Chapter Seventeen

                                    

                                          
Natsu Dragneel
                          
"I'd like to take proper classes," I said, standing in front of Principle Makarov's desk. He seemed surprised by my statement, struggling to find words. "I have proper hearing aids and my grades are high enough to allow it. Please, sir, I . . . I don't feel right in that class. Not without -" I couldn't bring myself to say her name. If I said it, I would be thrown into a fit of sobs. "I just can't."
                          
Principle Makarov sighed. He nodded his head in understanding. "Losing someone close to you is truly heartbreaking. She was a wonderful student, Young man, and a wonderful friend. I believe she would be happy to see you in classes where you are surrounded by your loved ones. I will get to your schedule change. School will officially start up tomorrow, so you will be set by then. Have a nice day, Mr. Dragneel."
                          
"Thank you, sir." I walked out of Principle Makarov's office and out of the school. I climbed into the white car, sighing. I pressed my head against the dashboard, my tears threatening to fall. I refused to let them fall, though. "Take me home, please."
                          
Moana nodded her head. She drove me home in silence, but as we reached my neighborhood, she started talking. "I'm going back to Hawaii," She explained, "and I want you to come with me." I opened my mouth to protest, but Moana stopped me. "I know a doctor," She said, "he is very skilled and could give you want you need. A cochlear implant. I froze. I knew about cochlear implants. Grandine told me about them. They were often the final decision a deaf person made when they wanted to try and get their hearing back. "You'd be gone for a year, that's all. I'll enroll you in one of the schools and you can live with me and -"
                          
"Do you know what you're asking me to do?" I asked. Moana pulled up to the side of the street. She gripped the steering wheel. "You're asking me to pack my things up, leave my friends, my family, Gray, for a year and live with you. What if the implant doesn't work? What if when I come back, they've all forgotten about me? You abandoned me once, how do I know you won't do it again?" I asked, my tone harsh. I had agreed to see Moana under the implication that she only wanted to say goodbye, but this wasn't at all what she suggested.
                          
Staring out the window, Moana said, "Look inside the glovebox." I opened the glovebox. Two tickets to Hawaii rested inside. "I bought an extra, just in case. My flight doesn't leave for another three days. I understand that you might not want to come, but will you at least think about it? For me?" I opened the passenger door. I unbuckled and climbed out of the car. "Natsu!" Moana called as I climbed out.
                          
I slammed the door shut. I pulled the hood of my sweatshirt over my head before running at top speed towards my neighborhood. Moana called for me to come back, but I didn't stop running and she made no attempt to follow me. When I reached my house, I sprinted in. I ignored Grandine and Igneel's' greetings, sprinted past Wendy's bedroom, and slammed my bedroom door. I collapsed onto my bed.
                          
I pulled out the plane ticket from my pocket, staring at it. It had my name on it and everything. A one way flight to Hawaii from Japan. I sat up and threw the ticket into the drawer of my desk. I pulled my hoodie off, throwing it into my closet. I paced my room, running my fingers through my hair. Thoughts raced through my head. 
                          
'Should I go?'
                          
'How would the others react?'
                          
'Why does she want me to come all of a sudden?'
                          
'Could I bring Happy?'
                          
'How would I communicate with others? I don't know any English!'
                          
'What would Gray say?'
                          
That's where my mind stuck. Gray. What would he say? What would he do? How would he react? I fell down into my desk chair more confused than ever. Why was I thinking about this? I didn't want to go. Didn't I?"
                          
I pulled the hearing aids out of my ears. I placed them on my desk. I stared at them as the silence enclosed around me. I had grown attached to the noise. Silence, pure silence, felt wrong. How was that possible? I'd spent so many years with it surrounding me, now I couldn't even stand it. I reached to grab the hearing aids, but stopped myself.
                          
I needed to see Gray.
                          
Mike let me in without any complaint. I greeted Lyon, who was playing video games, and Ur in the kitchen before going to Gray's room. I knocked and was quickly told to come in. When Gray saw me, he sat up from his bed. "This is new. I usually come to your house." It was obvious he was trying to make a joke, but he quickly turned serious as he noticed my distressed appearance. "What's wrong?" He asked.
                          
I couldn't help myself. I sprinted to Gray, wrapping my arms around him in a tight hug. Gray returned the hug without wasting time. He asked no more questions, just held me in silence. This was the silence I had grown to love. Silence that wasn't actually silence. Silence with the faint sound of bird and wind. Silence where you could hear the faint breathing of the one you held. This was the silence I had been needing. The silence I wanted to hold onto forever.
                          
"I . . . " I chocked back my cry, "I'm going to Hawaii." Gray tensed. He didn't say anything, so I kept talking. "Moana, my Mom, she told me that if I went with her, I could get a cochlear implant. It'll . . . it might fix my deafness. I would be gone for a year and -" Gray's grip tightened on me. "Gray?"
                          
Grau buried his face in my hair. "I can't stop you, I know that," He said, "and I can't change your decision. Just know, no matter how far you go, I'll wait for you. Got it? I'll wait for you. I'll wait a year, two years, three years, it doesn't matter. I promised I wouldn't leave you, Natsu, and I intend to stick to that." Gray pulled his face away and we stared into each other's eyes. "I love you."
                          
Breathlessly, I said, "I know."