"You know, when they told me I had to rescue a Princess, I didn't expect to find some guy in a dress," comes from a knight standing in the open doorway of the tower.
Well, less of a knight per-say, and more just a guy with the dented and slit helmet of one. He was wearing a loose gray shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and sky blue pants.
"You leave my dress alone!" The Princess accuses and tugs at the frilly collar so it stops trying to slip beneath his breasts. "And where's the rest of your armor anyways? What kind of a hero is missing half his costume?"
"I left it back home at the castle," the man says with a grin, stepping over the pile of upturned boxes scattered across the floor and throughout the room. There are so many that the only door is soon pressed shut again from the force of them all.
"You're insane," the Princess scoffs and crosses his arms.
"Delirious, actually." Delirious corrects and holds out his hand to shake for a greeting. "What about you?" His smile cracking open like the sun against a clear sky.
He bites his lip and shakes his head, but can't help himself and thrusts his hand into the handshake, grasping firmly and declaring, "Chilled-"
"You're an Ice Bitch then?" Delirious interrupts and pokes at Chilled's nipples. "I guess it is a little chilly in here, you're certainly pert enough there."
"Hey now!" Chilled cries, and quickly crosses his arms over chest. "Leave my nipples alone, okay? This dress isn't as warm as it looks."
Delirious pauses a moment to admire the dress before admitting softly, "It is pretty though." And looking up at Chilled, "Why'd you pick pink?"
"It's, ah," he gestures helplessly at all the boxes thrown about the room. "It was the only one that fit. All the other dresses were made for someone more, um.."
"More like me?" Delirious asks, and kicks one of the boxes upright, revealing yet another pile of frilly and lacy dresses.
"Well.. I mean, um." Chilled founders and glances out the window embarrassed. "I was thinking more someone with, uh, boobies."
"I got boobies," comes from the tangled mess of blue fabric and a knight's helmet as Delirious tries to get the dress on over his armor.
"That's not what I - wait, you're going to rip it!" Chilled bursts out and rushes to help Delirious free his arms. "Why didn't you take your helmet off?" Tugging at the ends of the dress and trying to pull the other man's arms free. "That would've made this so much easier!"
"I forgot I was wearing it, okay?" Comes from the man squirming inside the tangled mess.
"You for– why are you pulling this down? I'm pulling up here!" Chilled yells and fights Delirious for the dress over the other man's head.
"It's my dress!" Delirious cries out. "I want to wear it!" Grabbing at as much fabric as he can and yanking down across his metal visor as far as it will go.
"No, it's my dress!" Chilled huffs out as he pulls against Delirious. "Let go, you're going to –"
Rip.
"Goddamnit," he mutters and steps back with only pieces of the dress in his hands.
Delirious laughs gently as he lifts the lid of his visor so he can look Chilled in the eyes, and softly apologizes. An upturn twist of his lips and all Chilled can think of are stones skipping across a clear waters. "I'll get you a new one, okay?"
Chilled's mouth opens, but nothing comes out.
He didn't know what he was expecting, but this wasn't it. Not this man with light gray eyes and flushed features.
"You're very pretty," slips out, and wide-eyed Chilled slaps a hand over his mouth as if it could stop the words from ever having been spoken.
"Hah!" Breaks out of Delirious as he tries to control his giggles. "You're one to talk!"
"What's wrong with the way I look?" Chilled frowns and tugs at his dress. "I think I'm very pretty."
Still chuckling Delirious steps close and stops Chilled's wandering hands by wrapping them up tightly in his own, and pulls the taller man close.
"I mean to say," He corrects. "That you're pretty too."
And stands on his toes to kiss Chilled lightly on the lips. Soft, but firm.
As Delirious steps back down, the flush has already swallowed Chilled's face and is quickly traveling down his neck.
"Um," is all he can say, wide eyed.
.
"What the hell happened in here!" Chilled yells as they finally make it out of the tower and down the first flight of stairs.
The room is normally full of large rough shewn stones and traps and the like. Usually looking rather dull and gray and dusty but today it's a bit more..
"I was having a hard time solving the puzzle," Delirious defends.
"There's a hole in the wall!" Chilled cries out and waves his arms at the giant gaping space in the room where sunlight is now filtering through.
"Hey!" the knight who left his helmet behind in with all the dresses contests. "You try solving some stupid riddle when half the words are worn off the wall!"
Chilled's mouth opens and closes helplessly as he stands in the sunlight. ". . how?" Is all he can manage.
"Well," Delirious shrugs, slouching with his hands in his pockets. "The dragon did most of it really."
Chilled spins around so fast his dress gets caught around his ankles and trips him up. "The dragon? You mean you didn't kill it!?!"
"Nah," Delirious beams and shakes his head. "He's actually pretty cool. You two should hang out sometime."
Words try to come out of Chilled's mouth but all he can do is shake his head and laugh.
"Yeah, I like you," Chilled grins. "Even if you are insane."
.
"Why did you have to pick such a big Princess?" the dragon rumbles at the two of them as they walk outside the castle. "He's two feet taller than you! And where's your helmet too? I knew you'd lose it somewhere, you idiot."
"Shut up, Cartoonz," Delirious tries to shoo the dragon away. "Can't you see I'm picking up a hot chick here?"
"I resent that!" Chilled protests. "I am neither hot, nor a chick!"
"No," Delirious agrees. "But you do have a nice ass."
.
