Untitled Part 14

                                    

                                          
Gemma's POV
                          


                          
So shit has been fucked up for me over the last month. I never meant for any of this to go this far. Well, that's not totally true. That shitbag asshole deserved every bit of what I threw at him. I don't feel remorse for that. 

 What I feel bad about, is how I let the guilt get to me the way it did. It was eating me up. I felt guilty for everything that he did to me, and it all came to a head. 

 When I was at the train bridge, I was done feeling that way. I never expected to see Corey of all people to show up. He approached me like he normally would, even as I sat with a razor blade in my hand. He sat and talked to me, and was nice. He didn't judge me once, and held on to me as I cried. I feel weird that I let him see me that way. I felt so broken and torn. 

 Seeing Sid almost broke my heart entirely when he showed up. I never felt so bad for hurting him, and I'd never seen him like that either. 

 So now, I am standing in front of Corey's house, waiting for him to answer, as Sid sits in the car waiting. I want to just run from the door, and not look back. It's easier that letting someone into my pain. The door opened, and Corey stood looking surprised. 

 "Gemma. Come in." He said moving out of the way. I walked past him, and followed him to his living room. We sat down facing each other. "Are you ok?" 

 "Yes. No. Fuck, I have no idea to be honest." I sighed. His bright blue eyes looked at me sadly, as be nodded. "Look, this shit isn't easy for me at all Corey. I don't get close to people, and you already know way too much about me now." I sighed again.

 "Gemma, you really don't have to tell me anything. I don't expect you to." He smiled softly. 

 "No. It's fine. It is. Look, that last time I was robbed, what you and Sid figured out, it did happen. He had a gun to my head. I couldn't do anything." I said it all in a whisper. I looked at him, and he has the look of sadness, and shock. 

 "Goddamm. I know this doesn't mean shit, but I'm so sorry. I am. Fuck." He said, running his hand through his hair. "So, this guy from the night I kept you from finishing him off, is it...him?" 

 "This is the part of the story that's really fucked up Corey. I did something I'm not proud of." I feel sick. I do. No turning back now. 

 "What do you mean? You didn't do anything wrong." He was confused. 

 "I did. When that happened, I focused on his face. I memorized everything about his face. I wasn't forgetting. After I healed up, I kept thinking about his face. I knew him from somewhere. Then I saw him at the bar one night. I acted like I didnt know him. Then I put my plan into play." I looked at him. 

 "What...what does that mean?" He said, his eyebrows scrunched in at me. 

 "I followed him. Knew where he lived, worked, shit like that. Then he came back to the bar. I flirted with him. He asked me out repeatedly. I turned him down each time, and knew it upset him. Then I saw him at the store that night. He followed me home. Then I sat and waited." I told him. 

 "What!? Are you for fucking real?!" He looked almost horrified. 

 "Corey, I told Sid the same thing. He took something I can never get back. I couldn't let it go. I can't forget him, and I was l making sure he didn't ever forget me. He left the hospital the next morning when he found out who I was. He didn't check out. He up and left. His jaw wired shut even." I said. 

 Corey sat in silence, and stared at me. He let out a deep breath. "Goddamn Gemma. That's fucked up. Not gonna lie. But, I can't say I don't blame you a bit. I don't. What happened today? Why were you there?" He asked softly. 

 "You know why. The guilt." I whispered wiping my eyes, not looking at him. I felt more tears coming and wasn't able to stop them. I looked down, trying to stop crying. I saw his hand reach over and grab mine, making me look up at him. 

 "Don't do that. You did what you had to do, Gemma. Please, don't blame yourself. You can't. You will hold on to it forever of you don't let it go." He said, squeezing my hand gently before letting it go. "So, now what? What about if he comes back. I have a feeling he will. I'm scared for you."

 Oh shit. This was the part I didn't want him knowing. "I mean, he came after you twice. What's stopping him this time?" He asked me. I felt my face turn red, and I shifted in my seat. 

