"I only fainted Stef. I am fine. Just stop treating me like I'm glass, like I'm going to break!"
                          
"What? Where is this coming from? I don't treat you like that."
                          
"You do! You still treat me like I'm this victim."
                          
"What? What in the world are you talking about?"
                          
"Yes, you treat me like that woman you met at the ice cream shop. The one covered in bruises Stef."
                          
"Lena, I do not. I have never ever treated you like glass, like a victim. Ever. How can you even imply that?"
                          
"Look just leave alone. You're not my boss, you're not my mother, you're not my husband or wife. So you don't  get to dictate who I see and who I don't see. I have my own brain and I don't care what you think or how you feel about it. If you can't handle that then find someone else to be with!"
                          
With that she stormed off slamming the front door to the apartment as I stood there  completely shocked.
                          
FLASHBACK ENDS
                          
 Coming out of my memory and drinking my morning cup of coffee alone on the balcony  Lena and I had  not spoken all night causing me to have the worst sleep ever. It surly left me feeling cranky, tired and at my wits end. What didn't she get. Didn't she see I was only protecting her and in no way was I trying to control her. I would never want to control her ever and I had never seen her as a victim. Ever. Where that was coming from was beyond me for I had never seen her so angry at me. It was a side of her I didn't really know although back when I first met her I had seen a glimpse of it. A tiny bit and that had registered to me as plan fear. Did Lena really mean it when she said I can find someone else? What in the fuck did that even mean? What in the fuck was I supposed to do with that? Was she leaving me already? All these thoughts and emotions were jarring and I didn't know what to do with it as I lit another cigarette. My head by this point was pounding for not only did I suck at handling stress lately but I was doing a shit job at keeping my promises. A really shitty job as I ran my fingers through my hair and rubbing my pounding forehead.
                          
"Mommy?" Snapping out of my thoughts  I soon saw Callie walking over to me as I quickly put my cigarette out but she had seen it and looked to me confused.
                          
"Those are bad for you mommy."
                          
"I know baby. Come here sweets." I smiled as she climbed up on my lap facing me as I leaned in kissing her soft forehead.One thing I noticed about her since Lena had gotten home from the hosptial after fainting was how clingy she had become to me. Yes the girls liked attention from the both of us but Callie was latching onto me way more then usual.
                          
"How are you doing my love. MM? You are up early even before your alarm." Gently I stroked her soft little cheek as she looked at me with wide eyes.
                          
"Why are you smoking mommy?"
                          
Looking deep in her eyes she was the last person I expected to question me and I just wasn't sure how to answer. Callie wasn't the kind of kid you could bullshit. She was much to smart and observant and could see a lie a mile away despite her age.
                          
"Ahh baby girl it's a very bad habit that mommy is going to stop. Ok?"
                          
"We learned they can make your lungs black. Do you want black lungs?"
                          
"No my girl I definitely don't."
                          
"And they can make you really sick. Some people get tubes in their throats and stuff mama. I don't want that to happen to you." She said as tears started to fall down her young face and it was breaking my heart. Breaking my heart that I made her feel this way and had scared her.
                          
"Oh baby no. No, no. Listen to me. Ok, listen to mommy. That won't happen to me ok? It won't I because I will never ever smoke again. Never." I said rubbing her soft cheek and wiping her tears.
                          
"You promise mama?"
                          
"Oh I promise honey. I promise. I need to be around to see you grow up. Yeah?"
                          
"Yes." she said nodding her head up and down. 
                          
"Ok ,come here give me a hug. Give mama a hug." I smiled widely as she soon rested her head on my chest as I held her close to me. Tears started to fall down my face as well seeing how hurt and scared she was as I gently rubbed her back. Goodness not only was I failing at being Lena's girlfriend but I was failing with my girls.
                          
"Mommy?"
                          
"Yeah my baby?"
                          
"I was looking for you?"
                          
"Yeah? Well I am right here babygirl. Mommy isn't going anywhere love." Kissing the top of her head she held on to me even tighter as my mind could only go back to the first time I met Callie when she had ran into me. Even then my heart had opened for her as her cute smile and face had gotten to me as well as Mariana's. Many miles we had come since that day and many miles Mariana had come.
                          
"You know sweet girl we always had something special. Remember career day at your school when you ran into my arms.MM?"

                          
Now lifting her head she looked into my eyes and smiled a bit.
                          
"I was little then mommy. I was only six."
                          
"Oh yeah I know you were very little. Now you're a big girl. Huh?
                          
"Yup! That's when you were Stef."
                          
"Ha. Yeah?"
                          
"Yes. You weren't my mommy then. But I still liked you and wanted you to be. That's why I hugged you."
                          
"I liked you too baby. I liked you very much.You know I still have that picture you made me." I winked as she smiled wide
                          
"Really?"
                          
"Of course. It's on my desk at work."
                          
"Oh. That's cool."
                          
"Yeah. You know you grew up very much since then honey and I'm proud of you. That night you called the police  when you heard your father hurting your mother. That was very, very, brave and I never got a chance to tell you that."
                          
"I wasn't suppose to call. But, I didn't want mama to get hurt anymore."
                          
"I know you didn't baby. And you did a very good thing." I smiled kissing her soft check once again and rubbing it gently with my thumb.
                          
"You're are the bravest little girl  and such a big help. You helped me so much  with your little sister when your mama was in the hospital, we got her to talk and I wouldn't have been able to do that without you love. You're my little star."
                          
"I am?" He eyes were wider then ever as she smiled the biggest smile at me.
                          
"Definitely." Winking at her she leaned in once again hugging me tightly.
                          
"I love you mommy."
                          
"Aww I love you too sweetheart. I love you so very much." I said wrapping my arms around her snuggling my nose in her soft hair.
                          
"How about some breakfast. Huh?"
                          
"Yes." Pulling away she began to play with my long hair as I soon looked over seeing Lena walking toward us and taking a seat beside me.
                          
"Hi mama!"
                          
"Morning sweetheart." Leaning in she kissed our little girls forehead and her soft eyes soon looked into mine. They were a long way away from the angry and cold stare she had given me last night as she placed her hand on top of mine our fingers lacing in each others. It had only been a few hours but I had missed her, I had missed her terribly and I could see she had missed me as well.
                          
"Can we talk?" she soon asked in a soft almost self conscious tone as I left out a soft smile.

                          
"Always my love."