prologue

                                    

                                          
March 18 2012
                          
I love you Kimberly,take care of your mother and remember to always be contended with what you have,I love you so much".that was the last word I heard from my father. We always knew this day was going to come.hell we were waiting for it but we didn't expect it so soon.
                          
My dad has been suffering from chronic ulcer for the past four years and the doctor said it has already eaten his stomach and he's too fast gone to survive,but the only thing we can do is to buy drugs that will keep him for sometime.
                          
I did all jobs you can think of.I worked as a waitress in the mornings and a bartender at a bar at night just to be able to buy drugs for my father and the little that remains I use it to pay bills and feed me and my mother.but with all my effort I knew he was going to die but I didn't want it to be this soon.

******
The skie was dreary and covered with thick layers of dark cloud.it was as if it was made for the funeral.I was surprised at how many people where here since we didn't really have a big family, only my aunt kaley but she too left us when we went broke.the church was filled with dad's friends from work and mom's fellow workers from the factory and other sympathizers.
                          
The priest finished his sermon and started giving a speech about how he was a generous and just man,caring with many friends and a family who loved him.he left the stage and it was time for my mother to give her speech.she walked to the stage and continued crying.the only thing she could say was "I love you will" and she started crying but was taken off the stage by my aunt.it was heart wrenching to see her cry,cause I wasn't used to it.mum was always smiling and laughing. Always happy and putting smiles on other people faces with her smile she was never the one to be sad even when things were hard she always smiled through it. So I didn't like how she was crying right now.but the surprising thing was that I couldn't cry.everyone around were crying even those that didn't know us were crying but I couldn't. I don't know why maybe his death hasn't really hit me but I couldn't cry.it was my turn to give my speech so I stood up and walked to the stage. When I reached I looked at everybody faces and they all wore the same look "sympathy" but that wasn't what I want cause it doesn't bring him back.
                          
"We are all here today to say our final goodbyes to dad,he was a father to me,a husband to my mother and a friend and a colleague to some.he was always happy,always smiled even when things were not going well.everything he did was for the ones he loved.nothing made him happy than seeing the ones around him happy.he lived his life for everyone but himself and for that I will be glad. I love him so much but I also hate him so much.I hate him for living me and my mum alone in this world.it wasn't supposed to be like this,he was supposed to be here when I graduate high school and college. He was supposed to be alive and watch me grow into a woman,he was supposed to be alive and in the future walk me down the aisle,then one day when I have kids he was supposed to be alive and play with them.but life is so unfair and had other plans for me".my mother was crying and everyone else but I still couldn't cry.
                          
" I hate him for leaving me without a father but I would be forever and ever be proud of him and I will always be glad that I had a dad like him.rest in peace dad.you'll forever continue to be in our heart."I stepped off the stage and into the hands of my mother but I still couldn't cry.
                          
*****
After the final burial and everybody has left.I sat beside my father tombstone and was reading the engraved words over and over again.
      "Here lies john William summers"
1964-2012
Loving husband, father and friend
Forever in our heart.
                          
No matter of how long I read the word engraved on the stone over and over again it doesn't sink in that my dad is dead.it's so surreal. I feel like when I get home I'll see him and we will continue playing chess for hours and no one would win,and after hours when my mum becomes frustrated she'll come and scatter the game and we'll be angry at her and she'll give us M and M's then we will forgive her and after sometime my dad would challenge me on another game of chess and we'll start playing again.but i know when I get home it wouldn't and it hurts so much cause I know he's not coming back again.
                          
I still at the grave and it was getting really late but I still couldn't cry.was I a wicked daughter that the demise of my father couldn't make me cry,I just sat there looking at the stone and waiting for tears to fall.I felt something tap my shoulder and I looked back and saw a guy I've never seen before. He was looked 20-21,he had deep black silky hair,he had broad shoulders and he's body was really built and sturdy.he had blue-gray eyes with long lashes.his jawline was rugged and prickled with a five o'clock shade on his chin.he wore dark jeans and a black V-neck shirt that hung around his body.he just kept looking at me,I thought he was lost so I asked "are you lost"he shook his head and sat beside me.we sat together for sometime not saying anything but after sometime he said" it's okay to cry you know.it doesn't bring back the ones we have lost but it helps the pain in our heart hurt less"and he kept looking at me like he wasn't the one that just said these.like they open the door to a dam,tears just started flowing from my eyes and I started crying loudly. He gave me his handkerchief and rubbed my shoulder continuously. After sometime when I've relaxed a little bit he stood up and started walking away but stopped and smiled at me and said"its okay not to be okay,shit happens in life but only the ones that keeps fighting survive.those that have left us have left us and they're not coming back again. but they don't expect us to keep morphing around their grave,they want us to live our lives and be great."he said then he turned around and started leaving but he stopped again and said "life is too short to spend crying over the one we have lost. go home, sleep and wake up and do something that would make your dad proud of you. And always remember tomorrow is another day." He finished and left.
                          
****
I went home that night and slept but before sleeping I remembered the guy I met today and remember that I didn't even know his name. But i slept knowing that tomorrow is another day even though it won't bring back my dad bit things would be better.
                          
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Well the first one out of many others. I am so happy I know its long but I just wanted to clear all of that.
                          
Please vote and comment.tell me where my mistakes are so I can correct and make it better.
                          
Evie.