The Heart Dies a Slow Death

                                    

                                          
"The heart dies a slow death, shedding each hope like leaves until one day there are none.  No hopes.  Nothing remains."  -Chiyo Sakamoto
                          
On the outside, I was as hard as a rock, pulling the training of my years of being the princess of the most powerful pack in the entire world as well as being the daughter of the fiercest warrior who wasn't a Lycan to the surface, but on the inside, I was shaking like a leaf. 
                          
I suppressed my wolf so he wouldn't sense that I was probably more powerful than him, even though he was full blooded it seemed and I was only half, he probably slacked on his training thinking his blood gave everyone around him an upper hand.  
                          
My mother singlehandedly killed Draven, one of the most powerful half Lycans of her time, and she was just a regular female alpha wolf at one point in time, not the fearless Elite warrior she was this day. 
                          
I felt the butterflies erupt in my stomach the moment that our eyes connected, his eyes furrowing in confusion, but the red head by his side broke through that haze I assumed, as they continued back to their once harsh glaze as he had looked at me before. 
                          
I wondered what I must've looked like to him: a plain jane wolf, not even powerful enough to be considered a pack member per my cover at the school, obviously not of a high rank since I was hiding my true strengths and then there was the fact of my hair color. 
                          
I was born with my hair in its black as night color, but most people assumed it was unnatural, but I didn't care.  If they thought it was natural then they'd assume I was an Oracle: a wolf who had the gift of the Moon Goddess to see the future through encrypted visions that she bestowed upon you. 
                          
It had been almost a hundred years since the last Oracle had been chosen, and she had died a little while before I was born.  That meant that it was half past time for there to be another Oracle already, since only one could be alive at a time.  The Moon Goddess didn't want too many wolves knowing the future, only a select few of her choosing and only at specific times. 
                          
I didn't believe I was an Oracle, I had guessed I was a few times after reading about them: hair like a raven's, porcelain skin, eyes dripping with moonlight and the power of sight. 
                          
I had a few of those qualities, but I didn't know if I had the power of the sight, although my dreams, or more accurately nightmares, could be construed as the sight. 
                          
I was so caught up in my thoughts that I hadn't stopped to wonder if this Lycan who was supposed to be my mate held the powers that my father and aunt held: reading minds.  My father said that gifts of Lycans could be passed down generationally, but I cursed myself for not shielding my thoughts and for being so careless.
                          
Thankfully, his demeanor hadn't changed, and I wondered what was going on when I saw my mate having a staring match with the wolf behind me, Vincent.  He had a snarl on his face and I remembered that Vincent's hand was still on my lower back in a protective manner.  Of course he would be protective, I was his soon to be queen!
                          
It would be treason to not want to protect me, but my mate wouldn't know this.  And was he seriously getting territorial after he had already marked some other wolf and possibly completed the mating process already? We were only seventeen for Goddess' sakes!  I assumed everyone else at this school was of high school age as well, we shouldn't be making and mating until we were at least eighteen!
                          
I heard the girl beside my mate clear her throat and that seemed to break him out of his staring contest with my glorified baby sitter and turned his gaze on me which set my stomach churning and made me want to run for the hills clutching my stomach and barfing up my lunch. 
                          
"Welcome to Bellator Academy.  I am the president of student affairs here, Andrei Miroslav, let me be the first to welcome one of our newest students.  Oh and don't be worried.  There are lots of unranked wolves here, no need to feel inferior to all of us, whether its the truth or not!" he laughed a little too hard at his own joke and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. 
                          
He must've known that we were mates considering the fact that the air was electric between us, I couldn't take my eyes off of his light colored brown eyes, and the girl on his arm seemed to know it, as well. 
                          
He went to shake my hand and as soon as they made contact, the sparks erupted and I recoiled my hand fast, not wanting to draw too much attention to the fact that he was most definitely my mate, and I needed an escape plan, fast. 
                          
"Hi, I'm Alexandra Ardan, I'm Andrei's mate.  So nice to meet you," she said, extending her hand and I gulped back a snarl as I went to shake her hand, anticipating the wallowing pity party that would occur once I got back to the castle, my every muscle tensing in my body hearing her say what was mine was hers, even as I noticed their matching marks on their necks, it still hurt like hell. 
                          
I wished I'd never met him, never touched him.  The fact that he'd just marked someone else without waiting for his true mate sickened me to my very core, he was so young, and there I was, so naive to think that my mate would save himself for me.  Oh, how wrong I had been. 
                          
I became aware of a presence behind me nudging me, and I realized it was Vincent who was probably reminding me to introduce myself. 
                          
I cleared my throat and prepared myself mentally not to embarrass myself in front of him, wanting to appear strong and cool headed. 
                          
"I'm Vina Rochester, my parents are prospects for becoming members of Lupus Bellator.  It is so nice to meet you both," I said with downcast eyes, not used to being submissive in conversations, my wolf always domineering those lower than me to never meet my eyes, and now here I was having to restrain myself. 
                          
"Are you from America?" I heard the girl on my mate's arm, Alexandra, ask me. 
                          
"Yes, we recently moved here from the Arctic Delta Pack," I said, using the lie that my parents had told me.  Since my grandmother and grandfather were the current Alpha and Luna there, they would easily be able to validate my false claims if anyone got suspicious. 
                          
"Well, welcome to Bellator Academy.  Let us know if you need anything," the girl said, and I honestly might have liked her if she hadn't clung herself onto my true mate.  I said thank you and was about to turn to leave when my mate said something else to me. 
                          
"Yes, lovely to meet you Miss Rochester.  I look forward to the rest of the school year with you," he said, and I got a weird chilling feeling up my spine as he had an almost predatory look in his eyes.  It made me particularly uneasy and this time when Vincent led me outside of school property, I let him, the feeling of his hand against my back an anchor holding me to the earth. 
                          
But as soon as we were outside, I finally let the dam break, and the tears flowed freely.