December 6, 1999
Today is Monday. On Friday, we had a dance. [I am amazed at how many dances I attended. Maybe it just seems that way because I felt the need to write about every single one of them in such detail.] It was fun, and I danced with Tyler three times. I didn't dance with Jacob - I didn't really feel the urge to. I guess I like him more as a friend.
Anyway, everyone was saying that Tyler was going to ask me out. The DJ announced that it was the last song, and I looked around for Tyler, but I couldn't see him. Then all of a sudden, Mark was right next to me, just sort of looking at me. He had been watching me all night, but had not yet asked me to dance. So he just looked at me, and it was becoming kind of awkward, so I said, "What is it, Mark?" [Yeah seriously, Mark, what is it?] He said, "I want to dance with you," as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, and I was a dummy for not realizing it.
So we started to dance, and I wished he were Tyler. Then I noticed Tyler come into the gym from the hall, where I guess he had been getting a drink. He looked around for a minute, and I saw his eyes coming toward me, so I looked away. I knew he saw me dancing with Mark, though. He just kind of stood there dejectedly, and I was seriously considering saying to Mark, "Sorry, I have to go dance with Tyler." But I decided against it because that would have been rude to Mark.
After the dance, Gina was like, "Tyler, you have to ask Emily out!" But I did not send her over to do that! I was mad at her for saying that to him, because I don't want him to get annoyed with me. Michelle is having a party for Gina's birthday on Friday - maybe things will get sorted out there.
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The UnSlut Project
Non-FictionI was the 6th-grade "slut." And I kept a diary. So I decided to create The UnSlut Project in the hopes that my own diary entries could provide some perspective to girls who currently feel trapped and ashamed. I am publishing these entries one at a...