Some Funny Status Ideas

                                    

                                          
1) Sometimes all you need is love. Lol, just kidding, you need money. :').
                          
2) Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up.
                          
3) I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.
                          
4) I feel lazier than the guy who drew the Japanese flag. (No offence japanese!)
                          
5) I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.
                          
6) Doing the moonwalk is the only way to look cool while wiping dog crap off your shoes.
                          
7) Before talking; Please connect the tongue to the brain!
                          
8) I'm jealous of my parents, i'll never have a kid as cool as theirs.
                          
9) Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters.
                          
10) The only reason god made cousins so that parents can compare our marks.
                          
11) People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world.
                          
12) When life gets tough, remember: You were the strongest sperm.
                          
13) The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza.
                          
14) Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
                          
15) When I drink alcohol.. Everyone says I'm alcoholic. But.. When I drink Fanta.. No one says I'm fantastic.
                          
16) I'm not single, I'm just romantically challenged.
                          
17) The funniest thing in class is when the teacher cracks a joke and no one laughs.
                          
18) The annoying moment when the TV commercials are so long that you forget what you're watching.
                          
19) Remember, there are two words in life that will open a lot of doors for you. Push and Pull.
                          
20) If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be. If it does not, hunt it down & kill it.
                          
21) I hate when I am about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.
                          
22) Dear iPhone, Please stop changing my rude words into nice ones. You piece of shut.
                          
23) I enjoy long romantic walks to the fridge.
                          
24) Our language is called the mother tongue because the father never gets a chance to Speak.
                          
25) When your ex asks if you can still be friends right after a break up, it's like having a kidnapper tell you to keep in touch.
                          
26) That awesome moment, when You say something funny in class and everyone laughs at it n then you sit there like a Legend..
                          
27) That Awesome Moment, When You Find A Free WiFi In Public Places.. :-D
                          
28) That Amazing Moment.. When YOu DrOp YOur PhOne.. But, The HeadphOnes Save Its Life.. ^_-
                          
29) They say "don't drink and drive". Well.. yesterday I was drinking a juice box while riding my tricycle. Yeah. I'm a badass.
                          
30) That moment when a question on a test is so hard that even your inner voice is like "Fuck this shit lets work at McDonald's".