 "Um. Yeah. About that. He's not coming back. I..fuck!" I leaned back in the chair, avoiding his gaze. 

 "Did you talk to your uncle?" He asked. 

 "Fuck. Corey, I asked him to make the guy leave and not come back. He's already gone before it could happen." I may puke. 

 "Holy fuck girl! Does Mikey know?" He asked. 

 "No. I've never asked Mikey to do anything like that, and he knew it was something. We have that don't ask, don't tell, kinda thing. Mikey can never know the truth. Just like the rest of the guys can't. I'm fucking begging you to not tell anyone." I said desperately. 

 "Today never happened, Gemma. None of it. If it were brought up to me, I'd deny it. I'm serious. You don't have to beg me, ok? I just want you to be ok." He said seriously. 

 I felt myself relax, and let out a breath I was holding. "Thank you. I really honestly mean that. Thank you for everything you've done." 

 "Don't thank me either. I don't mind. I really don't. I'm just glad I got there. Both times." He smiled. "And I may be terrified of you, just so you know." We both laughed. 

 "Not some of my finer moments." I smiled. 

 "Yeah, well, pretty sure we are even in that catagory." He laughed. I sent Sid a text, telling him to come in. I looked up at Corey.

 "Sidney is on his way in." I laughed. 

 "Uh oh. Sidney, huh?" He laughed, as we heard the door shut, Sid came in and smiled at us. He sat next to me, holding my hand. 

 "So, what now?" Sid asked me. 

 "Now we move on." I said. They both nodded. 

 "Jim's having everyone over. You guys coming by?" Corey asked us. 

 "I think so." I smiled. 

 Later that night, we got to Jim's, and headed out back. "Gemma!" They all yelled out, making me laugh. Alex practically tackled me into a hug. 

 "Move dick!" I heard as Jim shoved Alex out of the way. "How are ya!" Jim laughed as he hugged me. 

 "Better. Thanks." I smiled. Alex grinned at me. 

 "Piggy back ride?" He smiled. I giggled and jumped on his back, as he ran around the yard with me. He dropped me into Sid's lap, as I smiled at him. 

 "Told you they missed you." He smiled at me. I kissed him quick, leaning against him. 

 "One month before the big day. You two ready?" Mick asked us. 

 "Yeah. Once he got over me saying no to the petting zoo at the reception." I grinned at Sid. He flipped me off and laughed. 

 "I like llama's. Fun hater." Sid smiled. The guys were laughing at us. 

 We hung out that night, and had a good time. I still feel, I dunno, off I guess you could say. I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. I feel like I need to run away from everyone in my life. Sid included. I just don't understand it at all. Since I got home from the hospital, I have felt like that. Also, I've noticed an increase in anxiety attacks. I feel so not normal, and it scares me. 

 I was still dealing with all of these symptoms two weeks after everything happened at the train bridge. I finally told Sid about it, who took me to the doctor. I wasn't happy about going. After being scanned, and poked and prodded, we had an answer. I had a brain injury, not a severe one, but it was easily missed when I went to the hospital that night. While there is no specific treatment for it, they gave me anti depressants, and some anxiety meds. 

 About one week after starting the medications, I felt amazingly better. I couldn't believe the difference. Sid noticed it too, and I could tell he was happy that I felt better. I felt like I could deal with life again. Which is good, considering we get married next weekend. 

 After lots of back and forth, we decided on a small private ceremony, and a rather large reception right afterwords. How large is the reception? Almost 200 people. Yeah. Those are Sid's friends. I was more worried about him wearing a tux to be honest. I can't believe I agreed to that large of a reception. 

 So, this leads me to today, one week before we get married. The guys are taking Sid out, and I was hanging at home, finishing the final touches on the room we've been working on. I had finished the painting the other day, and I was hanging the trim. 

