The Day with the Downcast Farewell

                                    

                                          
It took a few hours but soon me and James were able to go outside without bursting into tears. Sirius took a little longer but by the time the guests began to arrive at the house for the funeral and wake, he promised he would be able to hold it together.
                          
In a weird way, it would have been better if the funeral was held somewhere else, not in the place where Euphemia and Fleamont had lived. Now I would just associate the house with their death in a depressing way. James and an old friend of the family that had only just been introduced to me in the past few weeks, had planned the funeral together so I was just as much in the dark about the arrangements as everyone else.
                          
My brief hope was that Marlene had agreed to come for moral support, I could definitely do with seeing her amongst all the sadness and gloom even with the fact there was a small chance she was a spy. Strangely, it was a risk I was willing to take, I almost wanted to give her a chance to prove herself.
                          
Me, James and the other two slowly walked down the hill to the traditional burial sight of the Potters, underneath an oak tree in a small grove. The funeral was quite formal, with only close friends and what limited relatives the Potter's had. I saw a girl who looked distinctly like Eden and James went over to talk to her, leaving me standing alone with all the strangers. Remus was comforting Sirius who had suddenly got emotional again and judging from Remus's warning glance, I should stay away. I looked around hopefully for Marlene but she wasn't there yet, my eyes instead resting on Peter who was stand awkwardly by a group of people, slightly on the outside. I slowly wove my way over to him and he gave me a small smile.
                          
"Lily, lovely to see you," He said. As he turned to me, I noticed that his once plump cheeks were looking considerably gaunter and his brown eyes had large bags under them.
                          
"It's lovely to see you too, Peter," I replied, hushing my voice as I said, "Peter, this is rude to say I guess, having not seen you in ages but... are you okay?"
                          
"Not really," He replied softly, "But who is these days, you know? I guess I'm just tired and stressed except usually when I'm stressed I just eat but my Dad is an awful cook."
                          
"Oh, you're staying with your Parents?"
                          
"My Dad," He corrected, "Child of divorce... recent thing, only happened in the past year or so."
                          
It suddenly struck me how little we really had seen Peter in the past few months. I wasn't entirely sure who was to blame, Sirius was quick to say that it was Peter who had cut them out and not the other way around but from my experience, Sirius nor James was the best at keeping in contact; perhaps Peter had just slipped through the cracks.
                          
"I thought I'd see you more on Order missions..."
                          
He gave a shrug, "I went on a few initially but I just wasn't... cut out for it, I guess. I still help though but mostly at the bases now, occasionally helping with planning although I don't feel I'm much good at that either... I try."
                          
"That's all we can ask for," I replied, unsure of what to say. Out of the four, Peter was the one I interacted with least so I wasn't entirely sure whether he was the type who wanted me to uplift him or allow him to wallow in pity, "You came today and that's more than just effort, that's friendship. It's a small thing but James said earlier it meant a lot that you came."
                          
"I should go over," He said, as drizzle slowly began to slip from the sky, forming little droplets on his brown hair, "Say something. I just feel so distant from the boys right now, I guess... look at this, I'm awful. At a funeral and I've managed to make this about my problems." He shook his head, "Please don't tell James about my moaning."
                          
"Wouldn't dream of it," I replied, "See another thing you've done right! Realised that you were off topic and changed it..."
                          
It was a reach and we both knew it. He gave me a half-grateful and half-awkward smile before sidling off towards James who was no longer talking to the Eden lookalike. He seemed very absent minded, allowing the droplets to form on his glasses without bothering to wipe them off. However, when Peter came over, his face broke into a smile, a genuine smile of happiness at being reunited. Although Peter seemed to think he couldn't do anything right, just by morally supporting James, he had made him happier which was a big deal even if it seemed small.