Chapter Nineteen

                                    

                                          
          It was just before noon and Brock and I had been taken into a conference room to meet with child services. I was nervous but well prepared for any questions that could be thrown my way. "Hi, you must be Kate Dawson." A younger woman entered the room with a binder in hand. "I'm Mel, with child services."
                          
          I nodded and stood to shake her hand. "Nice to meet you, Mel. This is Brock, I hope it's alright if he stays."
                          
          She smiles. "Yes, of course." She sits down in front of us at the table and pulls out some papers. "Now, I understand that you would like to foster the child?" I nod. "I'm sure you know that I have to ask some questions before I can determine if you're eligible. So, do you have a permanent residence?"
                          
          "I own a farm just outside of town with Brock."
                          
          She nods and jots down some information on the paper in front of her. "I'll need to visit at some point to make sure the residence is up to state requirements. And, do you have a job?"
                          
          "I work as a trainer."
                          
          "For what company?"
                          
          I wasn't sure how to answer that. Brock noticed my hesitation and pushed a folder towards Mel. "She works for me. A recent pay stub and a copy of the deed to the farm is in there, in case you need it."
                          
          She smiles and takes a look at the paperwork inside. "Excellent. I see you both are well prepared." She pauses. "Now, onto the hard question. Why do you want to foster to adopt?"
                          
          I took a deep breath and began to tell my story. I started from the beginning with Cain and ended with my miscarriage. I could tell Mel was expecting something much different than what I was telling her, but I was being honest, and I wanted her to see how badly I wanted this baby. "When I lost Peyton, I couldn't help but wonder if I'd ever be happy again. I was missing something and never knew what that was until now. I want that child, Mel, I need her and she needs me."
                          
          Mel wiped away a tear as she sighed. "I have to say, I've been doing this for a while now and I've never heard such a beautiful story as yours. I think you would be a perfect fit with the child and I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure you get custody. Now, I'll need to set up an appointment to check out the farm. Also, just a heads up, the criteria that you are required to meet is to have a nursery. Some people think they can wait a bit but state requirements don't allow that."
                          
          Brock responded. "Not a problem. Can you come by tomorrow morning?"
                          
          She nods. "I have an availability around nine?"
                          
          "That's fine."
                          
         "Good, I'll see you both tomorrow then."
                          
          Brock jots down the address before she leaves. Once she disappears out into the hall, I look to Brock in panic. "What do you mean, not a problem? We don't have a nursery! We don't even have a crib!"
                          
          "Kate, calm down. There's a Babies R Us three blocks from here. We'll get what we need before we go home."
                          
          I shake my head. "We can't put an entire nursery together overnight!"
                          
         "Did you forget who you're talking to? I can do it by myself, so I'm sure together we can get it down in a few hours. Stop worrying."
                          
          He seemed pretty confident, which did ease my mind just a little, but it was still going to be a lot of work. "I'm gonna check on her one more time and then we can go. Lord knows we have a lot to do and I haven't even named her yet." I start to leave the room but he stops me.
                          
          "I think we can wait a few more minutes."
                          
          I look up to him curiously. "Why? We have a lot to do."
                          
          "We still haven't talked about this morning and it's better to do it now than later."
                          
          I was afraid he was going to say that. "We can talk about it tonight; I want to see if the Doctor has been back yet. He was supposed to get her test results earlier."
                          
	          He sighs. "You know you'll just keep putting it off, Kate. Tonight, you'll say tomorrow. Tomorrow, you'll say the next day. Are you that afraid of what I'm gonna say?"
                          
	          I shake my head. "No, I already know what you're gonna say and that scares me..."
                          
	          He seemed hurt. "I told you before the fight that I wouldn't get in that octagon unless you promised me that it would be over. Yet, you're still letting him run your life. I'm not him, you know that."
                          
	          "And I kept my promise, this has nothing to do with Cain. This is me trying to figure my life out."
                          
	          He hesitates. "And I can't be part of that?"
                          
	          "That's what I'm trying to say, Brock. You already are and I'm not sure I'm ready for that. I've never met anyone that treats me the way you do. You took me into your  home, you just gave me ownership to your  land, and now, I'm bringing a newborn into your  house. Doesn't that sound a little weird to you?"
                          
	          He chuckles. "No, it just sounds like Tommy's right."
                          
	          I was surprised to see how light-hearted his response was and that's when I realized his feelings for me ran a little deeper than I expected. "Why me?"
                          
	          "Why not you? There's one thing I've noticed about you and that's that you don't give yourself enough credit. Just because your past is a little rocky doesn't make you a bad person. As I recall, that's exactly what you said to me when I told you my story. Most people shy away from me, Kate, but you don't. You see me for me and one of these days, I'll win you over." He walks toward the door. "I'll meet you at the truck."
                          
	          Win me over? What does that even mean?