Rehearsal

                                    

                                          
Justin's POV
                          
Me and Fredo got out of the car and sat on top of the hill. I was still debating with myself whether or not I should tell him about the deal with Barbara. Or just go along with the deal as that would protect Selena and she would be out of my messed up life. I wasn't sure how this talk with him will go. 
                          
"So why don't you start from when you broke up with Selena and then tell me why."  Fredo spoke up. 
                          
"It was on Monday."
                          
"Okay now tell me why." Fredo signalled me to carry on.  
                          
"I just had to." I looked away and tried not to make eye contact with him. 
                          
"What do you mean you just had to? Man you loved her. I know you never said it out loud, but I could see it in your eyes. You loved her so much and you were even planning to ask her to be your girlfriend. Then what happened? Did she do something?" 
                          
"No. She didn't do anything? It was my fault....it's my fault that I ever thought that I could be in a relationship with a girl like Selena.....I know the life that I live and I'm putting Selena in danger by entering her in my dangerously empty life." I quickly wiped my tear before it rolled down my cheek. 
                          
"Bro....what do you mean?" He rubbed my back. 
                          
"I'm a drug dealer and a criminal, I've killed people. Do you think Selena would ever wanna be with a guy like me?" 
                          
"But she doesn't need to know."
                          
"That's what I thought. But who we kidding? The truth will come out eventually." 
                          
"Where did this thought come from suddenly? You never thought about that before you asked her out?" 
                          
"It's Barbara." I just couldn't hold it in anymore, he had to know. 
                          
"Wait what? What does she have to do with your relationship?" He furrowed his brows. 
                          
"Everything! That bitch swore that if I continued to date Selena she would tell her what I do and who I really am!" I could feel anger boil inside of me. 
                          
"Shit man. That fucking bitch I knew there was something wrong with her." 
                          
"I can't be with the girl I love because I'm afraid she would leave me or worst, hate me after she finds out what I am." 
                          
"Look if she loves you and you love her then nothing can stop that. No matter who you are and what you do she will still love you the same. Just tell her Justin, if she loves you she will stay, trust me. Would you rather have a relationship filled with lies or one filled with trust and honesty?" 
                          
"But....what if she leaves?"
                          
"Then she was never yours. You had her because you lied about who you were, so she was never with the real you in the first place. It's time you find out if she really loves you and if she does she will stay even after knowing the real you." 
                          
"But I don't wanna lose her." 
                          
"Look, do you think she loves you?" I paused. Me and Selena never said I love you to each other probably because we've only been dating for a while. But I'm certain that I love her, I'm not sure if she does.