04 | Breakup

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A/N- So, just to remind you this story is purely fictional. There is no factual basis to this, okay? No offense is meant to the celebrities. I think they're absolutely lovely people, but for the sake of the story, I kinda made them slightly crazy.

Also,  this story is just like a sitcom that's playing in my head. It's good for a few laughs, and a bit of feels, but all in all, it's just fun and fluff. Please don't take it too seriously. 

Crazy M rated humor ahead. Beware. Don't worry, this story will go somewhere. Think of it as an outtake, just so you can get the dynamics between the friends. 

Anyway, proceed to the story! 

_________________

-2015-

Two years after the breakup

"So, how are things with Steph, Kris?" Robert asked, grabbing his cup of tea and carefully sipped his drink. 

"Yeah, haven't seen you two together in a while." Suzie said, grabbing a biscuit and nibbling on it incessantly. Beside her was Jack, who was fiddling with his guitar, practicing for his upcoming gig downtown. The group was hanging out at Kristen's house in LA, trying to catch a break between the shooting schedules of Kristen and Robert's upcoming films. 

"Oh. Yeah. Well, you know Steph's a bit..." Kristen bit her lip, trying to find the appropriate word for her girlfriend. 

"Strange?" Jack offered. 

"Eccentric?" Robert added. 

"Nuts?" Suzie said. 

Kristen looked at her friends strangely. "Wow. Why don't you tell me how you really feel about her?" Her voice was dripping with sarcasm.

"Aww. Kris, Steph's great and all. But you know, she can be a little... over the top." Robert said with a shrug. 

"Jesus Christ, did you know she invited me to an orgy? I mean, what you do in the bedroom is none of my business, Kris. But please, please, leave me out of it." Suzie shuddered as she recalled Stephanie's invitation. 

"What orgy?" Kristen yelped. "My girlfriend invites my friends to an orgy and she can't even invite me? What the fuck?" 

"If it's any help, she didn't invite me." Rob muttered. 

Kris shoots a glare at Robert. "You know damn well it doesn't help me, you fucker." 

"Like you would go to an orgy, Kris. You're such a prude." Suzie says, shoving another biscuit into her mouth. 

Robert opened his mouth to say something about Kristen's prudishness, but Kristen's glare effectively shut him up. 

"Of course I won't go to an orgy! But come on. A little heads up to the girlfriend would be highly appreciated." Kristen muttered under her breath. 

"I can see the tabloids now. SoKo goes Loco." Suzie gestures in the air. Robert laughs, earning another fucker from Kristen as she throws a wrapper at him. 

Jack stopped strumming his guitar and joined the conversation. "Hey, if anyone's a fucker, I'm pretty sure it's Steph. Girl must be a firecracker in bed, huh Kris?" 

"Yeah, right." Kristen snorted, earning raised eyebrows from her friends. 

"What was that, Kris?" Robert asked. 

"What was what?" Kristen replied. 

"That." Robert sat up and studied Kristen.  "Jack said that Steph's a firecracker in bed, and you just snorted." Robert's amusement caught Kristen off guard. 

"What are you talking about? I'm not- I don't- No." Kristen avoided the burning stares of her friends, trying to  deflect the attention off of her. 

"Yeah, Kris. What was that all about?" Suzie leaned closer to Kris, trying to goad her into talking. 

"Okay. Fine." With a huff, Kristen gave in. "Steph's not really... into intimate stuff. With me, at least." 

The group gasped. 

"No fucking way. That's why you've been such a bitch the past few weeks!" Suzie exclaimed. 

"Fuck you, Suzie." Kristen snapped at her. Suzie just cackled at Kristen's irritability, finally finding out why she was being such a bitch, even more so than usual.

"Oh no. It's you who needs to be fucked, my friend. See? When you were with Robert, you were like a bundle of sunshine!"

Robert smirked. "Of course. I live to please my women." Kristen gave him the sideeye, rolling her eyes at Robert's cockiness. 

"Yeah, well don't get too cocky, Pattinson. Last I heard, you're not pleasing any women lately." This time, it was Kristen's turn to smirk. 

"Whatever. As if you're getting any." Robert grumbled. Kristen scoffed at Robert, opening her mouth to retaliate, but Suzie stopped them just in time. She raised her hands in front of their faces. 

"Alright, calm down you two." She turned to Kristen. "So, Kris? What do you plan to do with her?" 

"I really liked her, but I knew we weren't gonna last. I mean, it's a miracle we even lasted for almost a year, you know? Ugh." Kristen groaned, grabbing a muffin and peeled off the sides. 

"And not to mention the lack of sex." Suzie pointed out.

"Yeah, that too. I guess I have to break it off with her? Fuck."

"C'mon, it can't be that bad."

"Yeah, I mean the only thing she might do is write a song about me or whatever." Kristen said with a grimace, resigned to the fact that this time tomorrow, she'll probably be without a girlfriend. 

"That's the spirit!" Jack cheered, humming a few lines from a weird song she's never heard before. Robert sat beside her, placing an arm around her for a one armed hug as Suzie pulled out her phone to take a picture of all of them together. 

Kristen couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. Crazy girlfriends and lackluster love lives aside,  she knew she'd always have these people. 

Afterwards, when it was time for everyone to go home, Kristen pulled Robert aside for a moment. 

"Rob, do you think I'll grow up alone?"

"Of course not! Why would you think that? You've got dogs. They're terribly loyal, I'll have you know."

"Okay, smartass. You know what I mean." She sighed. 

"Come here." Robert pulled Kristen in a hug. "It's okay. I'm pretty sure by the time we're 40, you'll be with someone who will love you the way you deserve to be loved. Yes, that includes sex."

Kristen snorted."You just had to ruin it, didn't you?" 

"I'm serious! Plus, I'll always be here for you. Suzie, Jack, Tom and Sienna. We'll probably still be mature adults who'll meet up for a fancy dinner and end up getting hammered by like five glasses of wine each."

Kristen couldn't help but smile at the visual Rob gave her. He kissed her head, his lips lingering a fraction of a second longer than she expected, and said goodbye. 

It took all of her strength to utter those words back to him. 

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