Ben Cook ~ Christmas

                                    

                                          
This was inspired by Underneath the Tree by Kelly Clarkson. And since it's Christmas, I decided to write a Christmas themed story.
                          


                          
You're here where you should be
Snow is falling as the carolers sing
It just wasn't the same
Alone on Christmas day
Presents, what a beautiful sight
Don't mean a thing if you ain't holding me tight
You're all that I need
Underneath the tree  
                          
I sighed as I sat on the couch, binge-watching a show that I hadn't seen in--I don't know exactly. But it had been a while. I stared at the screen, my eyes not seeing anything. I would have to spend Christmas alone this year. Again.
                          
Every year, Ben and I would spend Christmas together. But ever since he broke up with me and found another girl to spend his days with, we had been growing more and more distant. I would have them over out of sheer courtesy, but they stopped replying to my invitations. I guess being a famous Broadway performer and a Broadway performer's girlfriend/boyfriend has its perks. I should know. I was once in that position.
                          
Tonight, I'm gonna hold you close
Make sure that you know
I was lost before you
Christmas was cold and grey
Another holiday
Alone to celebrate
But then, one day, everything changed
You're all I need
Underneath the tree  
                          
I smiled at all the memories, remembering how lost I was- 
How hopelessly astray I was from the world and from the right track- 
Ben helped me see all the things I could do to get right- 
I wish we could repeat those days I was with Ben- 
Wish that I could be holding him close every day and night- 
Every time that I felt I should just give up- 

                          
You're here where you should be
Snow is falling as the carolers sing
It just wasn't the same
Alone on Christmas day
Presents, what a beautiful sight
Don't mean a thing if you ain't holding me tight
You're all that I need
Underneath the tree  
                          
I felt a tear escape one of my eyes and fall down my cheek, but I just ignored it- 
And felt it fall and fall and fall down- 
I had everything I could ever hope for- 

                          
I found what I was looking for
A love that's meant for me
A heart that's mine completely
Knocked me right off my feet
And this year I will fall
With no worries at all
'Cause you are near and everything's clear
You're all I need
Underneath the tree  
                          
He just waltzed into my life-
Made me feel special-
Gave me a life that I wished I had-
And then it all just slipped away- 
Away and away through my fingertips- 
And I was angry at myself for not going after it- 
Angry at Ben for not coming back- 
Angry at the world for giving me such a crappy life-
                          
Everything meant nothing to me-
AAAARGH LIFE-
                          
You're here where you should be
Snow is falling as the carolers sing
It just wasn't the same
Alone on Christmas day
Presents, what a beautiful sight
Don't mean a thing if you ain't holding me tight
You're all that I need
Underneath the tree  
                          
Why-
What happened-
I felt more tears streaming down my face now-
Falling and falling and falling-
What did I ever do to you, Ben-
Why did you leave-
You were happy-
(you seemed happy, shut up)
                          
And then one day everything changed
You're all I need
Underneath the tree  
                          
Why did my life get so jacked up-
How is it so-
I wish you were here-
I feel so empty without you-
(shut up)

                          
I can't feel this way-
I just can't-
He's not coming back-
Face it, honey-
You'll be back in the dumps-
Where you belong-
(shut up shut up shut up)
                          
You're here where you should be
Snow is falling as the carolers sing
It just wasn't the same
Alone on Christmas day
Presents, what a beautiful sight
Don't mean a thing if you ain't holding me tight
You're all that I need
Underneath the tree  
                          
My life has become a nightmare-
Ben, where are you?
Why can't you come back?
Why can't I find you?
Come back Ben come back-
I need you-
Come back-
                          


                          
There will be an alternate ending!
                          


                          


                          


                          
A/N: So sorry for not updating sooner guys. The wifi was turned off at my house, so I was basically cut off from Wattpad and such. I only got it back a few minutes ago. I'm so mad that I couldn't update! Merry Christmas 2017 anyway!
                          
And if any of you readers don't understand how the story is moving along, I based it off of how the books in Chaos Walking are written. I wrote it like this because the girl is remembering and having thoughts and we all know thoughts aren't one simple chain. They're a mess, and they go everywhere, so the story is written like it's in her head.