 I had finished the trim, and decided to hang up some paintings and pictures that were in frames. I didn't realize how into it I had gotten, and looked at the time. Shit it was already two in the morning. I can't believe Sid isn't home yet. I shut off all the lights, and got into bed. I tried calling Sid, and it went right to voicemail. That's weird. He always answers when I call him. I drifted off to sleep, but kept waking up. I looked at the clock, seeing it was now ten in the morning. Sid's still not in bed. What the fuck!

 I went out to the living room, no Sid. I tried calling, voicemail. What in the fuck is he doing? I headed down to the shop, and didn't find him there either. I'm starting to panic, because this is so unlike him. I pulled up the guys Twitter accounts, looking for any clues. My heart sank. 

 Someone went to the strip club, and there were numerous photos of him and women that had hardly any clothing on. He had his hand on their waists, and it looked like he was nuzzling one of their necks. What in the fuck! I don't care if he's at the strip club, but he doesn't need to have his hands on these bitches! I flipped through and saw his own Twitter account and was beyond pissed. I have no idea who this girl is, but he's kissing her on the fucking mouth, and she's not making him at all. The caption said "Having the time of my life." Fuck this. 

 I called Alex, asking where Sid was. Alex said he didn't know, check with Chris. I called him, he told me to check with Jim. Jim had me check with Corey. 

 "Corey, where's Sid?" I asked clearly annoyed at this point. 

 "Uh, hey Gemma. He's um here. Look, I'll bring him home in a bit." Corey is hiding something. 

 "Why is that Corey?" I asked. I was already heading to his house, like I wasn't far at all.

 "He's still asleep. Long night, ya know?" He laughed. It was a nervous laugh. 

 "Open the door Corey, or I will put my Fucking foot through it." I said, pulling in his driveway. I heard him go silent, and then his door opened, he stepped out. He had been up, as he was fresh out of the shower, and his hair was wet. 

 I got out and walked up to him. "Where is he?" I said. He avoided my eyes. 

 "Gemma. Don't. Please don't go in there." He said, holding on to my arms gently. I have such a sick feeling in my stomach. 

 "Who is in there with him Corey?" I asked. He closed his eyes, then opened them. 

 "Gemma, it's not what you think. Nothing happened, I made 100 percent sure it didn't." He said seriously.

 "Who is in there Corey?" I said slowly. 

 "Gemma, listen to me now. Do not go batshit, alright?" He said. I moved around him and he caught me by my waist. "Gemma, listen first, then I let go. Can you do that?" 

 "Fucking talk dude." I snarled. He held on to me and turned me to face him. 

 "Its Amanda." I fucking froze, as my heart stopped. I felt tears fall from my eyes. "She and Sid ONLY talked last night. She hung out with us, and Sid slept on the floor. I didn't let the door shut, and didn't fall asleep until I knew they both were." He told me. 

 "Why is that cunt hanging out with Sid." I demanded. 

 "She ran into him, he was pretty wasted, and they had some shit that they needed to talk about. Do not go fucking shit up, please. She's pregnant. You can't hit her. Understand?" He asked me. I nodded, and he let go of me. I walked past him, feeling him hot on my heals, as I stopped at the spare bedroom. He was exactly like he said they were. Sid was on the floor, and that cunt was asleep in the bed. I reached down taking my shoe off, and threw it at Sid, hitting him in the back.

 He didn't move. I took my other one off and chucked it hard at his back and he jolted up and flipped around. "Get your ass up Sidney." I said through my teeth. He looked terrified of me standing there. Amanda jolted, and sat up, looking the same way. 

 "Uh, hey, Gemma." She mumbled. 

 "Shut the fuck up, you fucking cunt!" I yelled. I already felt Corey's hands on my shoulders, keeping a firm grip on me. Sid, looked like he was confused, looking at me, then Amanda. 

 "Look, I need to apologize for what I did to you all those years ago." Amanda said to me. Is this bitch for real?! 

