Chapter 10: Imprisoned by Expectations

                                    

                                          
I try to get some sleep after returning back to the dorm and I make sure to hide Tempest's picture in my bag before climbing into bed and sleeping. However, a few hours later I wake up to Ryder hovering over me and shaking me.
                          
"Wake up," Ryder sighs, "We're going to practice your magic. Today's Thursday, and exams are tomorrow. You don't want to fail, do you?"
                          
"No," I sigh and slowly sit up while I rub my eyes, "I'm still used to the time in the Human Realm. This realm is six hours behind the Human Realm."
                          
"Wouldn't that mean--" Ryder sighs and shakes his head, "Nevermind...let's just get started."
                          
"Okay," I nod and climb out of bed before grabbing my wand out of my bag, "Where do we begin?"
                          
"Try summoning a light orb," Ryder says.
                          
"Okay," I say and ready my wand with a determined look on my face, "Lumen Orbis!"
                          
A small light starts to illuminate in the air, but it quickly fizzles out and I sigh.
                          
"Try again," Ryder says and grabs my hand that's holding my wand and gently waving it around, "Try to feel the magic in you, but don't think too hard about it."
                          
"O--Okay," I nod and try again, "Lumen Orbis!"
                          
The light glows bright this time and appears more than before, but it fizzles out just as quickly and I sigh again before smiling bitterly.
                          
"Again," Ryder says.
                          
"Okay," I smile, "I'm sure I'll get it eventually! I just have to keep trying. Lumen Orbis!"
                          
For the first time since I've met Ryder he chuckles before it turns into full on laughing as he watches me.
                          
"What?" I raise a brow and glance at him.
                          
"That look on your face," Ryder smiles slightly, "You were pouting, but you seemed so concentrated."
                          
"Was I really?" I ask in surprise, "I never noticed."
                          
My hand slowly lowers to my side and I stare at Ryder as my lips part slightly and my eyebrows raise. Ryder's smile falls and he stares at me in confusion.
                          
"What?" He asks.
                          
"You just smiled at me..." I say.
                          
"Don't get used to it," He says and crosses his arms while glancing away before glancing back, "Let's continue training."
                          
"Got it!" I beam and attempt to cast a light orb several more times, but continue to fail.
                          
I sigh as I flop down on my bed and Ryder sits down on his.
                          
"Oh well," I sigh as I look up at the ceiling before a smile forms on my face and I look over at Ryder, "I'll just have to keep trying! I'll get it eventually, I just know it!"
                          
"I really don't understand you..." Ryder sighs.
                          
"Huh?" I question.
                          
"You're always so positive. Your soul is so bright that it should guide you through any darkness no problem, just as your personality is overly too cheery for me, but you -- you're unwavering, so I suppose that's a good thing," Ryder says.
                          
"Well," I smile at him, "I guess I'm just positive because it's all I ever had. My parents moved away to another country and so I lived with my aunt, which I was grateful that I had her, but something just didn't feel right. And in my old school I was always messing things up because I'm clumsy, so I would always cause accidents, which annoyed a lot of people. I guess I never really made any friends because of that. But here I'm friends with several people already and I feel welcomed."
                          
"I'm not an optimist, I never was. I believe that you should expect the worst possible outcome to happen, but hope for the best one to happen. Take everything into account whenever making decisions, too, don't just think about yourself, think about the other person and why they did or said what they did before just assuming things. I don't like people who hide behind their false realities in order to escape from the truth. I don't mind building walls and barricading yourself as long as you don't shut people out when the time comes and also realize what's true and what's not, but don't build a fantasy," Ryder says as he watches me, "All my life I've been expected to be perfect. Perfect grades, perfect personality, perfect style, perfect friends, perfect magic...but Ace was never expected to be perfect, he could do whatever he wanted. But the thing is, he was flawless at everything he ever did without even trying and without even being expected to."
                          
"Is that why you hate him?" I whisper.
                          
Ryder glances away before his eyes meet mine again and he sighs.
                          
"Yeah..." Ryder trails off, "We should probably get going to class."
                          
"Oh, right," I smile weakly at him and I find myself happy that he decided to open up to me somewhat.
                          
I gather my things and go to the bathroom to get changed before grabbing my bag and waking up Antheia and Flinn, who were sleeping in their fox forms under my bed. Once they wake up and stretch the two of them climb into my bag and I head off to class. As I'm walking to class I pass by a girl with icy blue eyes and dark brown hair, wearing a black and white outfit clutching a book to her chest, and her visible hand has a chain bracelet that wraps around her wrist and connects to three of her fingers with a red, teardrop jewel by the chain on her middle finger. Her icy blue eyes meet mine as she passes me and it's as if I can see the blue glow before the effect seems to vanish.
                          
"Strange..." I mutter before arriving at my classroom.