XXXI - Rest

                                    

                                          
Viniel's POV
                          
Wala na akong nagawa when she walked away from us but to watch her. Walang masyadong tao sa lobby ng building where our studio is located pero may ilan pa rin. 
                          
Everyone is giving me a dirty look but I don't really care about them. Totoo namang niloko ko si Tanya so I think I deserved to be embarrassed in front of them.
                          
Natawa na lang ako sa sarili ko. This is exactly what I wanted, 'yung hiwalayan ako ni Tanya. But why am I hurting now? Para akong tanga.
                          
"Viniel, are you okay? Does it hurt?" My thoughts were interrupted when I heard Chelsea spoke. Lumapit siya sa akin then she cupped my face.
                          
I held her hand na naka-hawak sa mukha ko. "I'm fine, Chelsea. Let's just leave. People here are throwing dirty looks at you too and I'm not liking it."
                          
I did this because of my Mom. I did this because I chose to be a good son. I realized that maybe, Chelsea is right all along; that she really is the one for me and not Tanya. My family knows hers very well and we've been friends for years bago pa maging kami ni Tanya.
                          
We went to the nearest club na nahanap namin. Naghanap agad kami ng table then we orderd drinks when we got settled. We started drinking. I was expecting Chelsea to start a conversation with me and tell me what a bitch Tanya is because of what she did to us a while ago. Pero hindi siya nagsalita.
                          
"Won't you say anything?" I finally broke the silence when I couldn't contain it anymore. The loud music is blaring at this club but I feel like nabibingi pa rin ako sa katahimikan namin ni Chelsea. "You're unusually silent tonight."
                          
She emptied the contents of her shot glass before she spoke. "That's Tanya, right?"
                          
"Nope. That was just another girl I played with." I lied because I'm not liking the pitiful look she's giving me. "Maybe she really loved how I perform at bed kaya hindi naka-move on sa akin."
                          
"Hindi ako tanga, Viniel. I know her." She said sternly. "If she's just another girl na nilaro mo then why did you look at her like your heart's shattering when she started to cry?"
                          
I gritted my teeth. "Then why did you still ask when you already know the answer to your damn question?" I snapped.
                          
"Because I want to know what's wrong!" She shouted. "Ano ba talagang nangyayari, Viniel? Did you break up with her already? Why do you suddenly want me to be your girlfriend?"
                          
"Because I don't love her anymore! Sinabi ko na 'yon sa'yo, 'di ba?" I replied, still trying my best to restrain myself because if not, I might lose it at magwala na talaga ako ngayon mismo. "I love you, Chelsea. Isn't that an enough explanation?"
                          
"Damn, Viniel! We both know that that's bullshit!" She shouted once again then she threw her shot glass at me. Good thing it didn't hit me. Pero nabasag naman. Now, I have to pay for that.
                          
"If that's what you're thinking, then why did you agree with this?"
                          
"Because I can see that you're hurting!" She said angrily, her tears starting to fall this time. "And I want to help you. You're one of my best friends and I can't bear to see you like this."
                          
I smirked. "Best friend? Did I hear that right?" I asked, ignoring what she just said.
                          
She took a deep breath to calm herself bago siya nagsalita. "I'm. . . I'm seeing someone now, Viniel."
                          
I was shocked because of her confession kaya hindi ako nakasagot agad so she continued what she was saying. "And this guy, he's giving me much more love than what I begged you to give me. I can't say that I love him already, though. But I'm sure that I'm starting to have feelings for him. Actually, I kinda feel guilty that I'm with you right now."
                          
Natahimik na naman kami after that. I continued drinking while Chelsea busied herself watching the people dance.
                          
"I'm sorry, Chels." I said after a few moments. "Now, I kinda feel guilty, too. I feel like you're cheating to that guy with me."
                          
I wasn't really kidding but Chelsea laughed kaya natawa na rin ako.
                          
"We're not even together." Chelsea said.
                          
"But you know he loves you, right?"
                          
She nodded. "Yes, but I haven't really talked to him about my feelings yet."
                          
I took a sip from my shot glass before I replied. "Then you better do it now."
                          
She didn't answer. Hindi siya nakatingin sa akin so I can't really read her expression. But after a while, I saw her smile. 
                          
"Maybe, you're right." She said then she stood up. "I'm sorry, Viniel but I really have to leave you now."
                          
"And where are you going?"
                          
"I have to talk to him now." She answered, I can see that she's eager to leave. "We sort of fought because of you. He's supposed to introduce me to his family tonight. We already talked about this before but obviously, I chose to be with you instead."
                          
My eyes widened. "What? Then ihahatid kita. Just tell me where you need to be—"
                          
I tried to stand up pero napa-upo lang ako ulit because I suddenly felt dizzy.
                          
"God, Viniel!" Chelsea assisted me para maka-upo ulit. "I think you had too much. I'll drive you home."
                          
"No, no." I told her. "You should leave now. I'll just rest for a while then I'll go home."
                          
"No, I can't leave you like this."
                          
"Come on, Chelsea." I said and massaged my throbbing head. "I'll be fine. Just go and fix everything with that guy."
                          
I know na hindi naman magpapatalo si Chelsea so I just told her that I'll call one of our drivers if I still don't feel better after resting and she finally agreed.
                          
"Fine. But promise me you'll call me once you get home."
                          
"I will." I assured her. "If I'm sober enough to do so later." I joked.
                          
She chuckled then she gave me a gentle smile. "Viniel, I hope you and Tanya can fix everything too. When I saw her eyes a while ago, I saw how much she's hurting as well. And she doesn't deserve that. She loves you so much and I know you feel the same."
                          
She smiled at me once again before she left.
                          
I got a chance to ponder about my thoughts when she left. Chelsea's absolutely right. If I'm hurting right now, malamang mas nasasaktan si Tanya. I left her without even telling her why. I also realized that it is not really her fault that that misfortune happened to me and my Mom years ago. Maybe my Mom has the right to blame Mama Taira for what happened pero wala naman talagang kasalanan si Tanya.
                          
I love Tanya. And my Mom loves me. I'm sure she'll understand na hindi ko talaga kayang hiwalayan si Tanya. I called a waiter to pay for everything. I stood up and even if I feel a litte bit dizzy, I'm sure na kaya ko pa rin namang mag-drive. I headed straight to my car. I need to see Tanya right now. I need to fix everything between us.
                          
Nag-drive ako papunta sa kanila. My head's throbbing so bad so I tried to massage it. 
                          
And I shouldn't have done that.
                          
Because the moment I looked in front of me again, there's already a car in my lane. I tried to avoid it but I was too late kaya bumangga pa rin siya sa akin. I closed my eyes dahil sa sakit ng ulo ko. Pain enveloped my body too dahil sa impact. I also felt hot liquid streaming down on the left side of my face. 
                          
Damn! I can't die right now! I can't die without telling Tanya how much I love her and how sorry I am for hurting her. I'll just close my eyes for now but I swear I won't die. I can't. Not yet. I just need to rest.