 "Amanda, shut the fuck up! I don't fucking care! You were a cunt then, and you are a cunt now! Fuck!" I yelled louder. Corey was pulling me back more. "Fucking leave, and stay the fuck away from Sid." I said calmly. 

 She looked shocked and so did Sid. Sid was getting up, and walking to me. I backed up from him. Amanda scrambled to get out of bed. She didn't look pregnant, but whatever. She got to the door, and Corey pulled me back by my shoulders, letting her pass. He kept a hold on me until we heard the door shut. I spun around shoving past him, walking to the door. I heard running behind me as I had my hand on the door. 

 "Gemma! Stop!" Sid yelled grabbing my arm. I turned around and looked at him. 

 "Who is the fucking bitch on Twitter that you have your fucking mouth on?" I yelled. I saw Corey wide eyed behind Sid. 

 "Gemma, it wasn't like that either, ok? Can you let me explain?" He whispered. 

 "Oh fuck you! Have fun with your whores, Sidney! Corey, looks like you have a new roommate." I said, jerking my arm away from Sid. I looked down, seeing my shoes were missing. I shoved both of them, and made my way back to where I left them. I was so pissed and trying to get my shoes on, and I was failing. I heard them both run up, blocking my path. 

 "Gemma, it's not what it looks like. I mean it." Corey looked almost as desperate as Sid.

 "I don't fucking care! You son of a bitch Sid!" I yelled. He started walking over to me. "Back the fuck up!" I yelled. He shook his head, and Corey looked scared for Sid. 

 "Gemma, that was my cousin. I swear. Remember Rebecca?" He asked quietly. 

 "This is what you have as a defense?" I wasn't buying it. 

 "Rebecca Wilson. Look up her Twitter page, please?" He asked. I rolled my eyes, looking it up. Of course. It is his cousin. There we pictures of them as kids on there even.

 "Why the fuck is your mouth on your cousins like that?" I heard Corey laugh. 

 "Good question. Sorry." Corey smiled at me, then looked away. I looked at Sid. 

 "I was so fucked up last night. I don't have an answer, but I am deleting it. That I can tell you." He grabbed his phone and tossed it to Corey. "For love of anything holy, delete it." He said to him. Corey laughed, pulling it up. 

 "Why don't you also delete the pictures of him and Tits McGee too." I yelled at Corey. 

 "Yep. Doing that too." Corey said with a grin, not looking up. 

 "Why was she here?" I demanded to Sid. 

 "Gemma, when her and I broke up it was ugly." He said. 

 "Well, she's an ugly fucking bitch Sid! Who fucking cares!" I yelled, hearing Corey laugh again. 

 "Babe, it was one of those things I needed closure on. I didn't mean for her to come back here. I swear to you." Sid said, moving closer to me. 

 "Yeah? Maybe I should have Aaron stay over because I need closure Sid!" I yelled. I could tell his head was pounding, which is why I kept yelling.

 "What the fuck Gemma! Why would you say that?" He was getting pissed now. 

 "Why would you let Cunt of the Universe stay last night?!" Is he dumb? He looked at me and I could tell he was pissed and hurt. 

 "Gemma I didn't do anything last night. Corey can tell you that." He said. 

 "Corey is also your friend. How am I supposed to believe that? You had your phone off, pictures popping up all over internet of you with your fucking hands on strippers, and then you have that cuntbag stay for a sleepover? See where I am upset?" I yelled. I shoved past him and Corey, making my way to the door. The two of them are running after me like a couple of kids. 

 I opened the door, running out to my car. I have no idea what to believe, or not believe at this point. I had told him no more surprises, and that's all I got this morning. I am so mad and so hurt right now, it's best I just leave. I pulled away, leaving him there, and went home. I locked my door, and ran to my room, throwing myself onto my bed. 

 I sobbed, and cried, and laid there in the deafening silence of my house. Do I want to deal with this when he goes out or is gone? What did he think I would say? I am all about him going out and having a good time, but if he can't control himself, should he really be doing that? 

