【 You are Lovely 】

                                    

                                          
-TRIGGER WARNING-
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《In your deepest pain》
《In your weakest hour》
《In your darkest night》
《You are Lovely》
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"U-umm Kunikida kun?" You stuttered a little as you approached the tall man. He was working so you were naturally rather fearful of what his reaction would be but he usually only gets angry at Dazai. 
                          
Speaking of Dazai, he was exactly the reason you were bothering the blonde while he was working. 
                          
You received a grunt of acknowledgement and he glanced up from his computer to signal for you to continue what you were saying. 
                          
"Umm... I don't suppose you've heard from or seen Dazai since yesterday have you?" You asked concerned. 
                          
"If anyone was going to see him last night out I anyone here, wouldn't it most likely be you considering you do live together?" He stopped typing and adjusted his glasses looking up at you from his desk. 
                          
"That's exactly why I'm asking you..."
                          
"Huh?"
                          
"He didn't come home last night so I was wondering if he told you anything..." A shadow covered your eyes as you looked down. 
"It's just that he's very secretive towards me and I know he's only doing it because he doesn't want to worry me but... It just does the opposite..."
                          
Kunikida just sighed. Being around Dazai for him was tough enough but he couldn't begin to understand how you were feeling. Kunikida wasn't very good with empathy so he just told you to go home for the day as your shift was almost up anyway. 
                          
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You unlocked the door of your shared apartment and walked in. You took your shoes off and put them on the rack and proceeded to go and get a glass of water only to receive one of the biggest frights in your lifetime. 
                          
"Oh my!! Holy you scared the hell out of me Dazai!" You scream yelled as you entered the kitchen. Your brown haired boyfriend was obviously caught off guard as well as he span around to face you. "(Y-y/n) chan? You're back already?"
                          
"Yeah Kunikida let me off early as my shift was almost finished anyway..."
You both stood in complete silence until you decided to ask where he'd been all this time. 
                          
"Dazai, where have- a-are you ok?" Your attention was quickly turned from where he'd been to his appearance. He looked slightly sickly and his eyes held fear as he watched you. He had a hand behind his back and his breathing was unsteady. 
                          
"I'm perfectly fine... why?"
                          
"You're lying" he wasn't getting out of this so easily. "Let me see your hand." You instructed him as you took a step forward. 
                          
"My hand? Why would you want to see my hand?" He laughed as he held out his right hand for you too see and you narrowed your eyes at him. 
                          
"Your left hand." His jaw clenched and he swallowed quite loudly. "Osamu Dazai. I know your keeping something hidden from me, now show me your left hand."
                          
He refused again so you took the matter into your own hands and paved over to him and grabbed his arm from behind his back only to instantly regret it. 
                          
Your eyes widened with fear even before you had seen the gash across his wrist when you touched a wet substance. Blood ran down his hand and dripped onto the floor. You only now noticed he had taken his bandages off and put them with his coat. 
                          
You put your hand over your mouth in horror from the sight in front of your eyes. You let go of his bloodied rust and grabbed his right one with much more force. "Come with me." He obeyed you as you pulled him after you into the bedroom. 
                          
You sat him on the bed and got the medical supplies out from under the bed and went and got a small amount of water in a bowl with some Cotten wool. You knelt in front of him on 
 floor and got some bandages, and antiseptic out. 
                          
You dabbed around the wound with the cotton wool and then soaked some antiseptic onto another piece. "This might sting a little..." You warned and looked up at him. He had a hand over his eyes and a tear dripped from underneath his bandaged hand. 
You looked back down and continued cleaning his flesh wound. 
                          
After you'd wrapped the bandage around his arm you stood up and cleaned your hands of any blood before removing his hand from his eyes and holding it tightly. 
                          
"Dazai... Why?" That was the only thing you could say without hurting either one of you too much. Anyone could see that he was so ashamed of himself that he just wanted to curl up in a dark corner and be forgotten by the world. 
                          
"I... I just..." He choked on his words. He was obviously in a more depressed state than you realised and that broke you inside. It broke your heart seeing him struggle by himself. Alone. 
                          
"Why didn't you tell me you're hurting so much?"
                          
"Because... It would make you worry and... And I don't like making you worry about me (y/n)."
                          
"Dazai..." You took a small step closer to him and let go of his hand to hug him close to you. His head rested against you stomach and you threaded your fingers through his hair and drew little patterns on his back. 
                          
"You have to tell someone when you feel like you're being backed against a wall sweetie, otherwise it will make you sick mentally and physically..." You felt his arms tighten around your waist and he gripped onto your clothes. 
                          
" I worry because I love you Dazai, just like you worry about me and that's natural in a relationship. So please, don't do this again... Not just for me but for you because it's painful for you. Talk to me when something's wrong like I do when I need help with something. Okay?"
                          
You felt him nod into your embrace. "I'm sorry..." You slowly knelt back down and he knelt on the floor with you this time. He didn't let go of you and he made your shoulder into a shield from your eyes so that he could feel better about him crying. 
                          
"In your deepest pain, in your weakest hour, in your darkest night, you are lovely and I'll always be here for you Dazai. I love you."
                          
"Thank you (Y/n). I love you so much"
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