-1. Last celestial moments

                                    

                                          
            
                          
"We'll have a son."
                          
Silent approval.
                          
A man perhaps doesn't know, especially he can't imagine during such a shocking moment, but it's exactly in that instant he exercises on gentle sex the utmost power, the faculty of deciding of that spasmodic limbo, transforming it into heaven or hell according to what he'll tell or do.
                          
Marco instinctively chose the embrace, fast, careless of being rejected for the umpteenth time.
                          
"I love you Giulia, you can't imagine how much."
                          
Then he chose to say no more, even not to move, sure to have already clearly communicated his intentions, synthetized in the choice of the verb 'have'.
                          
I tried to gain distance, he didn't let me.
                          
"Are you scared? It's normal. Now I'm here with you, it will be all right."
                          
"Don't stay so close, let me go!"
                          
Accepting my request meant to allow me a few centimetres, too little to repress that feeling of suffocation I was fighting for days.
                          
"Marco, stop!"
                          
He really indulged my desire, but at that point his dense melancholy clung to me even more.
                          
"I did the test on Tuesday."
                          
He didn't seem interested in details, however I continued:
                          
"I did it at home after work. When I got out of the bathroom on TV there was the summary of your awards ceremony, I no longer knew where to look at."
                          
"You should call me right away."
                          
"You had more to celebrate."
                          
He forced himself to be silent for a few moments.
                          
"And you're not always so available, at least not with me."
                          
"Now you're exhausted, it's better to rest. Let's talk about it later."
                          
"No, now!"
                          
"I'd wait, a few hours more makes no difference."
                          
"No!"
                          
"Giulia, don't get so angry, it only steals you other energies."
                          
"I said, right now!"
                          
"Ok, but don't fret in this way."
                          
"Why can't I?!"
                          
He still kept saying, while I didn't:
                          
"I don't want Marco, I've already decided."
                          
The war declaration he didn't desire to listen, reluctantly he had to take up the gauntlet of the challenge.
                          
"Why?"
                          
"Don't try to psychoanalyze me, I'm not one of the unstable women you like so much to attend every day!"
                          
"I love you Giulia, so much. And you?"
                          
"I don't want, you won't succeed to make me change my mind!"
                          
"You didn't answer me."
                          
"Stop it, I told I've already decided, I don't want!"
                          
"All right, just tell me why."
                          
"Because I have other plans for my life!"
                          
"Explain to me, I'm listening."
                          
"I worked so hard to get here! I don't want to lose everything, I don't want!"
                          
"Are you sure about it? What if instead I always stay with you, preventing all this from really happening? You're not alone, we're together. I can meet you if you allow me."