 I laid there for hours, crying, dozing off, crying some more. I was in deep thought, trying to figure out if this is really what we should be doing. I love Sid. God, do I love him. But, it's almost like if he's unattended, he acts like an asshole, and does stupid shit. 

 There was a knock on my door, pulling me out of my thoughts. I got up and went to answer it. I opened the door, and there was Corey. "What?" I asked, crossing my arms. 

 "Hey. Got a minute?" He asked. I sighed and let him in. I realized then I only had a tank top and shorts on, making me feel self conscious. I closed the door and he turned to look at me. 

 "Sid in the car?" I asked. 

 "No. He's at my place. He didn't think it was best to come over right now." He grinned slightly at me. 

 "Probably a wise choice. Need some clothes for him?" I asked. He chuckled and looked down. 

 "I am hoping I don't. Think you can come talk to him?" He asked. I glared at him and headed to the bedroom. I threw some clothes in a bag, and walked out handing the bag to Corey. He looked surprised, but wouldn't take it from me. 

 "Gemma, he didn't do anything last night. I was the only sober one, and he didn't even come close to doing anything like that. I wouldn't lie to you about this." He said.

 "Do either of you understand why I'm upset?" I asked. He sighed and looked down for a moment, then back at me. 

 "Yeah. Both of us do. We really, really do. It all looks bad. I told him that. He knows it too Gemma. Do you really want to not be with him?" He asked me. 

 "Its not that I don't want to be with him. It's that I told him no more fucking surprises with pictures on the internet. That's all I got today. I also don't want to keep worrying about this type of shit." I said. 

 "Look, just come over and talk to him. Or I can bring him here." He said. 

 "I'll think about it. In the meantime. Here's his bag." I said tossing it at his feet as I walked to the door, and opened it. Was I ever surprised when I saw Mick and Jim standing there. I looked at them and looked back at Corey. "What the fuck?" I asked. 

 "Gemma, we figured you wouldn't come willingly. So after talking with Jo, and made sure Bones wouldn't kill us, we figured we'd get ya there one way or another." Mick smiled. I glared at Corey who was now next to me, then at Jim and Mick. 

 "Not happening guys. Nice try." I said, going to turn from them. I didn't get a chance to because Mick scooped me up and threw me over his shoulder walking down the stairs with me. I heard them all laugh. 

 "I will kick the ever living fuck out of all three of you." I growled and struggled to get down. They laughed and I saw Jo standing outside smiling. 

 "Bye Gemma! See ya in a bit." Jo smiled at me. 

 "What the fuck?! You guys are fucking dicks!" I yelled hearing them laugh. Mick dropped me in Corey's car, and Alex was in the front turning to smile at me.

 "Fuck. What in the fuck!" I yelled. They were grinning and laughing. I went to climb over Jim, and out his window that was down. I felt hands pulling my legs back into the car. 

 "What the fuck Gemma!?" I heard, hearing the guys laugh more. 

 "You guys have a hold of her for fucksake?!" Corey laughed as he started driving. 

 "Dude, she's like a fucking spider monkey for Christ sake." Jim laughed. 

 "Hi Gemma." Alex grinned at me. 

 "Alex." I said crossing my arms. I was sitting in between Mick and Jim in the back. 

 "What, your not pissed at Alex?" Jim grinned at me. 

 "I didn't see him dragging me out of my house now did I?" I glared at Jim. His smile got bigger and he laughed. 

 "She's really cute when she's mad." Mick laughed. I saw Corey and Alex look at each other and started dying laughing. 

 "Surprised she hasn't kicked the shit out of you two yet. You won't think she's cute when she throws an ass beating your way." Alex grinned.

 "Ya gonna kick my ass Gemma?" Jim grinned at me. I turned and glared at him. "That's a yes." He laughed. 

 Sidney, you may get your ass kicked today.