38.

                                    

                                          
Ali's P.O.V 
                          
It's Monday. Monday. Cameron and I are getting married on Friday. Friday. It's the week of the wedding and I can't believe it. I'm nervous, happy, scared, excited and stressed. 
                          
Thankfully our biggest problems happened a couple of months back and nothing too bad has happened since then. 
                          
I am however, an emotional wreck. I cry every time something goes wrong or I here something sad because my emotions are all over the place right now. Cam and I have fought a little more than usual because we are both so stressed and that has really not helped anyone. 
                          
I was trying to go over the wedding ceremony with lea in the living room while Cameron, Kian and the jacks had YouTube videos playing on full volume 
                          
"Cameron! Do you have to play them that loud" I yelled looking over at him
                          
"Yes so we can here them over your talking" he yelled back. The others stayed silent and didn't know what to do 
                          
"You want me to leave, I'll just go to the office" Cameron yelled as he stood up taking his phone with him 
                          
"Cameron don't leave" I sighed watching him exit the room 
                          
He turned around looking at me and shrugged his shoulders. Here we go again, tears. I could feel the tears brim my eyes as my lips began to shake 
                          
"Here we go with the tears again" Cameron breathed as his head fell back 
                          
Tears fell from my eyes and I started laughing. Everyone looked at me like I was insane but I couldn't help it 
                          
"What the fuck is wrong with me" I laughed 
                          
"I'm sorry for yelling, but please stop stressing and crying and fighting with me" Cameron sighed as he held my face in his hands and pecked my forehead 
                          
Cameron wiped my eyes and kissed my lips quickly before sitting down beside lea and pulling me onto his lap 
                          
"Let's put this away, we have a rehearsal dinner tomorrow" Cameron spoke as he closed my wedding book and hugged me from behind 
                          
"What if everything goes wrong" I asked worried 
                          
"Nothing is going to go wrong al. We have done an amazing job in planning this wedding and you have been even more amazing with making sure everything was the way we wanted it" Cameron chuckled slightly 
                          
I got up from Cameron's lap without saying a word and walked into the bedroom breaking down crying. 
                          
"Baby what's wrong" Cameron asked as he followed me into the room
                          
"Don't you get it cam! Nothing is going to be right on Friday, nothing! My dad isn't going to be there walking me down the aisle. Our baby is not going to be there to be our flower girl or page boy. I hate it. I hate it and I miss them!" I yelled crying as I fell to the floor  
                          
"Did you even remember that just under three weeks ago we should have welcomed our baby into the world. We should have started our family. Things shouldn't be like this, they shouldn't" I cried as I gripped the t-shirt that I was wearing
                          
"Of course I knew it was baby  LD's birthdate. How could I forget something so important. I didn't want to bring it up because I thought that we were able to look forward and keep moving. I didn't want to set us back" Cameron chocked
                          
"We could have at least done something together to remember our baby. I hate that he or she won't be a part of our wedding" I cried 
                          
"I hate it to, but we wouldn't even be getting married on Friday if that had of happened, we wouldn't be as strong as we are now. Ali, we are starting our family and just because the baby isn't here physically, that doesn't mean that they're not with us and a part of us" Cameron breathed as he slowly made his way over to me and sat beside me 
                          
"We are a family, we always will be, baby LD and any other babies that are yet to come" he soothed as he wrapped an arm around me, kissing my temple softly. 
                          
I let out a huge breath of relief and enjoyed Cameron's embrace. Tears continued to escape my eyes but not as many. I needed to get that out, I feel like I had been holding it in for such a long time now 
                          
"Maybe we could have a prayer said on Friday for our loved ones that aren't with us anymore" I suggested looking up at Cameron 
                          
"That's an amazing idea, I'd love that" he smiled running his hand up and down my arm. 
                          
"Can we not fight anymore, it's getting exhausting" I chuckled as I wiped my eyes. Cameron laughed and kissed my temple     
                          
"I'll run you a bath with some candles and a bath bomb and if your lucky and you have the best fiancé ever, you may just get a massage after" cam whispered still holding me 
                          
"Your so amazing" I whispered as he cuddled into him some more digging my face into his chest