Chapter 105

                                    

                                          
*Louis' POV*
                          
Was Harry kidding about him being fine with the ideas of me going out with Dominic or was he forcing himself? What if he's moved on already in the short time we've been apart? All these questions keep my head spinning for answers, answers I don't know.
                          
Dominic was nice enough to offer his day to me. The past hour has consisted of walking, talking, and more walking with Nick. Nick is short for Dominic, I grew tired of saying his complete name so I figured why not make a nick name for him?
                          
"Louis?" Dominic calls next to me.
                          
"Yeah?"
                          
"You've been distracted the whole time since we left the hospital. Is something bothering you?" Yes something is bothering me. My boyfriend is, the fact that my boyfriend isn't my boyfriend anymore. The fact that I feel that he's getting over me. The fact that I don't have him anymore.
                          
"Not really." I can't tell him the truth, there's not enough trust to do so.
                          
"You're lying, your voice becomes high when you lie." Shit.
                          
"So what if something is wrong? What are you going to do about it? You can't help me." Little does he know...
                          
"Oh but I can. Here take a seat." He says, pulling out a chair from the small outdoor Cafe's table we were just walking past. Gentleman, hmm. I take a seat, not knowing if I'll actually tell him or not. "Spill." He demands.
                          
"It's complicated." I admit, it's true.
                          
"It's never too complicated." Oh but it is.
                          
"You see, there's this person who I was in a relationship with until not too long ago. We broke up but then that person tried to make it up. I was stubborn and didn't give that person a second chance. Now I have the feeling that, that person is drifting away all because of my selfish actions."
                          
"Ah, so this is about a girl?" I can't say it's about a guy. It'd ruin everything.
                          
"Yeah," I'm obviously lying, "moving on. What would you do if you still loved that person, how would you try to get them back?" Anyone can answer this question, except me.
                          
"I'd get over them. Yeah I loved them once but they had their chance. One chance and that's all it takes. You see, you give them once chance then you'll end up giving them the second chance, the the third and then the fourth. Soon enough they won't even be taking you seriously." Everything he says is right, it'll only become a cycle. Who says that Harry would ever prevent that cycle from happening? No one.
                          
"What if I know that that person won't do it again? Then what?" I can't only look at the negative side of this situation, there's a positive one too. What Harry did was wrong, yes, but I can't let this one thing ruin everything we had going on. I miss Harry, I really do and I want to go back to what we had. Although he kept that huge secret from me and ended up breaking up with me, I hold my own lies and secrets. Mine might not hurt him but our relationship and the way he'll view it will. I've come so close to telling him and letting it all out until that time he told me that there's no point in dating someone who you'll know won't be around forever. Will I be around forever? Of course not. Will I be around for as long as Harry? I'm not so sure. If I were to tell him just that, I'd lose him along with our relationship and I don't want that.
                          
"You can't be right? Whoever this chick is can go to hell! Anyone would be lucky to have you," it takes him a second to analyze what he just said sounds wrong, "I don't mean it like that. Don't get the wrong impression of me. Oh god you probably think I'm gay now!" He says, stuttering. What?
                          
"No, no! I don't think that at all, trust me." Now that he points it out, he brings it to my attention. There's not alot of things that hint to him being well, gay. This is stupid, why would I ever think that. Maybe this is why Harry is so jealous of Dominic, he probably thinks he is. Even if Nick was gay, I would never, ever leave Harry for him.