57. Beyond the Known Circumstances; Raphael

                                    

                                          
I sit in the main room reading one of my Modern Ninja magazines. I try to lose myself between the words, but my mind keeps drifting to Leonardo. After Elizabetta and I lost our tempers at him last night, he didn't turn up for three hours. We missed our last training session of the night because of his absence. I wasn't necessarily opposed to that, however; it was nice to have some downtime.
                          
   But after he came back home, I noticed how upset he was. He looked so bummed, so fragile, so not like Leonardo. It was frightening.
                          
   Even now, I'm still haunted by the dull look in his eyes. He didn't even bother to wake us up for training today, though I caught him practicing by himself in the dojo. His kicks were aimed by frustration rather than precision. That isn't like him, either.
                          
   Now, I'm just waiting for someone else besides Leonardo to give me company. Donatello is busying himself in his lab, and I really don't want to hear a complicated break down of what he's doing, so I avoid him. Everyone else is still resting, or so I assume.
                          
   Just as I start wishing to have someone to talk to, Elizabetta walks out of the spare room, blinking sleep from her eyes. She isn't my favorite being in the lair, but I can have a conversation with her, at least.
                          
   "What time is it?" she mumbles as she walks toward me.
                          
   "Late," is all I have to say.
                          
   She looks at me in surprise. "Did I miss training?" she asks worriedly.
                          
   "Nope," I reply, turning the page in my magazine. "Leo hasn't started it yet. He's just in the dojo by himself. I think he's moping around," I add with a guilty frown.
                          
   Elizabetta mirrors my expression as she takes a seat beside me. "He must still be upset over last night, then. Training will be brutal," she says regretfully.
                          
   I grunt in agreement.
                          
   We both seem to silently agree that we were too harsh on the leader yesterday. We sit quietly for a long time, dwelling on our remorse.
                          
   Within the next hour, Edmund, Donatello, and Michelangelo  emerge from the other rooms. They greet me and head off to the dojo. Deciding we should follow, Elizabetta and I reluctantly head after them.
                          
   Leonardo is sitting by the tree in a meditating pose. He opens his eyes as we approach and dully scans our faces.
                          
   "So, uh, what moves are we rehearsing today?" Donatello asks after an uncomfortable pause.
                          
   Leonardo studies us for a long time before answering, "We won't be practicing anything."
                          
   Shocked, my jaw drops. He spent the past week drilling us to perfection, and now he's just going to give up. But as he starts to explain himself, I realize I'm wrong.
                          
   "You've prepared yourself physically, but none of you are ready mentally," the blue-clad turtle continues. "We should meditate today."
                          
   "Aww!" Michelangelo whines. "But I don't-"
                          
   "If you're going to complain, you can leave now and not go into battle with us at all," Leonardo snaps.
                          
   I blink. "Uh, trying to steal my thunder, Leo?" I ask in the most serious, non-sarcastic way I can. He's being really edgy, which is kind of my job.
                          
   Leonardo's eyes flare up slightly as his gaze meets mine, but the flame extinguishes quickly. He's definitely still mad about last night.
                          
   "Meditating positions. Now," he orders.
                          
~*~*~*~
                          
   I sit in the main room, eating dinner with my brothers, Edmund, and Elizabetta. Casey and April had stopped by as well and joined in on the meal.  Only Leonardo isn't around.  He chose to stay in the dojo and meditate longer.  He becomes more like Master Splinter with each passing day.