Φ «--- that symbol means that I have edited and revise and helps me keep track of the chapters that I put more effort in. If you have read The Hybrid's Submission, this symbol is also present with the chapter titles that I have already done. When I'm not working on updates -Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday are the update days- I will be working on my other stories, there are about 3 stories that I'm going to leave alone. I'm afraid those are too dreadful, those will have to be completely rewritten -Continue, The Mask, and In A Corridor, but later down the road. The others I will revise and edit. Also I'm going to work on sentence structures, well overall on my writing. I started off just to goof off and see where it goes, but I'm actually really enjoying writing. So I'm going to put more effort into how I word my stories from now on.
End of A/N
A small light body drapes my torso along with his satiny crimson mane. Luminous green orbs peering into my own hollow sombre eyes. My precious son, stubborn as a mule, or should I say prince, has made it his mission to 'put a smile on my face.'
True to his vow, my Hayden has accomplished his mission. He always manages to do so. Now it's a game of 'How Long Can Mommy Last Before He Laughs?'
My teasing boy breathes a mock sigh of sorrow. "I guess I have to pull out the big guns."
Oh, he better not! But I don't have a chance to run for my life as his tiny digits prods my ribs. The outrageous act of simulation on my skin forces my diaphragm to contract in a bursts of giggles.
Hayden, the little monster, shines with accomplishment, but he knows he's going to have to run because once he's done, I'm gonna hang him by his toes!
In a flash, Hayden's out the door, leaving a trail of darling giggles. Not missing a beat, I dash after the shrieking child.
"I'm gonna get your piggies!" I purposely stay a few feet from him. It's no fun catching him right away.
"Noooooooooo!" His shrieking crescendos as does his legs.
Amping up in my tactics, I began to sing the jaws theme song. Hayden, bless his silly soul, slides and smacks hard into the wall as he tries and fails to make it around the corner.
Never liking my baby in any kind of pain, my motherly instincts, instantly amps to full volume.
Before Hayden even has a chance at whimpering, he's safely in my arms as I examine his knees, stomach, chest, arms, legs, and forehead for any boo-boos.
He manages not an injury. Even if it was just a knock to a wall.
"That damn Jaws Theme Song always gets me hurt, mommy!" A heavy breathing Hayden huffs.
Usually I would scold the young boy foe using that type of language, but he's hurt, so I'll let it slide.
Also he's kind of cute when he does. There's just something about little children cursing that's so darn cute.
I'm terrible...
"But that's a price to pay!" The cutie-pie whoops. "You laughed and you're happy!"
An awe moment! "You always make me happy, baby."
The wide-eyed boy opposed my statement with a frown. "Not lately."
I know Hayden notices more than I think he does, he's a smart kid. But there's that part, the biggest part in me, that doesn't want him to know that mommy is sad and depressed.
He's a child, he doesn't need to know mommy's problems. He needs to worry about which toy he's going to play with next, what cartoon he wants to watch next, or if he's going to eat that broccoli on his plate.
Hayden is a little boy, with only little boy worries, and I will protect that. Nothing will change that.
I, his mother will protect him physically and mentally. Even at the risk of my own life and sanity.
So I compress and bottle my negative feelings that swirl and storm deep inside me to never be found. Unless the bottle becomes too much and breaks.
I make a vow, an oath to myself to only express positive emotions. Not for myself, but for Hayden, the light of my life.
He deserves that.
With the very last emotion locked away and buried, I focus my all attention on the little wide-eyed boy.
"I'm fine, baby." A gentle lingering kiss to his forehead wipes away his worries.
Seeming to believe me, with a peck to my lips, he's off on little boy adventures taking my heart also.
With my ass on the cold hard floor and my back pressed against the wall. I realize just how hollow I feel without the sandstorm of emotions raging within.
There's no positive emotions....
Am I that destroyed that I don't even have an ounce of raw emotions? Only pretend...
All because of the all mighty king!
Mates?
A blessing?
I say curse....
Well my mating bond is.
Picked by the goddess. She has a sick sense of humor to give mates the power to destroy each other. She must hate me to pair me with Haythem.
The absolute devastation he caused upon my soul. He might as well have tore my organs from my pathetic body to smear the world with my flesh and blood!
What have done?
In a past life, was I a monstrous beast? Did I murder children then bathed in their blood? Did I enjoy inflicting endless torture upon others? Did I forsaken the goddess?
But even I, broken, still see charisma in mates.
