Chapter 1

                                    

                                          
Tim POV: 
I stare down at my glass of diet coke before looking up at her, as she slow dances with a man I hardly know. Her smile is sparkling, and her eyes are bright and warm... She's seems genuinely happy for the first time in a while. The girls watch her with smiles as well, while Gracie, our oldest, looks down at her lap. 
"You alright, honey?" I ask quietly. Gracie shakes her head, before getting up and walking out of the room. I quietly tiptoe out to follow her, finding her standing in the hall crying. "Baby, what's wrong?" I question gently, kneeling down to get on her level. She wipes her tears with her forearm, before looking at the door which leads back into the rehearsal dinner. 
"Momma's not going to love us anymore..." She cries softly, in a way that breaks my heart.
"Honey, that's not true." I begin to reassure her, watching her shake her head in defiance. 
"She stopped loving you... Why would it be different for us?" She raises her voice, leaving me a little dumfounded. My jaw drops slightly, as I try to find the right words to say, but I'm a little too shocked to answer. 
"You, and your sisters, are the single most important thing in our lives. Period. Nothing comes before you three, and you know that. There's not a thing you could do to make us stop loving you." I insist, seeing doubt still in her eyes. If that answer doesn't work, then I have no idea what else to say. Gracie nods, while I wipe her remaining tears. I walk her back in the room, feeling myself go numb as I hear the song. 
"These arms of mine... they are lonely... lonely and feeling blue... These arms of mine... they are yearning... yearning from wanting you..." Otis Redding plays through the room, as she continues to slow dance with him. Her expression changes, as her eyes immediately locate me, before wincing. I quickly walk over to our table, whispering over to her manager Jason to watch the kids, before I evacuate the room. If I stay any longer, I'm going to lose my mind. 
I rush down the stairs, and out the back exit to the alleyway. I walk down a bit, before pacing back and forth, forcing myself to breathe. 
My mind keeps going back to when we slow danced in the kitchen, the warm Tennessee air coming in through all the open windows, while the orange sunlight tinted the room, an Otis Redding record on. Gracie had just been born, and was asleep in her crib while we made the most of the moment. I don't think I ever loved her more than I did in that moment...
I slam my back against the brick of the building, and slide down to sit on the curb. I pull my knees up before putting my head in my hands, as if darkness would blot out the memories, but it only makes them brighter. 
I hear the emergency door slam, causing me to lift my head. She walks toward me, before sitting down beside me in silence. She hugs herself tightly, shivering a bit from the cold, but I know hell would have to freeze over before she'd take my jacket. She takes a deep breath, looking at the building on the other side of the alley and analyzing it, as if it were a work of art. I think she's just trying to find an excuse not to make eye contact. 
"He didn't know..." She start, before glancing over at me, as I rest my head against my knees. "He knows I like Otis, but had no clue that was our song, apparently." She laughs under her breath, before looking down at the big ring on her finger. She twists it around, a nervous habit she had even when it was my ring on her finger - a much smaller one than the one she wears now. 
"It's fine... I just... it caught me off guard." I reply, lifting my head up once more, and looking at the brick building across the alley. You can see where they've painted over graffiti in a couple of places. 
"What was going on with Gracie?" She asks, making my stomach drop. I shrug, not wanting to delve into it now. "Tim... come on..." She pries. 
"She was just upset. You should be focused on the party, I can handle the kids." I try to turn, looking into her eyes. She doesn't buy it, leaving me with no option but to answer. "She was worried that you getting married meant that you'd stop loving them." I answer, looking at the brick once more, knowing eye contact would gut me now. I can see her shut her eyes tightly from the corner of my eye, while she takes a deep breath. 
"She really liked him... I mean, she was all about him this morning." She begins to think out loud, completely misunderstanding it. 
"It's because of me." I croak out, cutting her thoughts short. She looks over at me, causing me to turn to look into her eyes. "She thinks that because you stopped loving me, that you could stop loving them too." I release, trying to hold back the emotion. Holding back my emotions in front of her is like trying to stop a freight train with your bare hands... it's fruitless. I swallow hard, before looking down at my lap to try and force my eyes to stay dry. She leans her head back against the brick, appearing just as stunned as I was when Gracie said it to me. 
"She didn't actually say..." She starts, before I shake my head. 
"That's exactly what she told me." I inform her, my stomach tying itself in knots. She puts her head in her hands. "I handled it... it's fine, now." I add, trying to put her at ease. She nods, before appearing to wipe her eyes. She looks over at me and opens her mouth, as if she were going to say something, before looking down. She stands up and faces me, before trying to speak again, but nothing comes out. I wait patiently, looking up at her. 
"You know if something ever happened to you, it'd kill me..." She croaks out, tears starting to pour out like a floodgate has been opened. I stand up, my first impulse being to hold her, but I refrain. "You and I... We aren't... We aren't romantic anymore, but that doesn't mean I don't..." She stumbles around her words, completely falling apart. I give in to my impulse, and wrap my arms around her, feeling her shake. 
"It's okay..." is all I can come up with, making me cringe. She sniffles, before pulling back after a couple moments, and inhaling deeply. I wipe her tears, making sure not to smudge her makeup. "You know I understand..." I add, watching her nod quickly. She sniffles once more, before laughing at herself. 
"Now I'm going to sound like I've been crying." She whines while laughing, making me smile. 
"Just say one of the girls said something sentimental." I offer her an excuse, causing her to laugh a little harder, before she clears her throat. She looks back at the door, taking a deep breath, before turning toward me. "You ready?" I ask, watching her nod. I follow her inside, and watch her transform back to the happy-go-lucky woman in love once more.