. I will not let the hatred take control of my life. I have no right to hate or judge her, I am the second woman here. She loved him first... or at least he loved her back. Seating myself on my lonely bed, I think back to the day I came here.
                          
We're staying at a beautiful cabin Adonis owns in Hawaii. I was esctatic when I found we were coming here, I had never seen the ocean before. Even though it was Scarlet's dream to come here, I was happy to tag along.
                          
On my own honeymoon...
                          
You would think I would be a mess judging that I loved and got married to a man who doesn't love me? Well I admit, it's very hard. To wake up every morning and watch them kiss and be so much in love and the hardest part is going to bed alone, knowing full well your husband is sleeping with a woman just down the hall. But I try to conceal it as much as I humanly can. 
                          
Deciding I should make diunner to distract myself from my depressing thoughts, I pull my hair up in a bun as I walk into the kitchen. Scarlet and me, well we're kind of friends. I've grown to like that girl since we came here in the last seven days. She's extremely nice, easy going and friendly. The biggest thing is her kindness, she was willing to sacrifice her relationship with Adonis for our marriage but I convinced her not to do so since I'm perfectly fine with our arrangment. Which I'm not but she doesn't need to know that.
                          
I put of some music as I start cooking Lasagne. My mother always sucked at cooking, so my father took it upon himself to cook us delicious foods everyday. I got my love for cooking from my father. To the world he was the perfect millionaire , running a good business and all formal. But at home he was the greatest cook, the lamest joke teller and the best father. 
                          
I remember the countless times , we had cooked together, singing on top of our lungs to lame songs.
                          
I miss those days...
                          
I'm brought out of my thoughts when Scarlet walks into the cabin through the back door. "Hi Rose." She greets cheerily from across the living room. "I just came to fetch some beer." she adds as she walks over to the bar. Her sheer red beach dress showing off her beautiful curves
                          
"Hi Scarlet. " I smile genuinely. She's a sweet girl ." Great. Going somewhere tonight?" I ask nonchalantly , keeping my voice void of any emotion or interest while my heart contracts like a balloon in my chest.
                          
Everytime...
                          
I watch as she grabs two beers from the bar and stops halfway through the hall. "No actually, the guys next door are having a bonfire, We decided to join them. You should come too , they're cool." She looks at me with a hopeful expression.