Chapter 26

                                    

                                          
"Stanley!" A voice bellowed to us from the kitchen as we entered the shack, our feet spreading mud onto the worn carpet. "Breakfast's nearly ready! Can you go get Mabel? She's been upset... you know... after Dipper left."
                          
"Hey kid," Stan whispered discretely, his husky voice growling into my ear. "Can you see if you can cheer her up? I need to, uh, talk with my brother." 
                          
I hurried up the stairs, to the attic, crashing through the limp door with astounding force, indescribably worried, for a reason I didn't exactly understand. But she wasn't laying on her bed, as she usually was nowadays, staring blankly at the moulding spots on the ceiling, wincing as she tried to remember. I panicked, rushing around hurriedly, trying to think of places she'd be, places to hide when she wanted to shut out the world, when she was too close to giving up on her thoughts, her meaningless new memories. 
                          
Then I looked up.
                          
The window to the roof was open, the latch swaying from side to side, clinking softly against the wooden frame that was rotting away in the heat. The blazing sun was ascending over the valley as morning broke, casting a dull silhouette over the girl sitting on the edge of a cheap sign for a tourist trap in the Oregon woodlands.
                          
Her thighs brushed against the splinters, tearing into her creamy flesh, but she didn't seem to notice the new scars that adorned her. Tears rolled down her cheeks and hit the ground below us, to the bare patch of sandy dirt, spotted with rare tufts of grass, which quietly shriveled before us. She was watching them, fascinated, contemplating the world around her, the world she was stuck in.
                          
I called out to her, but she didn't hear me. Or, she was choosing to ignore me. I shouted again, still with no answer to my pleads. I didn't want to get too close to her, push her over the edge that she was lingering dangerously on, but I refused to give up, to walk away like I didn't notice anything was wrong. I had to keep her safe, happy, as I promised her I would.
                          
"Mabel, please..." I cried out for a third time. "Come with me, come inside. Please..."
                          
"Who's Mabel?" Her voice rung out through the stillness around us. "Because she's not me. I'm not the one you say you need, I don't know her anymore; I don't even know who I am. Tell me, what am I meant to do? Carry on lying to everyone? They care about me, Dipper, and they're good people too. They don't deserve to see me like this.
                          
"I know what everybody's talking about before I enter a room, and they go silent, thinking that they're being kind by not telling me the truth. I'm not an idiot; I know I'm only prolonging the inevitable here. And is it even worth it? Struggling along, and making everyone else suffer with me? Look, you said you care about me, and that you'd always love me. If you meant any of that, leave me here. Please, I can't do this anymore! Please, Dipper... let me go."
                          
I sat down next to her, our legs swinging gently, slightly out of sync. Looking across to her, tears blurring my vision, I knew she meant it. In one swift motion, she scooped my hand into hers, her palm pressed hard against mine. As I gazed at her, she formed a hopeful smile, one that seemed to promise a happy outcome to all the troubles that kept us awake. Yet, here we were. 
                          
"Thank you for taking care of me," she closed her eyes, blocking out the world she loved as a child, the one she used to dance in, the one she said she never wanted to leave. "And for loving me, even though I don't deserve it. Mabel Pines does. I'm sorry it had to end this way. Goodbye, brobro."
                          
She dared to take a peek at the morning sky over the pine trees, the swirling oranges and pinks exploding above our heads. Then, she pushed herself off the edge. I desperately reached out to her as she fell, but my hand laid empty as she drifted further down. She hit the ground with a too suddenly, her hair sweeping across her face, hiding the drained colour of her cheeks, as pale as a ghost. My sister was gone. 
                          
***
                          
I am so, so sorry. Don't hate me now. 
Song for this chapter: Spanish Sahara by Foals. It's at the top. Listen to it if you want to mourn Mabel with me. That beautifully depressing song made me do this.
Again, I'm so sorry. Love you guys, 
Em xx