EIM PART 1- Chapter 5: I Never Truly Belonged

                                    

                                          
2 Years Later
Xena was wandering around the pack border board out of her mind. Myself as well. It was her turn to be on border patrol, but it helps not interest her. She knew this isn't what her position should be. The thing she hated the most was she was always thinking about everything or maybe it's just myself and she takes the raft of my sadness. 
Mazen and Fluffy had already found mates had pups and have grown old. Their pups look like my age. Don't get me wrong my wolf has grown but it took forever for us to get this big. If you can't tell I have noticed I have been getting mixed up between separating my wolf from myself although our bond has strengthened and our love for our pack has grown, we somehow feel misplaced feeling again like we went off track. Knowing this both my wolf and I agreed on leaving the pack and somehow find what we were looking for. I would leave now but I have too many good-byes to say. When I saw Mazen he tried to get up and come to me, but I was faster being my wolf is younger than he is now. I nuzzled his wolf he let out whimpers as Xena communicated we were leaving. But somehow it's like Fluffy knew too. He came and cuddled into my side and rubbed his scent all over me almost like he didn't want me to forget him. 
They both showed how sad they were before I made my way to the pack just as I was about to say bye to the Luna and the alpha some wolves from the southern border raced to our alpha. Knowing something was going down I followed the warriors an alpha. This was the first time in while Xena was actually being playful and confident we were back on track. So, she gave me hope that whatever is coming will change everything. A few of the warriors tried to back me off their trail but Xena was too excited. My heart started to beat faster and my fur felt a light cool breeze all over. The next thing I know I smelled a scent that I haven't in a long time. Campfire and melted chocolate. The smell almost reminded me of the smores my dad used to make for me when we would go for our nature campouts. 
When I follow where it's coming from my wolf whimpers, but she isn't sad, on the other hand, was scared out of my wits. She is trying to take over forcing me to hold her back because she was trying to throw herself at him. When I could hold back and more, she franticly starts prancing around him. She starts to rub her fur all over his neck and sides when he gently rubs his snout on Xena's body she becomes distracted enough to not noticed I have taken over. 
As I back away he followed suit and comes closer to me, this made me sprint away from him, but it was like a shift in me when I felt a happy pressure in my heart. This was almost like the alpha is what or who Xena and I longed for. At this point I have been running for so long my legs feel like they're going to collapse beneath me. I chose a nice spot to hide behind a tree that was close to the river so the noises around us would be able to cancel out some of my loud breathing. 
I slowly approached the river only to notice that that sent it my nose again. I looked around and right behind me in a blink of an eye, I heard a twig snap as my headshot towards the noise I noticed it was the alpha. His big white and silver wolf with a black stripe down his back look me right in my glowing green eyes, his brown orbs only made me realize how deep I could fall for him because that one long glance already feels like I love him. Now if that doesn't make me sound crazy, I don't know what else could. I wonder if this is what mates are supposed to be like? Would it be so bad if he was? Is this what Xena has been looking for? 
My alpha bowed his head to this new alpha, it was like he was trying to show respect. I didn't understand why, it's like they were agreeing on something. Shortly after their eye contact seized the other alpha made his way to me stopping two or three feet away. Not going to lie I was scared shit less. My tail unintentionally went in between my legs. 
I don't know why but the huge alpha started cracking and shaking and howling. In a short amount of time, his wolf disappeared, and right before me was this grown nicely built, and tanned man. His brown eyes, short blonde hair, and smooth face loured me in like magic. I don't know what he did, but my body is reacting to him in ways I've never felt before. Most of these feelings are quite frightful. 
He seems more educated on this situation mostly because I haven't seen or talked to a human since my first shift. He looked down at me with this knowing look and a slight smirk on the side of his face in a cute but annoying way, he caught my eyes roaming down his sexy body, and chuckles a little.
I turned away I have never seen a naked man before. I hardly even remember what a human body even looks like. Not knowing how he shifted into his human form I whimpered and sadness knowing that no one has ever taught me how and began to bring back a flashback of my old family.
This made me realize I totally forgot what it was like to be human. The only part of my humanity I had with me was the part of my brain that was able to speak for myself. I was always on guard or was in control of her wolf form she only had control when I wanted to do some thinking or meals.
He stood there looking at me like I was missing something. I went to be close to him avoiding looking anywhere but his abs and his face. My body pulled me to his sent and his touch totally ignoring the fact he is naked. I was uncomfortable and he started petting me and kneeled in a position where his certain manly parts weren't noticeable. That made me feel a little better being near him. When I finally looked up into his eyes I noticed he looked at me with questioning eyes. Then he raised a bit and opened his mouth and asked me a question I didn't quite understand. 
"Aren't you going to shift mate?" The most luring deep voice said to me. I was so dazed by hearing a real voice other than my head that I totally zoned out. This didn't please my mate at all. Wait I just said mate wow I can't believe I found him. After being a wolf for so long I totally forgot I had a human side I don't even know how long it's been. I start to panic and back up. My mate notices and shouts "What am I not good enough for you?" I was in pain seeing him look that hurt. I'm so mad I don't know how to shift I can't even talk to him. Only people in the same pack can mind link and I can't even do that. 
"I asked you a question that you are going to answer," he said impatiently. "Now I said.. shift!" He shouted at me using his alpha tone.
Xena let out a pain full howl and I felt all my bones cracking, I started breathing rapidly and I couldn't breathe. Each breath I took came shorter than the rest until an unimaginable pain ripped through my body. More shifting in my bones happened and my face started feeling like it had been smashed in by a brick wall. I could feel all the muscles and bones on my face popping and placing them into I can only assume my shifted form. Slowly all my wolf's hair was gone and lite pail skin replaced it.
Still not being able to bounce back from my first shift my breathing started to give me a really hard time. I couldn't even stay focused on his handsome face. Each breath I took felt like I was sinking into a deep ocean unable to breathe until it released me, only to pull me under again and again.
I glanced back at my mate ready to collapse on the rocky ground when he caught me just in time. He had the most scared look on his face. Still not being able to take full a breath I fight my hardest to keep looking into his eyes I rub his face and struggled to say "You found me." Then I let the darkness take me away.
A/N 
Hey thought I'd posted an extra chapter hope you all like and don't forget to vote if you do thanks