Tension at dinner

                                    

                                          
Percy POV
                          
The last thing I remember was not being able to breathe normally and then the cold floor. I woke up to someone running hands though my hair and saying my name. I came to and rose my head while opening my eyes slowly.
                          
  "Percy thank gods, what happened? Did you do what I said? Medicine, ice, check bandages?" My mom had her hand on the side of my head and the other feeling my forehead for a fever. 
                          
   I pushed her hands away and got up slowly. "It's nothing, not like it matters anyways." I started walking to my dresser to find a shirt as I wasn't wearing one at the moment. I didn't like my scars being so...exposed.
                          
 "It does matter. It's not nothing Percy. I need to know what happened... was-was it a panic attack again?" My moms voice went gentle while her eyes had tears in them.
                          
I pulled the shirt over my head and sighed.
                          
"Please don't, I don't wanna talk about it ok? Can I just be alone right now?" I don't know why I said I wanted to be alone, I really wanted comfort and company but my mouth said otherwise. 
                          
My mother's shoulders slumped and she started walking, "dinner will be ready soon. And Paul and I still need to talk to you." She exited, keeping the door open a crack. Usually I'd be annoyed but I was glad it was left like that. It showed I wasn't totally alone.
                          
  I sat on my bed and plopped backwards. Great just swell. My life is just so perfect right now. That was sarcasm if you couldn't tell. I grabbed my phone and saw it was 5:47. Man I was out.  
                          
   I know it hurts my mom to see me like this, and to find me like that? Gods, I'm the worst son. My phone on the other hand has 3 missed calls from Jason and a bunch of texts in the group chat. But there was one text that caught my eye
                          
Wisegirl❤️: hey, I didn't want to indulge in the group chat. Hope your doing well :)
                          
 I smiled and my heart fluttered immensely. My mind became overpowered with her image. She was perfect in every way. And was beautiful like no other I've seen.
                          
To WiseGirl❤️: I'm doin fine. My mom did find out though. :(
                          
Send.
                          
I honestly wasn't sure how to text her, whatever I sent sounded dumb. I tapped my finger against the back of my phone  anxiously as I waited for a ding!
                          
From WiseGirl❤️: I knew it, you should've listened to me. 
                          
I smiled at her response, we texted like that till I was called for dinner. I texted a goodbye and headed out.
                          
   I felt the tension. Sophie was eating her food happily and my mom and Paul were laughing and talking, but when they saw me it was shut down. Well except Sophie she just kept giggling at the bubbles she made with her straw.
                          
   I took a seat and avoided eye contact. The chewing of food and once in a while Sophie talking about her day was all that was heard throughout supper. I just pushed my food around taking small bites. Having a panic attack made me tired and I just wanted to crash. Food almost made me want to throw up. My hands were shaky so I avoided grabbing for my water.

                          
   The food started making me nauseous so I got up but my mom called me back.
                          
"Sophie please clear your plate, we need to talk to your brother. Okay sweets?" Paul spoke to her gently and Sophie complied easily. 
                          
   When she was out of the room their eyes burned into mine. I held my hands under the table so they couldn't see they were shaking so bad. I just wanted to cry and sleep. (a/n mood) 
                          
   "Percy why did you think it was logical to go to school? When we gave you strict instructions to Stay home and get better?" My mom asked me, her tone of voice sounded like the one she'd use when I came home and said I got expelled. Disappointed. 
                          
I didn't say anything, fear that I would break.
                          
   "Young man, in the past years I've known you, you would never do this. So why now? Especially to your mom?" Paul cut in when I didn't answer.
                          
"I-I didn't s-stay home. Because I thought I could handle school better. Sorry it's been a while since I've been too school bloody and bruised. Maybe next time I'll get more lucky." I had a slight sassy tone in my words but also a broken one.
                          
   "Percy-" I got up and left to my room ignoring their calls. I slammed my door and went into my bathroom and locked that door. I started the shower. I needed to relax, and cry, mostly cry. 
                          
And that's how I spent my night crying in the shower.
                          
———
                          
The next morning I was in my bed and my alarm went off. I got up to go brush my teeth and get dressed. But after I brushed my teeth my mom knocked and let herself in.
                          
"Can we talk?" Her voice soft but raspy. She was in her work clothes and I knew we wouldn't talk long.
                          
  I nodded my head and sat down on my bed as she did the same. There was a feeling in the air, I didn't know what. It wasn't tension, but it wasn't, awkward.
                          
  "Percy let me start off. I'm sorry, ok? Now let me finish.  I'm sorry I never thought about what this brings back for you. I just want to forget he happened. So I start thinking like it. But whenever I see a scar on your arm, or a sad look in your eyes. It brings it all back. And I wish I never married him. You were so young Perce..." her voice cracked and a tear streamed down, "so...young, your father and then him and now as you get older you start piecing things together. And when I came home last night I wanted to go back and change everything. You wouldn't have to go through this if I would've just worked harder." I hugged my mom instantly.
                          
  "Mom, you were the best. You ARE the best. You worked harder than anyone I ever knew, you still do. it happened, we have to let go of that and move on the best we can. I'll be ok in the end. I'm sorry if I seem distant at times, but mom you lost more than me. Your Husband, your parents, missed my childhood cause of him. You're my hero mom." I wasn't crying but I knew my mom was and all those years she was strong for me, it's time I did the same.
                          
   We stayed like that till she remembered she had work. 
                          
"Alright, no school today or the rest of the week. Please Percy just rest. Love you, I'll see you tonight." She kisses my head and leaves. 
                          
He may have ruined me, but he could never ruin my family.