[Lauren Jauregui]
-The Beginning {01}
I hate my life.
Yes I loved the fact I get to sing like Ive always loved. Is hare it with 5 of my best friends and we have amazing adorable fans. That matters the world to me. There isnt anything I wouldnt do to please them. Hearing them say we saved them, it touches my heart.
But theres always a flaw.
Always.
This isnt some movie where everybody gets a happy ending. Far from it actually. In fact this is the part of my life I hate most. Famous people have had their choices taken away. The ultimate choice of love.
Ever since I could remember I had seen it happen. On TV I watched my favorite TV stars or singers grow up. Grow old. Grow to the dreaded age of 18. Thats when the choices stopped. You couldnt love who you wanted. Your love was chosen for you.
See thats the thing about fans. They say they love you but ultimately your the one making the sacrifices to please them. And nows its forced. The uprising of the Fandom was huge. Now every time their favorites turn 18, they drag them out to New York. Where they havea. Huge bowl and make them fish out a name. A girl or a guy. Doesnt matter. And that name is your soul mate.
You dont get to chose.
They'll find you.
They know all.
My 18th was tomorrow.
Tomorrow.
The day where I stood in front of the camera. Where I fished a name of the other 18 year olds with me and I would be forced to love them.
Because if you dont its basically death.
Everything is ripped away from you.
Ive seen houses burnt.
Families killed.
Suicide.
And I cant do that. Fifth Harmony would be dead if that happened. And that is not something Im willing to risk.
I am waiting in my room of our house. The girls and I share one in Maine. Why? I dont know. It has a beach nearby. But Im not sure why we dont live in California or something. Weird but remote and peaceful. Kind of nice considering we all turn 18 tomorrow...
"Lauuuurrrreeennn!" Camila.
The small girl barges into my room. She plops down on my bed without waiting for a response. "Hey Camz."
She furrows her brow. "You okay?"
"Im not ready."
"Fate Ceremony?"
I nod.
She takes my hands in hers. "Its okay Laur-"
"They rig it Camz. I know they do. They dump the name of the person they most want them to be with in there. No other names. Just 1 on a thousand slips of paper." I snifle.
Camila gives a sad smile. "I know but just think about whats best."
"How are you so calm?" I ask.
She shruggs. "Its a gift."
I give a pathetic laugh.
"Do you know who you want to love?" She asks.
"No. I want to find him or her on my own. Without it being forced. Why, do you know?" I ask.
She shakes her head. "No."
Theres a soft rapping at the door. Dinah, Normani, and Ally come in.
"We intruding?" Ally asks, her voice a small whisper.
I shake my head. "Just being sorrowful."
Normani laughs. "That makes 5 of us."
I smile. "Yeah but-"
Simon appears in the doorway before I can finish. "Girls. We need to get on the plane. Its time."
YOU ARE READING
Breaking
Fanfiction"I will die a little every day, watching you love someone else." Laurinah Fanfic
